After a couple of weeks of dating her, Joey introduces his new girlfriend Roxy Martin to the family. Roxy is a comedian, like Joey. Roxy is nervous about meeting the family, and as a result, she can't think of anything funny to say. After Roxy meets the family, Jesse schedules Roxy to perform on comedy night at the Smash Club, where Roxy adds insulting jokes about the family to her comedy routine. At home, after returning Little Sid to its owner Big Sid, the girls are given a choice of one item from Big Sid's store for free, and this leads to arguments between the girls, who each want a different item. D.J. wants to get a big-screen TV, and Stephanie wants to get a Karaoke machine. The decisive vote is left up to Michelle.

Joey's Funny Valentine

John Stamos

Bob Saget

Dave Coulier

Candace Cameron Bure

Jodie Sweetin

Lori Loughlin

Blake Tuomy-Wilhoit

Dylan Tuomy-Wilhoit

Andrea Barber

Mary-Kate Olsen

Ashley Olsen

Scott Weinger

The Last Dance

The Test

D.J., Stephanie, Michelle, and Kimmy have returned home from a summer at Camp Lakota. Michelle tells Jesse that she no longer wants Jesse to call her "Munchkin", which Jesse has affectionately called her for years, because everyone at camp gave her the nickname "Trailmix", and she likes it. Danny feels hurt when D.J., Stephanie, and Michelle act like they didn't miss the family one bit while they were at Camp Lakota. Upstairs, Stephanie and D.J. are surprised that Michelle has brought home a rabbit named Gilbert.

It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

Danny is shocked when D.J. tells him that her classmate Kathy Santoni is pregnant, and Danny feels uncomfortable when D.J. says she's going to go to Steve's new apartment to watch TV with him. Danny tells D.J. to be home by 11:00pm, which is her curfew. Danny gives D.J. permission to go to Steve's apartment because he is told that Kimmy will be with D.J. at the apartment. What Danny doesn't know is that circumstances have prevented Kimmy from being able to be with D.J. the whole time at Steve's apartment. Later, it's past midnight, and D.J. is still not home yet. Danny calls Kimmy, who gives him the address of Steve's new apartment. A few minutes later, Danny knocks on Steve's door, but there is no answer because Steve and D.J. are asleep beside each other on the couch. They fell asleep while watching the Arnold Schwarzenegger movie "The Terminator".

The Apartment

Like Stephanie and D.J. once did, Michelle becomes a member of a local soccer team that Joey is now the head coach of. Danny and Jesse are overly excited about it, and in her first game, Michelle kicks the ball the wrong way and scores the winning goal for the opposing team. This has Michelle wanting to leave the team because she feels like she can no longer face her teammates, who chewed her out about costing them a game. Joey explains to Jesse and Danny that if they would have let Joey do his job as head coach and not put so much pressure on Michelle and made her so nervous, Michelle would have felt more comfortable in the game and maybe a little less prone to mistakes. As this is going on, Stephanie is videotaping a day in the life of the Tanners as a project for school.

Wrong-Way Tanner

Nicky and Alex are having behavior problems that are adversely affecting the lives of those who love them. Nicky and Alex even destroy Michelle's science project, which was a model of the nine planets. An angry Michelle lets on that Jesse and Becky should start making Nicky and Alex behave, so Jesse takes the twins to their bedroom for their first punishment, which is a timeout, meaning that they're grounded to their room for a portion of the day. After doing this, Jesse feels guilty when the twins call him "mean daddy" for this, and a "mean daddy" is the last thing Jesse wants to be. Becky reassures Jesse that the twins obviously didn't know that what they said to Jesse was hurtful. Meanwhile, Danny, who fears that the girls are too finicky to like Vicky's cooking, bribes Stephanie and Michelle into giving Vicky compliments at the dinner table so they won't make Vicky feel hurt.

Tough Love

For two weeks, Stephanie has been in 6th grade at DiMaggio Junior High School. Her old friends all attend different schools now, and Stephanie is desperate to make new friends, and she meets a group of 7th graders led by Gia Mahan, and they want Stephanie to smoke with them. That's why Stephanie is not sure that these girls are her type of friends. Meanwhile, Jesse and Joey are having a special on their radio show, "Rush Hour Renegades", where they have brought in D.J., Steve, and Kimmy to talk to teenagers who call in to seek advice.

