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The Worst Episodes of The Bill

Every episode of The Bill ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of The Bill!

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The daily lives of the men and women at Sun Hill Police Station as they fight crime on the streets of London. From bomb threats to armed robbery and drug raids to the routine demands

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  1. #1 Worst Episode
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    The Bill Season 1 Episode 1 - Funny Ol' Business: Cops and Robbers
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #1 - Funny Ol' Business: Cops and Robbers

    S1:E1

    Carver is still getting used to life at Sun Hill, as he continues to raise his popularity level amongst the other officers. Meanwhile, Brownlow has ordered the uniform relief onto the streets of Sun Hill, to lower the increase of crime in the area. Carver attempts to get into Brownlow's good books by capturing a car thief. Meanwhile, Galloway is desperate to get some results on a breaking and entering spree. When flying squad detective Frank "Tommy" Burnside arrives asking Galloway for help, after one of his snouts is arrested, it soon becomes clear that there's history between him and Cryer.

    Director:Peter Cregeen
    Writer:Geoff McQueen

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  2. The Bill Season 1 Episode 2 - A Friend in Need
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    #2 - A Friend in Need

    S1:E2

    When a spate of bomb hoaxes begins to threaten peace and harmony in Sun Hill, Brownlow becomes eager to find the hoax callers and stop chaos from breaking out. Meanwhile, Galloway bets Cryer he is the perfect man to solve the case, recruiting Roach and Dashwood to help him. Cryer gives Carver the responsibility of showing a newly qualified officer, Higgins, the ways of Sun Hill - but a run-in with a local drunk who later accuses Carver of stealing his wallet leaves every officer on the uniform relief wondering if Carver is capable enough to do the job without bringing the social aspect into disrepute.

    Director:Peter Cregeen
    Writer:Unknown

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  3. The Bill Season 1 Episode 3 - Clutching at Straws
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    #3 - Clutching at Straws

    S1:E3

    When a gang of thugs use violence to extort money from local youths, Brownlow takes a hands off approach - and claims that he would rather play golf than try to save the residents of the 'dump' of an estate. However, Carver is determined to improve the situation on the estate, by proposing the re-opening of a local youth club, whilst getting to the bottom of who is attacking the loyal youth. Meanwhile, Cryer and Galloway investigate a series of attempted child abductions involving young girls. They are unaware that their prime suspect - Simon Doleman - was talking to Carver just hours before - and has since been on a violent rampage, even attempting to rape his own mother.

    Director:Christopher Hodson
    Writer:Unknown

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  4. The Bill Season 1 Episode 4 - Long Odds
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #4 - Long Odds

    S1:E4

    P.C. Litten recognises a photo of a wanted armed robber, but takes the information to D.I. Galloway instead of Sgt. Cryer, and gets into trouble with both men. Meanwhile, a gang of thugs is robbing local shopkeepers, and P.C. Edwards purses a mugger into a derelict building and is trapped when the floor collapses beneath him.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Geoff McQueen

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  5. The Bill Season 1 Episode 5 - It's Not Such a Bad Job After All
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    #5 - It's Not Such a Bad Job After All

    S1:E5

    The discovery of a body of a teenage suicide leaves a bitter taste in Ackland's mouth, and finding herself being drawn into a seedy world of pornography, drugs and prostitution, Ackland considers leaving Sun Hill for good after the situation is made by worse by Galloway, who gives her a hard time over calling him out of bed on a Sunday morning. When it is discovered that the girl was three months pregnant at the time of her death, Galloway goes all out to make sure the investigation doesn't drag the girl's name through the mud, and her parents are protected from finding out what their daughter was really like.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  6. The Bill Season 1 Episode 6 - The Drugs Raid
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #6 - The Drugs Raid

    S1:E6

    After a residents' meeting complaining about the drug problem on their estate, DI Galloway mentions that he had heard that an old illegal club has reopened in an abandoned theatre complex - this time dealing drugs. He asks a parent, Tombo Robinson, who used to be involved in the club, if he will infiltrate it to confirm Galloway's suspicions. Tombo reluctantly agrees, and meets with Galloway to tell him that a huge drug deal is going down that afternoon. Galloway quickly arranges a warrant, and sets about organising a huge raid on the club. The raid runs according to plan, but Tombo is stabbed by a dealer as he tries to let the police into the building. PC Edwards and Carver give chase to the dealer, but are alarmed when the suspect speeds off in a car bearing diplomatic plates. Galloway checks up on Tombo in hospital, and is shocked to discover that he has died and was a heroin addict. Returning to the station, Galloway is furious when Ch. Supt. Brownlow, a Home Office representative,

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  7. The Bill Season 1 Episode 7 - A Dangerous Breed
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #7 - A Dangerous Breed

