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The Worst Episodes of The Untouchables

Every episode of The Untouchables ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of The Untouchables!

The Worst Episodes of The Untouchables

Special Agent Eliot Ness and his elite team of incorruptible agents battle organized crime in 1930s Chicago.

Seasons4

  1. Background image for The Jazz Man
    6.7/10(45 votes)

    #1 - The Jazz Man

    S4:E27

    During the blistering summer of 1931, Ness and his men are working tirelessly against both the illicit whiskey and the narcotics that are flooding the city. One morning, a despondent Capt. Jim Johnson visits Ness in his office; Capt. Johnson had been on a raid that netted 50 dope addicts-- one of them was his son Buz. Ness talks to Buz behind bars.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  2. Background image for Come and Kill Me
    6.9/10(50 votes)

    #2 - Come and Kill Me

    S4:E9

    July 4, 1930.  40,000 horse racing fans fill Arlington Park.  Ness and his men have Arnold ""Spats"" Vincent under surveillance; they will close in on him as soon as he gets a piece of paper: a list with the names of officials in high places who are ready to do business with the crime cartel.  2 hoods (one tall, one short), apparently associates of Spats, approach him.  The tall hood sits next to him and whispers something to him; then he stabs Spats. 

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  3. Background image for The Butcher's Boy
    7.0/10(52 votes)

    #3 - The Butcher's Boy

    S4:E22

    Racketeer Gus Ducek is fingered to be knocked off. But when the car with the hitmen drives towards him, Ducek's boys fire back with machine guns, turning the tables; one hitman dies, Boley Davis escapes. Watching the botched rubout attempt are Lt. Philip Hedden and Sgt. Davey McCain. Eliot Ness and his men are out to pin the murder attempt on Hedden, since the hitmen were driving one of his cars.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  4. Background image for Mexican Stake-Out
    7.1/10(118 votes)

    #4 - Mexican Stake-Out

    S1:E7

    Eliot Ness is lured south of the border to retrieve a witness who will help his case. Only it's a set-up...once there, the mobster on trial is planning to have Ness killed.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  5. Background image for The Spoiler
    7.1/10(57 votes)

    #5 - The Spoiler

    S4:E23

    New Jersey waterfront, 1933. Johnny Mizo had been marked for death by the American crime cartel; he had fled to Brazil. Now, he has returned to America to get the $200,000 he had hastily stashed in a hideout before fleeing. The Captain tells Mizo he has exactly 11 days, and then the ship sails back to Rio de Janeiro, with or without him.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  6. Background image for The Giant Killer
    7.1/10(48 votes)

    #6 - The Giant Killer

    S4:E25

    April 28, 1932. Chicago. 3,500 fans are at the arena, watching the end of a 7-day bicycle race. But Ed ""Duke"" Monte is there to make a drop-off. Ness and Lee Hobson catch him, with a quarter of a million dollars in counterfeit bills in his leather bag. On May 25, Monte is sentenced to 10-15 years in the State Pen. That same day, at Monte's old headquarters (the Odeon Theatre which specializes in Burlesque), his former lieutenant, Lou Sultan, is having the guy he accuses of being the stoolie, Parrot Krebs, worked over by his thugs.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  8. Background image for Ain't We Got Fun?
    7.2/10(133 votes)

    #7 - Ain't We Got Fun?

    S1:E5

    Summer 1933, Chicago. The mobsters were branching out from liquor, going into the numbers racket, call girls, gambling and dope. One of the most successful gangsters is "Big" Jim Harrington; right now he and his gang are in back of Benny Hoff's Blue Poodle nightclub, and they smash a truckload of liquor.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  9. Background image for The Vincent Mad Dog Coll Story
    7.2/10(129 votes)

    #8 - The Vincent Mad Dog Coll Story

    S1:E6

    February 1931. In Churchill Downs, the entries for the Kentucky Derby are closed. Tight-fisted Dutch Schultz, beer baron of the Bronx, places a bet with the Syndicate: 100-grand in the Winter-book on Enchantment to win the Kentucky Derby. Trying to get the most for his money, Dutch knows he will get much better odds now than if he waits until race day.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  10. Background image for The Ginnie Littlesmith Story
    7.2/10(69 votes)