Fast Friends

Jesse is shocked to discover that he has inherited the Smash Club from Buzz Markel. Jesse and the Rippers played gigs at the Smash Club more than virtually any other band, but the place has been closed down for the past couple of years. Jesse will become the owner only if he can reopen the club. If he can't do it, the club will be turned into a parking lot. After receiving some ideas from D.J., Kimmy, Stephanie, and Steve, Jesse decides to reopen the Smash Club as a place where anyone can come to hear cool new music from new bands -- no age limit like the Smash Club had before, when people had to be 21 or older to get in. Jesse's plans also state that no alcoholic beverages will be served in "The New Smash Club". Jesse and Joey head to the Smash Club, which is, of course, a mess.

Smash Club: The Next Generation

Michelle, who is in 2nd grade, is growing up faster than Danny is accepting. Danny still treats Michelle like a baby, and Michelle has had enough of that, so even though she doesn't want to have to get mad at Danny, she angrily tells Danny to stop treating her like a baby. Danny realizes that he needs to let go and start letting his kids grow up as they get older, so Danny talks to Michelle and promises to stop treating Michelle like a baby. Meanwhile, Jesse is overwhelmed by the fact that he has so many decisions to make about needs for the Smash Club, which he hasn't opened yet.

High Anxiety

Jesse is now ready to reopen the Smash Club, and Danny, Joey, Becky, D.J., Kimmy, Stephanie, and Michelle will be helping Jesse at the club on this special night. Jesse wants absolutely nothing to go wrong, so he starts acting cranky around everyone. The opening could be a disaster when Jesse ends up locked in the Smash Club's storage room with Kimmy. As Danny, Joey, Becky, and the girls run the Smash Club the best they can while they think Jesse and Kimmy haven't showed up yet, Kimmy helps Jesse realize that Jesse was wrong to be cranky around everyone, and this teaches Jesse that if he wants to be a good boss, then he shouldn't treat his employees the way he treated Danny, Joey, Becky, and the girls. Jesse and Kimmy free themselves from the storage room, and the club has a fairly successful grand opening. At home, Jesse apologizes for the way he treated Kimmy and the family.

Another Opening, Another No Show

Michelle and her friends are angry at their favorite TV character "Rigby the Rhino". After seeing a commercial advertising a big, plush "action Rigby", Michelle and each of her friends order one, but instead of receiving a big, plush Rigby, they each receive a tiny plastic Rigby -- a clear case of false advertisement. Joey takes Michelle and her friends, along with their tiny plastic Rigbys, to Bayview Mall, where Rigby is making an appearance, and there is a large group of kids and their parents who are there to see Rigby. Joey, Michelle, and her friends don't want these kids to be swindled by a commercial that was a lie, so they show their tiny plastic Rigbys to these kids and warn these kids that the commercial was a lie.

The Day of the Rhino

While at a local public library, Stephanie sees an attractive blonde haired girl planting a kiss on Steve's cheek. Stephanie doesn't want to say anything to D.J. until she's sure Steve is seeing another girl. That's why Stephanie and Kimmy break into Steve's apartment, so they can investigate. Stephanie and Kimmy are nailed when D.J. and Steve show up. The girl who kissed Steve on the cheek was his cousin Edie, who kissed him out of friendship, proving that Steve is not seeing someone else. D.J. goes ballistic and tells a stunned Stephanie to stay out of her life, because D.J. feels that by breaking into Steve's apartment, Stephanie has reached a new low when it comes to invading D.J.'s privacy.

The Prying Game

Michelle tells the family that her bicycle is missing, so the family starts a search for it. Later on, Danny, Jesse, and Joey have each brought home a bicycle that looks like Michelle's, but it turns out that none of the three bikes belong to Michelle. At the same time, the disappearances of the three bikes is being investigated by Crime Catchers, a neighborhood watch program led by Mrs. Carruthers, who works at the school Michelle goes to. It turns out that Michelle had forgotten that she left her bike at her friend Derek Boyd's house.

