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The Best Episodes Written By Greg Hemphill

Every TV Episode Written by Greg Hemphill Ranked from Best to Worst by Thousands of Voters

Episode Rankings

  1. #1 Fan Favorite
    undefined Season 4 Episode 3 - Dial A Bus
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #1 - Dial A Bus

    S4:E3

    Jack and Victor succumb to the lure of the Dial-A-Bus, but this one doesn't stop where they expected.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  2. undefined Season 2 Episode 8 - Buntin'
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #2 - Buntin'

    S2:E8

    Navid finds Pete 'the Jakey', Craiglang's answer to Barny Gumball, has been letting himself go, lately. It seems he's been going through the shopkeeper's rubbish for food. Is it, in fact, a giant rat, or is Pete plumbing every further depths of scabbydom? But soon he's seen in The Clansman clean-shaven and wearing a brand new suit. Has someone died, or is Pete suddenly involved in top-secret affairs of the state?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  3. undefined Season 2 Episode 7 - Shooglies
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #3 - Shooglies

    S2:E7

    After an unusually expensive meal, Jack and Victor decide to take a literal trip down memory lane, when they visit a new exhibition in the city centre dedicated to the Glasgow of their childhood. They meet an old friend, Frank McCallum. But is he all that he appears to be?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  4. undefined Season 2 Episode 9 - Dug
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #4 - Dug

    S2:E9

    Isa's unwelcome husband returns once more. Jack and Victor have a major falling-out: Victor's son John is as distant and uncaring as ever, while Jack has warm tears in his eyes when his daughter Mary in Canada sends him a video tape of her and the weans. Things are compounded when Jack is invited to fly out to Canada to visit. Will Victor end up on the plane, or have our boys finally had enough of one another? And Winston agrees to pose as Isa's fiancé in order to ward off her husband - but how far is he willing to go to maintain the illusion?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  5. undefined Season 1 Episode 3 - Cauld
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #5 - Cauld

    S1:E3

    Winter arrives in Craiglang with a vengeance. Jack and Victor find an old friend of theirs drops dead of the cold - is it time to take part in Winston's nerfarious scheme to steal 'leccy?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  6. undefined Season 1 Episode 6 - Scones
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #6 - Scones

    S1:E6

    Tam, the tapping king of Craiglang, has fallen on his feet with his latest win: a lifetime's free supply of film tickets and confectionary. Not to be outdone, our boys set out to win a slogan competition. Meanwhile, an old face from Isa's past returns...

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  7. undefined Season 1 Episode 5 - Waddin'
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #7 - Waddin'

    S1:E5

    Navid is giving out invitations to what promises to be the wedding of the year in Craiglang. They're as rare and desired as Willy Wonka's golden tickets - so why don't Jack and Victor have one? And what are they to do when an old friend - and notorious tapper - 'dies', and the chance to slip back a few items presents itself?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  8. undefined Season 1 Episode 4 - Courtin'
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #8 - Courtin'

    S1:E4

    Jack realises how long it's been since his wife died and starts to find new love with a lovely woman in the city centre. But to win the fair lady's heart, a double date is in order. What will Victor do when he sees Barbara's sister, and what will he do when it turns out that all isn't as it seems with Barbara?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  9. undefined Season 3 Episode 1 - Hoaliday
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #9 - Hoaliday

    S3:E1

    Jack and Victor kick off series 3 in an opening episode that picks up where the last episode of series 2 left off - the boys are flying to Canada to visit Jack's family. The boys are having a time of it - with a belated dose of jetlag - and take in the marvels of Gutbusters, Niagra Falls, Ice Hockey and tacky souvenirs. Soon the time looms for them to come home - or is it? And, back in Craiglang, there's a new man in Isa's life...

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  10. undefined Season 3 Episode 2 - Swottin'
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #10 - Swottin'

    S3:E2

    Jack and Vic feel their lives have become routine to the point of redundancy. Does salvation lie in Glasgow University's course in Medicial Proficiency, or will the lure of a 75p pint be too much? Meanwhile, Boaby's losing customers and can't get his hole in a barrel of fannies. Can a quiz night and a lovely new barmaid be the answer to both problems?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  11. undefined Season 3 Episode 3 - Cairds
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #11 - Cairds

    S3:E3

    Boaby bars Jack & Vic & Co. from the Clansman. Turning Osprey Heights into a mini Las Vegas, Tam wins Joe's motor-wheelchair. However, plans are afoot to win it back, while Winston's feud with the bookies reaches a hilarious climax...

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  12. undefined Season 3 Episode 4 - Big Yin
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #12 - Big Yin

    S3:E4

    The Neds (hooligans) begin a reign of terror in Craigland. Jack and Victor contact an old friend to come to town and take matters in his giant-sized hands. If they can just keep him away from the Miduri... Meanwhile, Winston's taking up a valued place at the local supermarket and suddenly finds that Craiglang has become a fair model for Sing Sing...

