The Best Episodes Written By Greg Hemphill

Episode Rankings

1. #1 Fan Favorite
   

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #1 - Shooglies

   S2:E75/10/2003

   After an unusually expensive meal, Jack and Victor decide to take a literal trip down memory lane, when they visit a new exhibition in the city centre dedicated to the Glasgow of their childhood. They meet an old friend, Frank McCallum. But is he all that he appears to be?

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill
2. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #2 - Dug

   S2:E95/24/2003

   Isa's unwelcome husband returns once more. Jack and Victor have a major falling-out: Victor's son John is as distant and uncaring as ever, while Jack has warm tears in his eyes when his daughter Mary in Canada sends him a video tape of her and the weans. Things are compounded when Jack is invited to fly out to Canada to visit. Will Victor end up on the plane, or have our boys finally had enough of one another? And Winston agrees to pose as Isa's fiancé in order to ward off her husband - but how far is he willing to go to maintain the illusion?

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill
3. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #3 - Cauld

   S1:E39/27/2002

   Winter arrives in Craiglang with a vengeance. Jack and Victor find an old friend of theirs drops dead of the cold - is it time to take part in Winston's nerfarious scheme to steal 'leccy?

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill
4. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #4 - Big Yin

   S3:E45/28/2004

   The Neds (hooligans) begin a reign of terror in Craigland. Jack and Victor contact an old friend to come to town and take matters in his giant-sized hands. If they can just keep him away from the Miduri... Meanwhile, Winston's taking up a valued place at the local supermarket and suddenly finds that Craiglang has become a fair model for Sing Sing...

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill
5. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #5 - Drama

   S5:E16/19/2006

   Pub-loving pensioners Jack and Victor are set for a headache, as the hit Scottish comedy returns.In the first of a new six-part series, the adventurous oldies risk the mother of all hangovers when they win a trip to a posh whisky distillery, complete with an endless supply of free samples. And fellow OAP Winston looks like losing out to old enemy Stevie the bookie - until racing expert John McCririck arrives to give him a few betting tips.

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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6. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #6 - Smoke On The Water

   S5:E37/3/2006

   Jack arranges a birthday surprise for Victor's 75th - a trip down the river in an inflatable dinghy. The duo are joined on their voyage by Winston, but the relaxing pleasure cruise soon turns into a nightmare.

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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7. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #7 - Saucy

   S5:E67/24/2006

   Jack and Victor decide to visit Winston in his new home at the seaside town of Finport - but find the local people are even stranger than those in Craiglang. Tam falls in love with his ex-sister-in-law, a former variety star even more careful with her money than he is.

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill
8. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #8 - A Fresh Lick

   S5:E26/26/2006

   When Jack and Victor volunteer to redecorate Isa's living room the alterations go a lot further than planned. Meanwhile Boabby's video collection contain a guilty secret.

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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9. 

   10.0/10(2 votes)

   #9 - All The Best

   S5:E57/17/2006

   Winston's had enough of Craiglang and decides he wants to live beside the seaside. Jack and Victor become wedding chauffeurs for the day.

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   Writer:Greg Hemphill

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10. 

    10.0/10(2 votes)

    #10 - Hatch

    S4:E58/19/2005

    Jack and Victor are fed up of Isa's constant prying, but the plan they hatch causes shock waves across Craiglang.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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11. 

    10.0/10(2 votes)

    #11 - Wireless

    S4:E27/29/2005

    Jack and Victor take up residence in the hospital as DJs. Navid, however, is about to encounter a more pressing problem.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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12. 

    9.8/10(3 votes)

    #12 - Doactors

    S2:E34/12/2003

    Winston and Tam become love rivals over a gentle, lovely lady at the local library. But which one will win the fair lady's heart? Meanwhile, Jack and Victor are feeling depressed, and there's a new drug on trial at the health centre. They rehearse their scripts for when they get there to convince the doctor, but Jack's 'I'm depressed' face looks more like 'I'm constipated'.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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13. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #13 - Dial A Bus

    S4:E38/5/2005

    Jack and Victor succumb to the lure of the Dial-A-Bus, but this one doesn't stop where they expected.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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14. 

