Episode Rankings

1. #1 Worst Episode
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   #1 - Cursed House

   S1:E103/22/2005

   Recently sacked from his role as resident psychiatrist on Celebrity Jungle Jam, Ted is broke – more broke than his wife Sandra realises – and he needs money fast. He invites a group of old uni friends to a remote country hall for the weekend. They think it's an all expenses paid trip to a luxury hotel. The reality is that he has brought them together with the intention of conducting a nefarious social experiment.

   Director:Susan Tully

   Writer:David Cummings

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   Director:Susan Tully

   Writer:David Cummings
2. 

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   #2 - The Patter of Tiny Feet

   S1:E113/29/2005

   Wendy and Damien Midwich have recently moved from the city to the sleepy village of Culkin, where they hope to raise children. However, after many attempts, the doctor confirms that they are unlikely to ever conceive. The couple are in despair until they meet local witch Rosemary Reagan, who recommends various bizarre devices that she guarantees will give them the child they so desire.

   Director:Crispin Whittell

   Writers:David Cairns, Fiona Watson

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   Director:Crispin Whittell

   Writers:David Cairns, Fiona Watson
3. 

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   #3 - Murder Me

   S1:E124/5/2005

   Harry Nagra learns that he has an incurable disease. Having nursed his parents, he decides he'd sooner go quickly. The trouble is he can't commit suicide – his life insurance is invalid if there's any suspicion that it was self-induced. He decides to solve the problem by finding someone to murder him and approaches a company called Anything Goes, whose motto is "You name it, we'll do it. No exceptions."

   Director:Jonathan Gershfield

   Writer:Sam Lawrence

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   Director:Jonathan Gershfield

   Writer:Sam Lawrence
4. 

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   #4 - The Magister

   S1:E134/12/2005

   Aspiring Hollywood producer Jessie Vasquez's weakness for trashy, obscure flicks brings her to the door of legendary horror filmmaker Kurt Kindel. His move from the relatively conventional to the increasingly strange was accompanied by a startling and unexplained improvement in the gruesome special effects on screen. However, Jessie is here for one film and one film alone — The Magister, infamous among horror geeks as the most terrifying film ever made. When first screened, people died of fear. Kindel withdrew and ordered all negatives destroyed. Jessie plans to use all her cunning wiles to convince him to complete it – thus making his big comeback and, of course, her name.

   Director:Susan Tully

   Writer:Ben Teasdale

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   Director:Susan Tully

   Writer:Ben Teasdale
5. 

   5.7/10(14 votes)

   #5 - Whacked

   S1:E83/6/2005

   Video game designer Doc purchases a copy of the Necronomicon to seek an occult revenge against the business partners who are plotting against him.

   Director:Crispin Whittell

   Writer:Simon Ashford

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   Director:Crispin Whittell

   Writer:Simon Ashford
6. 

   6.5/10(18 votes)

   #6 - Charlie's Angel

   S1:E31/30/2005

   Charlie is being visited by the ghost of his late partner Sam, who is now threatening Charlie's new boyfriend Iggy.

   Director:Crispin Whittell

   Writer:Jonathan Harvey

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   Director:Crispin Whittell

   Writer:Jonathan Harvey
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7. 

   6.6/10(21 votes)

   #7 - txt msg rcvd

   S1:E11/16/2005

   Travelling sales trainer Alex Wright seems to have everything he wants – that is, until a cryptic text message causes events to spin out of control.

   Director:Andy Goddard

   Writers:Nev Fountain, Tom Jamieson

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   Director:Andy Goddard

   Writers:Nev Fountain, Tom Jamieson
8. 

   7.0/10(14 votes)

   #8 - Guardian

   S1:E42/6/2005

   Comatose after an attempt on her life, Kelly goes to a limbo full of filing cabinets to wait while her fate is decided-and to try to figure out what happened to her.

   Director:Andy Goddard

   Writer:Susan Nickson

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   Director:Andy Goddard

   Writer:Susan Nickson
9. 

   7.1/10(13 votes)

   #9 - Vacant Possession

   S1:E62/20/2005

   Rick and Jane are having work done on their new home when Rick accidentally kills one of the crew and discovers how hard it is to get rid of a body.

   Director:Jonathan Gershfield

   Writer:Nick Vivian

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   Director:Jonathan Gershfield

   Writer:Nick Vivian
10. 

    7.2/10(21 votes)

    #10 - Flat Four

    S1:E21/23/2005

    On his way to a big deal, Joey ends up in a strange city broke so he checks into a lodging house full of eccentric people, a circus atmosphere, and grim nightmares, while wondering about the dark fate of the previous tenant.

    Director:Andy Goddard

    Writer:Cris Cole

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    Director:Andy Goddard

    Writer:Cris Cole
11. 

    7.2/10(13 votes)

    #11 - The Irredeemable Brain of Dr Heinrich Hunsecker

    S1:E72/27/2005

    Geeky but unimaginative IT worker Darren inherits and revives a 200-year-old brain in a jar. The mind of Dr Heinrich Hunsecker learns quickly, helps Darren with girlfriend Emma, and plots to take over the world. Emma, soon discovers that Darren now shares that ambition.

    Director:Crispin Whittell

    Writer:Ben Teasdale

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    Director:Crispin Whittell

    Writer:Ben Teasdale
12. 

    7.4/10(11 votes)

    #12 - Fruitcake of the Living Dead

    S1:E144/19/2005

    Baking competitors Margery Faversham and Penny Marchant strive to win the Women's Institute District Best Homemade Fruitcake competition. As Margery sets about preparing her best recipe, she's so obsessed it hardly registers when she catches her husband in bed with their housekeeper. Then comes the shocking news that Penny has died in a car crash. Was this Margery's fault for wishing such a thing? Soon enough, guilt gives way to glee with the realisation that her biggest rival is gone... until eight-time champion Bunty Crow moves into the neighbourhood.

    Director:Jonathan Gershfield

    Writer:Simon Ashford

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    Director:Jonathan Gershfield

    Writer:Simon Ashford
13. 

    7.9/10(18 votes)

    #13 - Death Metal Chronicles

    S1:E52/13/2005

    Bucket of Pus transitions from bleak death metal to upbeat life metal band. It's a big hit... until the members start dying mysteriously.

    Director:Andy Goddard

    Writer:David Cummings

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    Director:Andy Goddard

    Writer:David Cummings
14. 

    8.6/10(17 votes)

    #14 - Nothing to Fear

    S1:E93/15/2005

    Trashy horror writer Ray and his moocher buddy Colin live contented mundane lives sure in the knowledge that everyone is an idiot except them. Nothing could possibly ever surprise them and that's as it should be.

    Director:Susan Tully

    Writers:David Mitchell, Robert Webb

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    Director:Susan Tully

    Writers:David Mitchell, Robert Webb