The Best Episodes Written By Chris Hayward

Every TV Episode Written by Chris Hayward Ranked from Best to Worst by Thousands of Voters

Episode Rankings

  1. #1 Fan Favorite
    undefined Season 4 Episode 8 - The Return of the Ancient Mariner
    7.5/10(2 votes)

    #1 - The Return of the Ancient Mariner

    S4:E8

    With an attempt to kidnap Admiral Hardgrade in the works, Max has him stay in his apartment.

    Director:N/A

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  2. undefined Season 4 Episode 3 - Closely Watched Planes
    7.5/10(2 votes)

    #2 - Closely Watched Planes

    S4:E3

    Max is assigned to protect CONTROL Courier Busby during a plane ride, but Busby mysteriously disappears from the bathroom in mid-flight.

    Director:N/A

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  3. undefined Season 4 Episode 1 - The Impossible Mission
    7.5/10(2 votes)

    #3 - The Impossible Mission

    S4:E1

    The Chief assigns 86 and 99 to retrieve a deadly scientific theory from KAOS. The search takes the CONTROL agents to a TV studio, where they disguise themselves as dancers.

    Director:N/A

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  4. undefined Season 4 Episode 11 - The Farkas Fracas
    7.5/10(2 votes)

    #4 - The Farkas Fracas

    S4:E11

    When Agent 99 is caught without dessert, she gratefully accepts chocolate mousse from her solicitious neighbor Naomi Farkas. Naomi and her husband Emil are secret KAOS agents who hope to photograph some papers the Chief has with him.

    Director:N/A

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  5. undefined Season 4 Episode 4 - The Secret of Sam Vittorio
    7.0/10(2 votes)

    #5 - The Secret of Sam Vittorio

    S4:E4

    Thirty years earlier bank robbers Connie and Floyd met up with Sam Vittorio, who had robbed 192 banks. Now dying, Vittorio will only reveal the location of his hidden loot to his protégés, who look remarkably like Max and 99.

    Director:N/A

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  6. undefined Season 4 Episode 9 - With Love and Twitches
    7.0/10(2 votes)

    #6 - With Love and Twitches

    S4:E9

    The big day arrives for Smart and Agent 99, but almost without Smart as he is sidetracked by a bizarre case. KAOS scientist Dr. Madre passes information on the location of the Melnick uranium mine to Max, in the form of a "drinkable map".

    Director:N/A

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  7. undefined Season 4 Episode 6 - The Worst Best Man
    7.0/10(2 votes)

    #7 - The Worst Best Man

    S4:E6

    Each time Smart picks a best man for his upcoming wedding to Agent 99, the man meets with a mysterious accident. The Chief deducts that there must be a link between all of the accidents and KAOS because all of Max's prospects are fellow agents. To prevent further loss of manpower a t CONTROL, Hymie is appointed best man. KAOS then reveals it's true interest in Max's choice of best man - nearly to the extinction of CONTROL.

    Director:N/A

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  8. undefined Season 4 Episode 5 - Diamonds Are a Spy's Best Friend
    7.0/10(2 votes)

    #8 - Diamonds Are a Spy's Best Friend

    S4:E5

    KAOS is using its League of Bald Headed Men to steal diamonds and smuggle them out of the country and fund their European payroll.

    Director:N/A

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  9. undefined Season 4 Episode 25 - The Not-So-Great Escape  (1)
    7.0/10(1 votes)

    #9 - The Not-So-Great Escape (1)

    S4:E25

    Max is assigned to see Agent Kendall safely on a plane to Europe. However, Kendall mysteriously disappears from the airport after being paged. When Max takes the Chief to the airport to find out what happened, the Chief also disappears after being paged.

    Director:N/A

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  10. undefined Season 4 Episode 19 - Absorb the Greek
    7.0/10(1 votes)

    #10 - Absorb the Greek

    S4:E19

    The Chief takes up computer dating and winds up dating a gorgeous young woman. The Chief's boss (unseen) orders Max and 99 to follow the Chief to make sure that this romance is not a security risk. 99 also thinks that the Chief should be dating someone more his age, like her mother. The young woman is actually the wife of Dr. Paponickolini, who is giving the Chief a secret formula for eternal youth. The Chief arrives at Max's apartment for a dinner date with 99's mom but instead KAOS shows up and kidnaps 99's mother, thinking she's the wife of Dr. Paonickolini.

    Director:N/A

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  11. undefined Season 1 Episode 7 - Bureaucrat
    7.0/10(1 votes)

    #11 - Bureaucrat

    S1:E7

    Guests to the 12th include a drunken bureaucrat and the 12-year-old who robbed Chano's apartment; Wojo closes the precinct's favorite delicatessen for minor health-code infractions.