The Bicycle Thief

In playgroups, 2-year-old Nicky and Alex refuse to play with anyone except for each other. Jesse is too stubborn to admit that this is a problem, until he and Becky attend a support group for parents of twins. After the visit with the support group, Jesse later admits that he didn't want to acknowledge the problem because he was afraid that he may discover that he's somehow the cause of it and he doesn't want to do anything to mess up Nicky and Alex's lives, but Jesse was proven wrong at the support group. Meanwhile, D.J. gets a traffic ticket for "obstruction of vision" when Kimmy decides to air out her socks by sticking her feet out the window of the car. D.J. wants to keep the ticket a secret from Danny because she's afraid Danny will never let her drive the car again. Stephanie and Michelle use this information to their advantage to force D.J. to let them borrow clothes from her.

Support Your Local Parents

Joey is the host of the test pilot episode of a game show called "The Perfect Couple", a show that would remind you of the Newlywed Game. The three couples on the game are a dating couple (D.J. and Steve), an engaged couple (Danny and Vicky), and a married couple (Jesse and Becky). While everyone is out, doing the new show, Stephanie and Michelle have their work cut out for them as they babysit Nicky and Alex. Vicky is out of town, so she can't be on the show with Danny, and Estelle, the woman who substitutes for Vicky, seems to know Danny all too well, and as a result of the show, D.J. thinks she and Steve don't know each other well enough. When Vicky shows up at the studio that "The Perfect Couple" was taped in, she tells Danny that her lifelong dream of being a network news anchor has come true -- she has accepted a job as a network news anchor in New York City.

The Perfect Couple

Stephanie's classmate Jamie, who plays guitar with some friends in a band called "Human Pudding", asks Stephanie out on a date to the Smash Club, and Stephanie excitedly agrees to go to the Smash Club with Jamie. Stephanie's classmate Gia Mahan is not as excited, because Gia also has her eyes on Jamie, and she's not about to let Stephanie have him that easily. In order to make Jamie cancel his date with Stephanie, Gia spreads a false rumor at school that Stephanie wouldn't have any dates if she didn't pay guys to date her. Gia's plan works, and Jamie breaks the date, so Stephanie gets even with Gia by hanging up a blowup of Gia's awful report card in the hallway. This makes Gia feel even more hurt than Stephanie felt when Gia spread the false rumor about Stephanie. Noticing how hurt Gia feels makes Stephanie feel guilty.

Is It True About Stephanie?

It's the day before D.J.'s SAT, and she's so nervous about it that when she goes to sleep that night, she has a nightmare about it in which everything possible goes wrong: D.J. oversleeps on the day of the test and is late, and Ms. Twitchel, a neighbor D.J. yelled at, is the teacher, Danny and Becky come by to broadcast the test live, and with too many last-minute changes to the test, D.J. fails the test with not even her name written correctly. When D.J. wakes up from this nightmare, Danny convinces her that she doesn't have to be so nervous about the SAT, and her teacher turns out to be a much friendlier teacher named Mrs. Moffatt.

In a special episode: Jesse's grandfather Iorgos "Papouli" Katsopolis is back from Greece for another visit. The family finds it pleasant to have Papouli around. One morning during Papouli's visit, everyone goes to wake him up after Michelle has gone to school -- only to discover that Papouli has died in his sleep. His death was caused by heart failure. When Michelle arrives home from school later that day, Danny tells her that Papouli has died. Michelle is devastated, and it turns out that only one person can comfort Michelle, and that person is Jesse, who is taking it just as hard. Kimmy and D.J. argue over a pair of sunglasses, but Papouli's death helps them realize that friendship is too important for them to argue over a pair of sunglasses.

Jesse has returned home from Greece, where he attended Papouli's funeral, and he has brought his cousin Stavros home with him. What Jesse doesn't know is that Stavros is a womanizing con artist. Stavros (also played by John Stamos) swindles Joey out of a watch and $20, makes a pass at Becky, gets Danny a $65 parking ticket, and Stavros also makes D.J. pay for an awful-smelling goat pizza that Stavros had the money for all along. When everyone tries to tell Jesse what kind of man Stavros is, Jesse refuses to believe them. The Smash Club is the setting for Stavros's latest scam, in which he says that a severe mudslide has occurred in his hometown in Greece and he is raising money at the Smash Club for his hometown's recovery from the mudslide. Becky and the girls discover that there was no mudslide, and that Stavros plans to take the money -- and Becky -- on an airplane flight to Florida with him.