    #9 - The Ginnie Littlesmith Story

    S3:E24

    May 17, 1932. There are many free soup kitchens in Chicago, but one of them in the skid row section is really a front; upstairs, gangster Chiz Gosher, twice convicted of white slavery, has his office. His partners in crime are the powerful, nationwide vice ring known as The Group, represented by hood Vic Cassandros. Chiz's niece is Ginnie Littlesmith, who runs the soup kitchen, and she is not involved in the rackets. Downstairs, Enrico Rossi is working undercover-- he's dressed in dirty old clothes, and phones Ness; Eliot tells him the raid is set for 12:45.* But Vic is soon tipped of Ness' impending raid; Vic goes upstairs and demands the ledger books from Gosher.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  11. Background image for The Cooker in the Sky
    7.2/10(58 votes)

    #10 - The Cooker in the Sky

    S4:E2

    Joe Lassiter is the greatest inside man in the bootlegging racket. He and his sidekick, Nick Karabinos, have just arrived in Chicago by train; Lassiter traveled 1,000 miles because of a 250 grand deal: build a Ness-proof brewery. At the closed Bell Club (which Ness took apart last week), Lassiter meets with bootleg czar Louis Tully and his associates.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  12. Background image for Junk Man
    7.2/10(54 votes)

    #11 - Junk Man

    S4:E20

    Chicago, 1931. On the Southside, on a dead end street, there is a junkyard-- but it's really a front for a narcotics empire, run by gangster Victor Salazar. Ness and his men are on the case; they keep intercepting his trucks, carrying shipments of narcotics. Barney Howe tells his boss Salazar that his problem is the operation's too spread out; but one big shipment will give him the Northside, too-- Barney says he will ""put Chicago in his pocket."" Late at night, they get a call from a hood named Kierson who has info in his briefcase: the time and route of a $2-million commercial shipment of morphine crystals to a medical research center; he's to meet them at the corner of Mohawk and 23rd in 10 minutes.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  13. Background image for Downfall
    7.3/10(62 votes)

    #12 - Downfall

    S3:E22

    Chicago. Pete ""The Persuader"" Kalmisky, former bodyguard of Al Capone, accompanied by Syndicate business manager Alan Sitkin, have a meeting with Joey December, president of the debt-ridden Great Lakes Pacific Railroad. They form a crooked alliance; Joey agrees to transport their illegal liquor on his trains, in exchange for ""20% off the top."" After Kalmisky leaves, Sitkin talks privately with Joey. Sitkin gives Joey $100,000 for 10,000 shares of Canada Central stock, now worth $10 a share;

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  14. Background image for The Floyd Gibbons Story
    7.3/10(59 votes)

    #13 - The Floyd Gibbons Story

    S4:E11

    Chicago, October 1932. Within minutes of the time the Globe's top reporter Carlton Edmunds was shot, Eliot Ness and his men are on the scene. Ostensibly it appears a stray bullet in a gunfight hit Edmunds; he was just a passerby in the wrong place at the wrong time.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  15. Background image for Jake Dance
    7.3/10(55 votes)

    #14 - Jake Dance

    S4:E16

    Late Summer 1930. It started in Wichita, Kansas: a staggering gait called the Jake Dance. (we see a man staggering along using a cane in each hand.) There are many different kinds of alcohol, but the only kind that is safe to drink is ethyl alcohol; many people had been drinking Ginger Jake, which is contaminated with methyl alcohol, also called ""wood alcky."" And people who drank a lot of it often suffered permanent loss of muscle coordination, and developed a staggering gait called the Jake Dance. Many died.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  16. Background image for Line of Fire
    7.3/10(52 votes)

    #15 - Line of Fire

    S4:E29

    Chicago, January 1933. Danceland has a big sign, ""30 girls, open until 2 a.m."" Inside, customers mingle with the dime-a-dance girls. Hoofer Ellie Haskell says goodnight to the owner, Marty Pulaski; outside, she is immediately shot by a sniper on the roof of a building across the street-- the sniper is Herbie Pulaski, Marty's mentally disturbed brother. Lt. Roy Gunther is on the case, he questions Marty, who has 20% of the dancing racket. However, Marty is sure his main competitor, Vince Bogan who owns 80% of the dance racket, is responsible for the killing.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  17. Background image for The George Bugs Moran Story
    7.4/10(134 votes)