    Director:N/A

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  12. undefined Season 1 Episode 8 - Ms. Cop
    7.0/10(1 votes)

    #12 - Ms. Cop

    S1:E8

    An overzealous lady cop ruffles the feathers of the testosterone-run 12th; Chano nabs an obscene phone caller. Linda Lavin (""Alice"") debuts as Detective Janice Wentworth.

    Director:N/A

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  13. undefined Season 1 Episode 3 - Snow Job
    7.0/10(1 votes)

    #13 - Snow Job

    S1:E3

    The squad grapples with guarding a department store payroll and a flasher who attempts suicide in the bathroom.

    Director:N/A

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  14. undefined Season 1 Episode 9 - Vigilante
    7.0/10(1 votes)

    #14 - Vigilante

    S1:E9

    Barney is visited by Inspector Luger, who complains that his men aren't disliked enough by the public; a neighborhood vigilante is well into his twilight years; Wojo collars a cross-dressing teamster.

    Director:N/A

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  15. undefined Season 4 Episode 7 - A Tale of Two Tails
    6.7/10(3 votes)

    #15 - A Tale of Two Tails

    S4:E7

    Smart and the Chief try all the standard escape methods and each time KAOS has Seigfried and his henchman, Starker, block them. The Chief realizes that there must be an informer in the camp and devises a plan to fool the informer.

    Director:N/A

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  16. undefined Season 4 Episode 13 - Schwartz's Island
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #16 - Schwartz's Island

    S4:E13

    The Smarts' honeymoon cruise ends when their sailboat blows up. They drift to an uncharted island, which soon proves to be owned by KAOS chief Seigfried.

    Director:N/A

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  17. undefined Season 4 Episode 12 - Temporarily Out of CONTROL
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #17 - Temporarily Out of CONTROL

    S4:E12

    KAOS fakes military call-up orders for Maxwell Smart and the Chief for the US Navy! Smart's restoration to the rank of Ensign makes him the Chief's superior, humiliating the Chief, who was restored to Seaman.

    Director:N/A

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  18. undefined Season 4 Episode 20 - To Sire, with Love (1)
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #18 - To Sire, with Love (1)

    S4:E20

    Max must hid the king of Caronia in his apartment. Agent 99 is contently getting Max and the king confused as the king is 86's double. KAOS tries to kill them by putting a tarantula in the apartment.

    Director:N/A

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  19. undefined Season 4 Episode 15 - Hurray for Hollywood
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #19 - Hurray for Hollywood

    S4:E15

    Max and 99 go undercover as actors Lawrence Hollywood and Viola Vain to learn how KAOS is using performances of a play to communicate with their agents.

    Director:N/A

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  20. undefined Season 4 Episode 17 - Tequila Mockingbird
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #20 - Tequila Mockingbird

    S4:E17

    Smart and 99 pose as a flamenco dancer and a seedy doctor to fool KAOS as both search for hidden gems in Mexico.

    Director:N/A

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  21. undefined Season 4 Episode 22 - Shock It to Me
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #21 - Shock It to Me

    S4:E22

    Dr. Erick Zharko and his assistant Bruce wire Max and 99 to a Dr. Frankenstein-like apparatus. Zharko figures that a jolt of his specially controlled electricity will shock Max and 99 into a five year sleep.

    Director:N/A

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  22. undefined Season 4 Episode 26 - The Not-So-Great Escape  (2)
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #22 - The Not-So-Great Escape (2)

    S4:E26

    CONTROL agents tunnel out of the KAOS POW camp à la "The Great Escape."

    Director:N/A

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  23. undefined Season 1 Episode 4 - Graft
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #23 - Graft

    S1:E4

    An old friend of Barney's is assigned to investigate allegations of corruption in the squadroom; Chano is after an obscene phone caller.

    Director:N/A

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  24. undefined Season 1 Episode 5 - The Courtesans
    6.0/10(1 votes)

    #24 - The Courtesans

    S1:E5

    A prostitute threatens to file harassment charges against Wojo; Rachel wants to move into her own apartment.

    Director:N/A

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  25. undefined Season 4 Episode 24 - Greer Window
    5.0/10(1 votes)

    #25 - Greer Window

    S4:E24

    CONTROL corners KAOS Agent Klineschmidt in a house and attempts to take him alive. Before they can do that, he manages to shoot Max in the buttocks. Forced to stay at home, Max amuses himself by using binoculars to spy on the office building across the street. The office he's watching belongs to Otto Greer, who is a government contractor. Top secret papers have been disappearing from his office so the Chief assigns 99 to work undercover as secretary to Greer. Max keeps an eye on 99's progress and discovers too late that Greer is a KAOS agent planning to kill both of them.

    Director:N/A

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Chris Hayward Ratings Summary

"The Return of the Ancient Mariner" is the best rated episode written by Chris Hayward. It scored 7.5/10 based on 2 votes. It was directed by N/A. It aired on 11/9/1968 and is rated 0.0 points higher than their second-best episode, "Closely Watched Planes".