    S1:E7

    PC Dave Litten is on secondment to CID, and is desperate to impress his boss, DI Roy Galloway. Galloway and Litten are about to have a meal at the local pub when a call comes through that a valuable necklace has been stolen from a local aristocrat, Lord Barstow-Smythe. Traffic problems hold them back as they race across Sun Hill trying to get there before the ""woodentops"". With Galloway and DS Roach busy, Litten talks to a local reporter and ends up mentioned in the local paper. Shortly afterwards, he is contacted by a mysterious stranger who offers to locate the burglers if Litten can convince Barstow-Smythe's insurance company to pay him the reward up-front. The Stranger then sets up two young lads to take the fall for the theft, and Litten proudly arrests them. Galloway recognises the MO of the case as that of a notorious conman, and lambasts Litten for his stupidity.

    Director:Christopher Hodson
    Writer:Unknown

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  8. The Bill Season 1 Episode 8 - Rough in the Afternoon
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #8 - Rough in the Afternoon

    S1:E8

    PC Carver and PC Edwards are called to a domestic and are informed by the neighbour that a child was taken by his father. Meanwhile, the mother has turned up at the station to report the abduction in person.

    Director:Christopher Hodson
    Writer:Unknown

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  9. The Bill Season 1 Episode 9 - Burning the Books
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #9 - Burning the Books

    S1:E9

    After a briefcase is found by a young car thief, Det. Insp. Galloway thinks he can finally nick the 'Arthur Daley' of Sun Hill. Because of car problems he is unable to interview his chief suspect. After a warehouse fire that is supposed to convince Galloway the porn magazines were destroyed, they arrive back at the station just as the van carrying them drives away - having been parked at the back entrance for 24 hours.

    Director:Peter Cregeen
    Writer:Unknown

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  10. The Bill Season 1 Episode 10 - Death of a Cracksman
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #10 - Death of a Cracksman

    S1:E10

    Alfie Mullins is a non-returned prisoner, not a dangerous prisoner as reported. He is an old-fashioned safe-cracker who, just as he is returning to the prison, is approached by one of a gang of thieves who want Alfie to open a safe they pinched. While they are talking Alfie is accidentally killed. The safe is rigged to explode by remote control which P.C. Carver accidentally sets off when he uses his radio.

    Director:Christopher Hodson
    Writer:Unknown

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  11. The Bill Season 1 Episode 11 - The Sweet Smell of Failure
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #11 - The Sweet Smell of Failure

    S1:E11

    A tip in a counterfeit perfume case pulls in two very old aged pensioners who appear to have been pinching things since WWII. But after leading Carver and Ackland in a merry chase it turns out they aren't the real culprits.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  12. The Bill Season 3 Episode 1 - The New Order of Things
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #12 - The New Order of Things

    S3:E1

    Sgts. Peters and Penny apprehend a man standing outside the station waiting to attack P.C. Muswell (who had left the force six months previously). P.C. Jim Carver begins his CID training by working on an all night obbo with D.S. Ted Roach. Due to Carver's inexperience and Roach's lax attitude, they both miss a flatbed trailer stealing a digger from a building site. Roach and Carver follow up their suspiscions about the site security guard, and find he has stolen the equipment. Back at Sun Hill, D.I. Roy Galloway is being investigated by the Home Office for allegedly forcing a confession from a murder suspect under duress at his last posting. Galloway is cleared of wrongdoing due to lack of evidence, but Ch. Supt. Brownlow warns him that his old-school policing methods may be his undoing. In a suprising turn of events, one of P.C. Reg Hollis's rare walks on the beat with W.P.C. June Ackland leads to him apprehending an armed gunman single-handedly from the Sun Hill D.H.S.S. office. W.P.

    Director:Michael Ferguson
    Writer:Geoff McQueen

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  13. The Bill Season 3 Episode 2 - Some You Win, Some You Lose
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #13 - Some You Win, Some You Lose

    S3:E2

    Ch. Supt. Brownlow and D.I. Galloway lead a massive raid on a drug den on a local council estate which escalates into a full-blown riot, but half a million pounds worth of crack cocaine is recovered. P.C. Melvin loses a handcuffed prisoner in the confusion, but he is arrested by P.C. Hollis when he turns up at the station asking for his handcuffs to be removed. The operation is down to D.C. Dashwood, whose snout is feeding them information on the main drug dealer. Meeting with the snout to get the location of the main drug lab, Dashwood is alarmed when P.C. Carver recognises his informant as Dougie Gardiner. C.I.D. raid the location given to Dashwood by Gardiner, but find nothing except a student squat. Desperate to arrest the dealer, and furious with Dashwood for lying about his snout, Galloway stakes out the dealer's Range Rover in a car park, despite Brownlow insisting he end the operation. When a borough councillor complains to Insp. Kite about the estate raid, it is discovered tha

