The Worst Episodes of Phoenix Nights

Episode Rankings

1. #1 Worst Episode
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   8.1/10(126 votes)

   #1 - Ladies' Night

   S2:E59/5/2002

   It's Ladies' Night, Brian's stocked up on Bacardi and Paddy can't wait for the bored housewives to arrive. Max has his eye on a different chassis but he knows she's out of his league.

   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown
2. 

   8.2/10(192 votes)

   #2 - Opening Night

   S1:E11/14/2001

   The Phoenix Club is re-opening tonight with the help of Roy “It's The Way I Tell 'Em” Walker and Brian and the crew have to make sure everything runs smoothly which isn't helped by a Nazi bandit, singing builders, short circuit a racist folk band and Max and Paddy. Opening Night is sure to be great.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown
3. 

   8.2/10(131 votes)

   #3 - Brian Gets Everyone Back Together

   S2:E18/8/2002

   The club has burnt down (rival Den Perry did it) and Brian has been barred from holding a licence due to safety shortcuts and insurance fiddles. But, inspired by old mate Hoss Cartwright who runs Blackpool's La Ponderosa, Brian has plans for a revival. He needs the help of his former employees, especially Jerry St Clair, who has been reduced to the role of singing salesman at Asda.

   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown
4. 

   8.2/10(130 votes)

   #4 - Crimetime

   S2:E38/22/2002

   To get publicity, Brian arranges for the Phoenix Club to be featured on TV show Crimetime (presented by Stuart Maconie), recreating the night of the blaze. It turns into a blatant plug for the club – and features Jerry's performance of Reach For The Stars. Meanwhile, the Chinese cooks are stir frying everything and the seedy Spencer (Daniel Kitson) is hired as a barman.

   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown
5. 

   8.3/10(166 votes)

   #5 - Wild West Night

   S1:E21/21/2001

   A drunken horse, a dead pensioner - and that's before they've had the wild west night. It's business as usual at the Phoenix Club.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown
6. 

   8.3/10(142 votes)

   #6 - Comedy Robot Wars

   S1:E52/11/2001

   The Phoenix club has hit rock bottom. Can a new alternative comedy night and Robot Wars save the day? Probably not...

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown
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7. 

   8.4/10(152 votes)

   #7 - Singles Night

   S1:E42/4/2001

   It's Single's Night at the Phoenix! Brian runs over a lady's foot with his wheelchair which leads to sparks flying between the two.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown
8. 

   8.5/10(141 votes)

   #8 - Talent Trek Finals

   S1:E62/18/2001

   Things are finally looking up for Brian Potter in this final episode when the Talent Trek grand final comes to the Phoenix Club. But at what cost to Jerry St Claire?

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Unknown
9. 

   8.5/10(126 votes)

   #9 - Quiz

   S2:E48/29/2002

   Everyone except Brian seems to know Wednesday is 'Jerry's Free and Easy Night'. So Jerry is furious when he finds Brian's organised a quiz night with a year's supply of lager up for grabs.

   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown

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   Director:Peter Kay

   Writer:Unknown
10. 

    8.6/10(161 votes)

    #10 - Disco Inferno

    S1:E31/28/2001

    Will fire and safety officer Keith Lard succeed in closing the Phoenix Club, or will Brian Potter keep it open in time for the sell-out psychic that is Clinton Baptiste?

    Director:Unknown

    Writer:Unknown

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    Director:Unknown

    Writer:Unknown
11. 

    8.7/10(136 votes)

    #11 - Family Fun Day

    S2:E28/15/2002

    Brian is in dire need of cash for his refurbishment so he decides to hold a family fun day in the club car park. They've got fairground rides and face-painting - what could possibly go wrong?

    Director:Peter Kay

    Writers:Peter Kay, Neil Fitzmaurice

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    Director:Peter Kay

    Writers:Peter Kay, Neil Fitzmaurice
12. 

    8.8/10(131 votes)

    #12 - Stars in Their Eyes

    S2:E69/12/2002

    The Phoenix has risen and the punters are back. Brian isn't surprised when the brewery decides to come and celebrate his victory and throws a gala Stars in Their Eyes show.

    Director:Peter Kay

    Writer:Unknown

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    Director:Peter Kay

    Writer:Unknown