    #16 - The George Bugs Moran Story

    S1:E4

    March 2, 1932. Gangster Joe Carroll, sidekick of George "Bugs" Moran, kidnaps 9-year-old Larry Halloran, Jr.-- the son of Lawrence Halloran, president of the United Trucker's Union. It just so happens that at this very moment, Ness and his Untouchables are trying to nail Bugs Moran-- who is now the top criminal in Chicago, since Capone is in prison. Ness leaves Agent Martin Flaherty in charge; Ness has to fly to Washington, DC, since the brass wants him to give Congress the whole story about the Capone operation.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  18. Background image for The St. Louis Story
    7.4/10(114 votes)

    #17 - The St. Louis Story

    S1:E16

    Spring 1931. Gangland warfare had broken out again with sudden violence in the streets of St. Louis. Tim Harrington, who was long entrenched as the undisputed boss of the city, was fighting off the challenge to his leadership from Joe Courtney, an upstart hoodlum. The elder Dink Conway calls for a sit-down between the two, at the Jockey Club. Dink points out they are operating the old way: shootouts and dealing in cash. He offers them organization and protection, and says the new way is to use fronts to cover your criminal activities and keep books so the Feds can't get you on income tax evasion (he knows what happened to Al Capone).

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  19. Background image for The Nero Rankin Story
    7.4/10(84 votes)

    #18 - The Nero Rankin Story

    S2:E28

    September 16, 1933. Although Eliot Ness had successfully destroyed The Underground Court (episode # 46), he had not smashed its parent organization, the big Syndicate, in control of over 50% of the nation's crime. With the death of Judge Foley, who was the chairman of the Syndicate, 5 top-ranking members are now assembling at a roadhouse on the outskirts of Chicago-- to vote on whether or not to appoint Nero Rankin as the new chairman; Nero had been designated by Foley to be his successor, in the event of his death.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  20. Background image for The Eddie O'Gara Story
    7.4/10(57 votes)

    #19 - The Eddie O'Gara Story

    S4:E7

    Chicago. Right after the St. Valentine's Day Massacre. (February 14, 1929.) Ness and his men are scouring Chicago, looking for Bugs Moran.  Ness says there used to be 2 gangs in town, now there's just one.  Ness figures if they get to Moran first, maybe he'll talk-- he might just be mad enough to give them the information they need.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  21. Background image for Blues for a Gone Goose
    7.4/10(57 votes)

    #20 - Blues for a Gone Goose

    S4:E17

    Jazz was born in the Roaring Twenties. It's now 1930, and on Chicago's Gold Coast there's a nightspot called ""Goose Gander's Golden Egg"" jazz club. Blues player Eddie Moon is blowing his hot cornet with the jazz band. But then mobster Lucky talks to Ray ""Goose"" Gander; Lucky wants him to carry Lou Cagan's hooch in his joint. Ray refuses, the strongest drink he serves in his place is coffee. Then Lucky's hitman plays some music of his own-- with his tommy gun; he shoots up the joint.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  22. Background image for The Jake Lingle Killing
    7.5/10(145 votes)

    #21 - The Jake Lingle Killing

    S1:E3

    Gangs have divided Chicago in 2-- the northside is run by the Bertshce mob, the southside by the Viale brothers, Augie & Vito. The line of demarcation being Madison Street. At the news office, Jake Lingle phones in a story to the front desk: gang war has erupted on the near northside, 2 hoods with machine guns smashed the liquor supply at Bertsche's Club Chapeau, in retaliation for Bertsche's mob raiding a Viale warehouse.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  23. Background image for Man in the Middle
    7.5/10(69 votes)

    #22 - Man in the Middle

    S3:E21

    November 7, 1933.  Slot machines are big business; 2,000 of the one-armed bandits rake in $100,000 per week; ($50 per machine).  One night, ""Moose"" Tobin and 3 other Bomer hoods drop in on Porker Davis' upstairs gambling joint.  Tobin tells Davis that Bomer wants to teach him a lesson; the hoods chase everybody out of the joint.  Then they start throwing the slot machines out the 2nd story window; when one of Davis' employees tries to stop them, the hoods throw him out the window. 