    Director:Peter Cregeen
    Writer:Unknown

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  14. The Bill Season 3 Episode 3 - Brownie Points
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #14 - Brownie Points

    S3:E3

    P.C. Reg Hollis has been nominated for the position of the station's Federation Rep. He's sure he's a shoo-in, but P.C. Shaw tells him W.P.C. Ackland has applied as well. A D.A.C. visits Sun Hill at the same time as a brownie pack. The ""Tom Squad"" is out in force, cracking down on prostitution in Sun Hill. Due to the VIP visitor, Shaw and Edwards are unable to process the ladies they have arrested, and sit with them in the van until the D.A.C. has left the building. P.C. Carver goes to warn a prostitute, Shirley, about the crackdown, as she is a snout for D.I. Galloway, but is he is stopped by P.C. Edwards and P.C. Shaw who tease him about curb-crawling. D.S. Ted Roach and P.C. Yorkie Smith go to a case conference with social workers when it is suspected a young girl is being assaulted by her mother. Roach doesn't seem interested as he thinks social workers are useless, but once the meeting is over, Roach organises a raid to take the little girl into protective custody.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  15. The Bill Season 3 Episode 4 - Missing, Presumed Dead
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #15 - Missing, Presumed Dead

    S3:E4

    There's been a shooting, but none of the neighbours seem to have witnessed anything. While chasing a possible suspect, Sgt. Bob Cryer hits a pedestrian. During door to door inquiries P.C. Yorkie Smith discovers a man with exotic animals including snakes, owls and a crocodile in his bathtub. D.S. Roach is attacked by some thugs, and the next day tries to beat them with an iron bar until P.C. Carver stops him. His attackers are later kneecapped as a message to D.I. Galloway as to who really is the law on the manor.

    Director:Michael Ferguson
    Writer:Unknown

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  16. The Bill Season 3 Episode 5 - Domestics
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #16 - Domestics

    S3:E5

    Residents take action against a women's refuge in their area, while P.C. Yorkie Smith gives advice to the husband of a woman at the refuge. As D.I. Galloway gets tough with his detectives about the clear up rates of burglaries in the area, W.P.C. Martella and P.C. Edwards pull in a man suspected of three burglaries. P.C. Edwards is getting a hard time because of his impending marriage.

    Director:Peter Cregeen
    Writer:Unknown

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  17. The Bill Season 3 Episode 6 - What Are Little Boys Made Of?
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    #17 - What Are Little Boys Made Of?

    S3:E6

    A boy causes a bus accident by throwing a milk bottle at it. He has 6 siblings. P.C.Frank marks bikes for children. A bike with the wrong postcode is stolen. Shaw has a car accident and some booze in the car gets broken and then Ackland drops another box. An old lady, conned out of five pounds, turns out to be one of a number of elderly people targeted by a group of children.

    Director:Peter Duguid
    Writer:Unknown

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  18. The Bill Season 3 Episode 7 - Blind Alleys, Clogged Roads
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    #18 - Blind Alleys, Clogged Roads

    S3:E7

    P.C. Jim Carver is sent to the morgue to investigate a suspiscious drowning. The victim has clearly been planted with several items such as theatre tickets, badly-fitting clothes and an odd suicide note. D.S. Roach has a theory it's an assassination by the British secret service, meanwhile trying to get permission to conduct an obbo from an office building. D.I. Roy Galloway and D.C. Mike Dashwood are reprimanded by a judge for not bringing all their evidence in a fraud case to the court. They race back to Sun Hill in the recess to retrieve the documents, but on the way back, Galloway runs into a black cab. An argument ensues, and Galloway nicks the cabbie for breach of the peace. Half the cabbies in London blockade the station in protest. P.C. Nick Shaw is slashed with a knife when breaking up a fight between two brothers-in-law, but Sgt. Penny refuses to charge the suspect. An Asian man arrives at the station to report continued harrassment, and a young boy is brought in for graffiti

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  19. The Bill Season 3 Episode 8 - Double Trouble
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #19 - Double Trouble

    S3:E8

    D.I. Galloway wants eight men for an identity parade after an attack on a woman. They run into a mob of football supporters who are ""persuaded"" to help them out. P.C. Melvin helps a lady who has locked herself out of her car. CIB (Complaints Investigation Bureau) arrives at the station and none of the early shift are allowed to leave. Turns out to be an allegation of a copper pocketing a parking fine. Nerves are frayed on the relief, particularly those of P.C. Nick Shaw and W.P.C. June Ackland who come under particular scrutiny as they were on patrol at the time. Shaw is in strife for not declaring Ackland as a passenger in his panda car. As Ackland and Shaw are interviewed, another report of the bent coppers comes in, and CID arrest a mechanic from the police garage and his girlfriend who were posing as police officers and pocketing on-the-spot fines. P.C. Stamp spills a cup of coffee on the P.C. Patel's computer keyboard causing Patel to lose all the work he has done.