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  13. undefined Season 3 Episode 5 - Oot
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #13 - Oot

    S3:E5

    Archie (Sylvester McCoy), an old friend of J & V's, finally has to leave the place where he has been secluded for nearly half a century, never going outside. Now the council are knocking his place down, but are Jack and Victor the best guides to the new century? Winston is experimenting with turning his house into a cinema. Looks like the Towering Inferno's on at Osprey Heights...

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  14. undefined Season 3 Episode 6 - Aff
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #14 - Aff

    S3:E6

    For once Winston's complaint to the social office is genuine, and now has a foot that can stun even the most heartless of people into abject silence. Meanwhile, Jack devises a scheme to finally get the attention of his estranged son in Johannesburg. But things go wrong when he actually turns up to see his 'sick' father. Will things come to a climax, or will father and son remain more distant than ever?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  15. undefined Season 6 Episode 1 - Hot Seat
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #15 - Hot Seat

    S6:E1

    Craiglang is in the grip of a hot spell. Jack and Victor have found the perfect place to relax in the park on the ultimate bench. Unfortunately, Tam and Winston have the same idea. Isa receives news about her ex husband Harry that changes her life.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  16. undefined Season 6 Episode 3 - Lights Out
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #16 - Lights Out

    S6:E3

    Craiglang is plunged into eternal darkness when the sub station goes on the blink. Our vulnerable pensioners are to take radical measures to protect themselves from the night crawlers.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  17. undefined Season 6 Episode 2 - Fly Society
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #17 - Fly Society

    S6:E2

    Jack and Victor get a taste of how the other half live when they are mistaken for two socialites by a couple of rich widows. But the gang from Craiglang are not happy at missing out.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  18. undefined Season 6 Episode 7 - One In One Out
    10.0/10(2 votes)

    #18 - One In One Out

    S6:E7

    Tam and Frances enjoy fame and fortune with their new addition but it means baby sitting stints for Jack and Victor which is proving a bit of a strain.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  19. undefined Season 6 Episode 4 - Seconds Out
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #19 - Seconds Out

    S6:E4

    Boabby the barman and Stevie the bookie vie for the attention of the new pizza girl. Jack and Victor are hell bent on getting a free pizza now that their old pal Winston works there.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  20. undefined Season 6 Episode 5 - Hyper
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #20 - Hyper

    S6:E5

    Navid's business is suffering at the hands of the corporate giant Hyperdales and his regular customers loyalty is being put to the test. Meanwhile, Tam is going through some bizarre changes. The drinks are on him!

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  21. undefined Season 6 Episode 6 - Recipe
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #21 - Recipe

    S6:E6

    Jack and Victor discover Pete the Jakey was the inventor of The famous Beefy bake and seek recompense on his behalf. Tam and Frances are having marital problems. Who can offer counsel, Navid?

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  22. undefined Season 5 Episode 1 - Drama
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #22 - Drama

    S5:E1

    Pub-loving pensioners Jack and Victor are set for a headache, as the hit Scottish comedy returns.In the first of a new six-part series, the adventurous oldies risk the mother of all hangovers when they win a trip to a posh whisky distillery, complete with an endless supply of free samples. And fellow OAP Winston looks like losing out to old enemy Stevie the bookie - until racing expert John McCririck arrives to give him a few betting tips.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  23. undefined Season 5 Episode 3 - Smoke On The Water
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #23 - Smoke On The Water

    S5:E3

    Jack arranges a birthday surprise for Victor's 75th - a trip down the river in an inflatable dinghy. The duo are joined on their voyage by Winston, but the relaxing pleasure cruise soon turns into a nightmare.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  24. undefined Season 5 Episode 6 - Saucy
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #24 - Saucy

    S5:E6

    Jack and Victor decide to visit Winston in his new home at the seaside town of Finport - but find the local people are even stranger than those in Craiglang. Tam falls in love with his ex-sister-in-law, a former variety star even more careful with her money than he is.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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  25. undefined Season 5 Episode 2 - A Fresh Lick
    10.0/10(1 votes)

    #25 - A Fresh Lick

    S5:E2

    When Jack and Victor volunteer to redecorate Isa's living room the alterations go a lot further than planned. Meanwhile Boabby's video collection contain a guilty secret.

    Director:N/A
    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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Greg Hemphill Ratings Summary

"Dial A Bus" is the best rated episode written by Greg Hemphill. It scored 10/10 based on 1 votes. It was directed by N/A. It aired on 8/5/2005 and is rated 0.0 points higher than their second-best episode, "Buntin'".