    9.5/10(3 votes)

    #14 - Wummin'

    S2:E24/5/2003

    Winston, a lifetime expert at fiddling the DHSS, takes his game one step-up, in the form of pretty home-helper Mrs. Begg . Our boys are quickly smitten. But can Winston keep up the pretence for long? Meanwhile, Jack and Victor now got their newly-widowed friend, Bert Finlay, to worry about. He's not managing: he walks around town like a jakie and can't even boil an egg for himself. A situation horribly familiar to both the boys, they decide to make sure to do right by their old friend before it's too late.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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15. 

    9.5/10(3 votes)

    #15 - Gairden

    S2:E13/29/2003

    The Neds have colonised the local park and Jack and Victor aren't happy about it. Winston decides to take matters into his own hands. Things aren't helped by the fact that their old pal Ronnie is in the loony bin, so they pose as his brothers to secure his release. But will they make it in time, and will auld Ronnie be up to the challenge of sanity?

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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16. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #16 - Courtin'

    S1:E410/4/2002

    Jack realises how long it's been since his wife died and starts to find new love with a lovely woman in the city centre. But to win the fair lady's heart, a double date is in order. What will Victor do when he sees Barbara's sister, and what will he do when it turns out that all isn't as it seems with Barbara?

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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17. 

    9.5/10(3 votes)

    #17 - Hoaliday

    S3:E15/7/2004

    Jack and Victor kick off series 3 in an opening episode that picks up where the last episode of series 2 left off - the boys are flying to Canada to visit Jack's family. The boys are having a time of it - with a belated dose of jetlag - and take in the marvels of Gutbusters, Niagra Falls, Ice Hockey and tacky souvenirs. Soon the time looms for them to come home - or is it? And, back in Craiglang, there's a new man in Isa's life...

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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18. 

    9.5/10(3 votes)

    #18 - Swottin'

    S3:E25/14/2004

    Jack and Vic feel their lives have become routine to the point of redundancy. Does salvation lie in Glasgow University's course in Medicial Proficiency, or will the lure of a 75p pint be too much? Meanwhile, Boaby's losing customers and can't get his hole in a barrel of fannies. Can a quiz night and a lovely new barmaid be the answer to both problems?

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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19. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #19 - Cairds

    S3:E35/21/2004

    Boaby bars Jack & Vic & Co. from the Clansman. Turning Osprey Heights into a mini Las Vegas, Tam wins Joe's motor-wheelchair. However, plans are afoot to win it back, while Winston's feud with the bookies reaches a hilarious climax...

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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20. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #20 - Oot

    S3:E56/4/2004

    Archie (Sylvester McCoy), an old friend of J & V's, finally has to leave the place where he has been secluded for nearly half a century, never going outside. Now the council are knocking his place down, but are Jack and Victor the best guides to the new century? Winston is experimenting with turning his house into a cinema. Looks like the Towering Inferno's on at Osprey Heights...

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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21. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #21 - Aff

    S3:E66/11/2004

    For once Winston's complaint to the social office is genuine, and now has a foot that can stun even the most heartless of people into abject silence. Meanwhile, Jack devises a scheme to finally get the attention of his estranged son in Johannesburg. But things go wrong when he actually turns up to see his 'sick' father. Will things come to a climax, or will father and son remain more distant than ever?

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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22. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #22 - Lights Out

    S6:E37/26/2007

    Craiglang is plunged into eternal darkness when the sub station goes on the blink. Our vulnerable pensioners are to take radical measures to protect themselves from the night crawlers.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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23. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #23 - Fly Society

    S6:E27/19/2007

    Jack and Victor get a taste of how the other half live when they are mistaken for two socialites by a couple of rich widows. But the gang from Craiglang are not happy at missing out.

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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24. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #24 - Hyper

    S6:E58/9/2007

    Navid's business is suffering at the hands of the corporate giant Hyperdales and his regular customers loyalty is being put to the test. Meanwhile, Tam is going through some bizarre changes. The drinks are on him!

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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25. 

    9.5/10(2 votes)

    #25 - Recipe

    S6:E68/16/2007

    Jack and Victor discover Pete the Jakey was the inventor of The famous Beefy bake and seek recompense on his behalf. Tam and Frances are having marital problems. Who can offer counsel, Navid?

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    Writer:Greg Hemphill

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