    Director:Michael Ferguson
    Writer:Unknown

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  20. The Bill Season 3 Episode 9 - Sun Hill Karma
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #20 - Sun Hill Karma

    S3:E9

    Martella applies for a position in the Bermuda police force, but after being punched during a fight, and failing to prevent a suicide jumper, she feels she is not up to the job and withdraws her application. Roach investigates a fight at a hostel for drunks. Patel investigates another racial attack. During followup, Carver is worried about himself not liking Asians. Penny has started yoga and thinks everyone else should do it too.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  21. The Bill Season 3 Episode 10 - Skipper
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #21 - Skipper

    S3:E10

    W.P.C. June Ackland's father is dying in hospital. P.C. Taffy Edwards is given traffic duty after arriving late for parade. P.C. Jim Carver gets beaten up in a bus queue. Sgt. Cryer and P.C. Patel investigate an alleged rape. Insp. Kite is set up and sent to collect mud samples because of a suspected radioactive leak.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  22. The Bill Season 3 Episode 11 - Overnight Stay
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #22 - Overnight Stay

    S3:E11

    Half the relief, including CID, are at a hotel guarding a sequestered jury in a gangland murder trial. There are several attempts to spook the jury over the course of the night. D.S. Roach and W.P.C. Martella clash when she catches him chatting up a female juror and he accuses her of falling asleep on the job. P.C. Carver and D.C. Dashwood end up in the swimming pool after chasing a woman who was acting suspisciously in the car park through the hotel. She is arrested but refuses to speak, and a major from the Bomb Squad is called in when her bag is found, but it contains a severed hand. Distraught at the death of her father, W.P.C. Ackland gets drunk in the hotel bar. She is found by Sgts. Cryer and Penny, and put in the sauna to sober up. When she recovers, Ackland spots a suspiscious man checking into the hotel. D.I. Galloway leads a raid on the man's room, and breaks up an IRA cell conducting an arms deal. Back at Sun Hill, Insp. Kite deals with a serial nuisance confessing to bigam

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown

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  23. The Bill Season 3 Episode 12 - Not Without Cause
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    #23 - Not Without Cause

    S3:E12

    Sgt. Penny is asked by a landlord to talk to a lady on the top floor who is keeping cats. He is shot through the door after finding out his radio doesn't work. When Penny doesn't respond to radio calls, the station is worried about him and organises a search party. The landlord turns up at the station and talks to D.I. Galloway who doesn't make the connection. Insp. Kite nicks four people for breach of peace that he caused. A suspected poisoning of chocolate bars is traced to a supermarket.

    Director:Peter Cregeen
    Writer:Unknown

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  24. The Bill Season 4 Episode 1 - Light Duties
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #24 - Light Duties

    S4:E1

    Recently promoted to CID, D.C. Carver is feeling seasick while he and D.S. Roach work on a case on the police launch. The River Police fish the body of a murdered informant out of the Thames, but Roach is furious when the case is taken over by two detectives from Scotland Yard. P.C. Taffy Edwards and Stamp attend an incident with an unconcious elderly man who has a very protective dog. A woman offers to help, but Stamp tells her to move along. Stamp is horrified when the woman arrives at Sun Hill as the new uniformed Inspector, Christine Frazer. P.C. Hollis is running a sweep on who D.I. Galloway's replacement will be - there are rumours it will be D.I. Burnside. At the hospital, a solid gold krugerand is found on the old man, and W.P.C. Ackland and D.C. Carver realise the body in the river is the old man's nephew, who was grassing on his accomplices in a krugerand robbery. Sgt. Penny is back at work on light duties, but he is clearly still deeply affected by his recent shooting.

    Director:Derek Lister
    Writer:Geoff McQueen

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  25. The Bill Season 4 Episode 2 - The Three Wise Monkeys
    0.0/10(0 votes)

    #25 - The Three Wise Monkeys

    S4:E2

    D.S. Ted Roach and D.C. Mike Dashwood are on the trail of armed robbers who have taken a women hostage. Sgt. Penny is starting to stress out because of the guns involved, and his collegues are concerned about his reaction. Two D.C.s from Somerset arrive to take a prisoner back. P.C. Yorkie Smith and W.P.C. June Ackland chase the robbers with three members of T.S.G. in the back. After being shot at by the robber and nearly shot by one of the T.S.G. officers, Yorkie punches the officer on the nose.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Geoff McQueen

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Worst Episodes Summary

"Funny Ol' Business: Cops and Robbers" is the worst rated episode of "The Bill". It scored /10 based on 0 votes. Directed by Peter Cregeen and written by Geoff McQueen, it aired on 10/16/1984. This episode scored 0.0 points lower than the second lowest rated, "A Friend in Need".