Kissing Cousins

Steve goes to a seminar in Los Angeles with his film class, and D.J. doesn't seem as excited as Steve is. A few days later, D.J. tells Becky that she's worried about her relationship with Steve. That night, Steve calls from Los Angeles, and he sounds like he's having a blast. D.J. goes mountain climbing on Eagle Mountain with Kimmy and her boyfriend Keanu. A few days later, Steve returns to San Francisco from Los Angeles, and he thinks D.J. is acting like she didn't miss him. After an argument with D.J., Steve goes home. That night, D.J. tells Danny that it feels like she and Steve are not on the same wavelength anymore. On the next day, D.J. takes Steve to Eagle Mountain, where they have a long talk, and they decide to break up because they are no longer as passionate about their relationship as they once were.

Love on the Rocks

After being insulted by a boy named Kenny, Michelle decides that she wants to be in the annual downhill soapbox derby championship, and she gets Becky to help her build a soapbox car. Michelle feels like dropping out of the race when she hears comments about how girls shouldn't be in the race. Becky talks Michelle into not quitting, and the elimination heats begin. In the final race, it's Michelle against Kenny, who has never lost a race -- and Kenny gets what he deserves when Michelle races past him and wins the championship. Meanwhile, Stephanie gives Joey ballet lessons as a way to help Joey improve his skills in ice hockey, and Joey ends up accidentally ripping the seat of his pants.

Michelle a la Carte

In Michelle's class on parent volunteer day, a new student is introduced. It's Michelle's best friend Teddy, who moved to Texas a little more than a year ago. Michelle is thrilled that Teddy and his family have moved back to San Francisco. When Michelle tries to be a best friend to both Teddy and Denise, she ends up with no friend at all, until Danny helps Michelle, Teddy, and Denise realize that it's possible for someone to have two best friends. Meanwhile, on "Rush Hour Renegades", Joey and his girlfriend Roxy Martin make Jesse feel like the odd man out by not letting Jesse get a word in edgewise on the show.

Be Your Own Best Friend

For the first time since Danny and Vicky's breakup and D.J. and Steve's breakup, D.J. and Danny are both back in the dating pool. Stephanie has arranged a blind date for D.J., and Danny takes Becky's suggestion to date a TV camera operator named Bernadette. But then Danny and D.J. inadvertently go to the same restaurant with their dates, and D.J.'s and Danny's partners take off together. D.J. then meets a friendly waiter, and helping an old lady in the restaurant pays off for Danny. Meanwhile, Jesse prepares Nicky and Alex to celebrate Mother's Day, and Nicky and Alex start celebrating a day early.

A Date with Fate

Michelle's favorite part of school, the arts program, has been cancelled because of budget cuts. At a PTA meeting, Danny and Joey stand up for the arts program, and Danny nominates Joey for PTA president. His opponent, Mrs. Carruthers, won't give up without a fight, but with the help of Denise's uncle Richard, Joey becomes the co-president of the PTA with Mrs. Carruthers, and they decide that the arts program, which is a favorite among a lot of the students, should be brought back to the school.

Too Little Richard Too Late

When the family starts complaining that there is not enough room in the house for 9 people, they consider finding other places to live. Millionaire industrialist Lou Bond shows up wanting to buy the house from Danny, because Mr. Bond used to live in the house before the Tanners moved in years ago, and it's the house that Mr. Bond grew up in. Michelle is the only one who is against the idea of selling the house and moving out of it, so she tries everything to stop the sale from happening. With the help of her friends, Michelle succeeds. Everyone realizes that this house has been a part of the family for years. It's more than just walls and a roof -- it's their lives, where they have had so many good times together. With this to think about, Danny decides to not sell the house.

A House Divided

After the death of his wife, Danny enlists his best friend and his brother-in-law to help raise his three daughters, D.J., Stephanie, and Michelle.

Joey's Funny Valentine

Seasons8

Season 7 Episodes24

Cast12

Discussion

Episode Summary