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  24. Background image for The Night They Shot Santa Claus
    7.5/10(79 votes)

    #23 - The Night They Shot Santa Claus

    S4:E1

    December 24, 1930. That evening, small-time mug Hap Levinson is playing Santa Claus at the Sackman Orphan Home. Santa brings toys and ice cream to all the waifs. He walks outside, waves good-bye, and is promptly machine-gunned to death by hoods in a speeding car. Quite a shock for all the kiddies. Killing Santa is not a federal crime, but Eliot Ness investigates. Hap was a friend of Ness' for 10 years; they had sort of a truce. If Ness was on official business, they were on opposite sides of the law; unofficially, they were pals.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  25. Background image for The Charlie Argos Story
    7.5/10(59 votes)

    #24 - The Charlie Argos Story

    S4:E26

    June 25, 1933. Ness and Lee Hobson are called to the Castle, a baronial estate just outside of Chicago, which is both the headquarters and home of the underworld's notorious ""King"" Frank Argos; he is one of Ness' old foes. Argos' attorney Eli Halstead explains that wealthy Frank Argos is about to die; he wants to leave his $5-million in bonds to his long-lost son.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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  26. Background image for Ma Barker and Her Boys
    7.6/10(185 votes)

    #25 - Ma Barker and Her Boys

    S1:E2

    January 16, 1935. Oklawaha, Florida. Eliot Ness, along with Bill Youngfellow and Martin Flaherty, are closing in on Ma Barker, who is holed up in a house along with 2 of her sons, Lloyd and Fred. Ness says they are wanted for everything from bank robbery, kidnapping, to first-degree murder. Now that Ness has found where the Barkers are, he contacts half a dozen state troopers and local police for backup. From a distance, Ness yells at Ma Barker and her boys to surrender and come out with their hands up. Ma Barker goes to a closet, and inside is an arsenal of weapons-- machine guns, pistols, hand grenades, etc., enough for a small army. She fires a chopper at Ness; he jumps behind an 8-foot long wooden flower pot that gets riddled with bullets. Ma Barker throws a hand grenade that almost blows up Bill Youngfellow. Ma Barker is the most vicious outlaw they've ever faced. In a flashback, we see how it all started in Tulsa, Oklahoma years ago: Ma Barker was a church-goer, but always making excuses for her 4 boys who were committing petty crimes, which escalated into serious crimes. In 1927, while the 4 boys were looting a store, Herman got shot by a policeman. Pa Barker finally had the guts to walk out on the bunch. Ma and her 3 boys committed bank robberies, and killed a bank guard; also a kidnapping. They committed crimes in a 10-state area. In 1935, Pa Barker tipped Eliot Ness, and Ness almost caught the Barker gang in St. Paul, Minnesota. Then the Barkers kidnapped a millionaire's son and got $200,000 ransom. Arthur "Doc" Barker and his fiancée Eloise left the gang; Arthur took his share of the ransom and went to Chicago, but all the serial numbers were recorded with the police. Around the first of January, 1935, when Arthur spent a $10 bill, the grocer informed Eliot Ness, so Ness knew Arthur was in Chicago. Ma Barker stupidly sent a birthday cake to Arthur (who was using the alias Clarence Tillman), and enclosed a postcard, "Greetings from Oklawaha, Florida." Arthur even more stupidly picked it up at the post office (January 8), even though there was a "Wanted" poster with his photo on it in the post office lobby. Bill Youngfellow tailed him; Arthur was soon arrested by Ness and his men. Back to the present: January 16, 1935. Ma Barker lobs a hand grenade at Flaherty and almost blows him up. Ma Barker throws another grenade at Eliot Ness, crouching behind a large, fallen tree limb, and the explosion almost kills him. Ma Barker is the most malicious outlaw they've ever faced; she keeps firing her machine gun and screaming defiantly. Eliot Ness, trying to give them every possible chance to surrender, brings Arthur to the scene, hoping they will give up. Lloyd decides to surrender, and walks outside and throws down his chopper; his own brother Fred shoots him in the back. Lloyd manages to crawl back inside the house, and dies. Ness lets Arthur walk all the way to the house; he tells his mom they don't have a chance. Then Fred, shot up badly himself, dies. Ma Barker calls Arthur "scum" for surrendering, and points her chopper at him; nevertheless, she lets him walk back to Ness. Arthur couldn't get Ma Barker to surrender, and she finally gets shot inside the house. Thus ended the threat of the Barker gang.

    Director:Unknown
    Writer:Unknown
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Worst Episodes Summary

"The Jazz Man" is the worst rated episode of "The Untouchables". It scored 6.7/10 based on 45 votes. Directed by Unknown and written by Unknown, it aired on 4/30/1963. This episode scored 0.2 points lower than the second lowest rated, "Come and Kill Me".