- 8.7/107 votes
#1 - Reese Joins The Army (2)
Season 5 Episode 22 - Aired 5/23/2004
Reese continues to be a great soldier in the Army until he finds himself in a situation where his Sergeant cannot help. But after comparing being captured to being grounded, he takes action and leads his team to victory. But being such a successful soldier has it's bad parts as well, as Reese prepares to jump from the plane - right into Afghanistan. Malcolm has his hands full as well as he attempts to prove Hal innocent. But being good with numbers helps as Malcolm notices all of the prosecutions given dates are on Fridays - which Hal hasn't worked on in over 15 years. And with Reese missing and Hal's case, Lois falls deeper and deeper into insanity.
Director: Peter Lauer
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.4/108 votes
#2 - Reese Drives
Season 3 Episode 13 - Aired 2/10/2002
Highway horror: Reese gets a learner's permit, which he promptly proceeds to abuse by commandeering a driving-school vehicle.
Director: Jeff Melman
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.1/1010 votes
#3 - Krelboyne Picnic
Season 1 Episode 8 - Aired 3/12/2000
The whole family attends a Krelboyne family picnic, and Malcolm dreads his performance in the event's Academic Circus will make him look like a freak. Disasters abound as stage acts bomb, families feud, and Malcolm's dad serves meat to vegetarians.
Director: Todd Holland
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.0/102 votes
#4 - The Dicks They Are A-Changin'
Season 1 Episode 14 - Aired 4/9/1996
When Dick's evasive about his past, Dr. Albright suspects he's a '60s radical fugitive. Harry joins a CD-of-the-month club, and is swamped with CDs.
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.0/101 votes
#5 - Fourth and Dick
Season 2 Episode 7 - Aired 11/3/1996
Homecoming's upcoming, but Dick can't seem to understand football's appeal. Tommy has a crush on his Glee Club teacher. Sally makes Nina her best friend. Harry gets a job as a security officer.
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.0/102 votes
#6 - Dickmalion
Season 2 Episode 20 - Aired 4/13/1997
While Dick cracks North Rutherford society (to Albright's chagrin), Tommy hangs out with school toughs. Meanwhile, "Mustang Sally" develops an interest in wrestling.
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.0/101 votes
#7 - D3: Judgement Day
Season 4 Episode 7 - Aired 11/11/1998
Dick is all ready to dump Jennifer and try to win back Mary's heart, but then discovers that his relationship with Jennifer has made her jealous. Wanting the old Mary back, who had time for him over her job, he attempts to capitalize on her jealousy by making his romantic interludes with Jennifer very obvious. Officer Don introduces Sally to bowling, but becomes exasperated when she refuses to play by the rules, and so invites Harry and Tommy behind her back.
Director: Terry Hughes
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.0/101 votes
#8 - Dick and Taxes
Season 4 Episode 12 - Aired 2/2/1999
When Harry's boss Doug starts deducting income tax from Harry's paycheck, the Solomons realize that they have never filed a tax return and that they owe $9500 to the government. To combat this, they invent the 'brilliant' notion of lying on their tax return and Dick reworks the sums so that the government owes them several hundred thousand dollars. Sally attempts to help by setting up a failed home hairdressing business, but when women start arriving for haircuts, Harry and Tommy 'camp up' and take to the 'salon' to help. Lying doesn't work, however, and the Solomons are faced with an audit - and the threat of being exposed as aliens.
Director: Terry Hughes
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 8.0/101 votes
#9 - Dick's Big Giant Headache (2)
Season 4 Episode 24 - Aired 5/25/1999
Dick is suffering the humiliation of having been demoted from High Commander to Harry's assistant, performing the most menial jobs, while Sally has been promoted to his old role. Tommy is preparing for his high school prom with Alissa, but when the Big Giant Head insists on coming, things start to slide, especially when Vicki, who missed out on her own high school prom, turns up. After ruining the prom for Tommy and Alissa, the Big Giant Head whisks Vicki off to his bachelor pod in space.
Director: Terry Hughes
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.9/1010 votes
#10 - Smunday
Season 1 Episode 15 - Aired 5/14/2000
The boys stay home from school when their mother thinks it's Sunday instead of Monday. Malcolm thinks of a plan to get Francis out of trouble once again. Hal gets sucked in by a Porsche dealership.
Director: Jeff Melman
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.9/107 votes
#11 - Dewey's Dog
Season 3 Episode 17 - Aired 4/7/2002
Dewey rules, thanks to his new dog that intimidates Malcolm and Reese; Hal and Lois hit the town with big plans---and flu symptoms.
Director: Bob Stevens
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.9/109 votes
#12 - Hal Quits
Season 2 Episode 14 - Aired 2/4/2001
Hal feels like his job is a piece of c* after going to Dewey's class for parent job day. So he decides to take a "kidney failure" weeks off. While Francis is forced to work at the lucky aid over spring break.
Director: Ken Kwapis
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.8/109 votes
#13 - Zoo
Season 4 Episode 1 - Aired 11/3/2002
Malcolm, whose frenetic home life is a kind of zoo, begins the fourth season by accompanying his family to the real thing. A visit to the zoo offers close encounters with creatures great and small. But Hal wishes he could have passed on an encounter with Lois's former beau, who lectures on rain-forest animals. Elsewhere, Reese butts heads with a goat; and Malcolm and Dewey take a tumble into a tiger den. Another storyline checks in on ne'er-do-well Francis, now the unlikely foreman of a dude ranch owned by a cheery German businessman.
Director: Todd Holland
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.8/108 votes
#14 - Future Malcolm
Season 4 Episode 19 - Aired 5/4/2003
Leonard, a cynical, genius chess player with no friends or job, makes Malcolm think he could grow into a similar adulthood. Determined to prevent this undesirable fate, Malcolm tries to help Leonard change his life by lining him up for a job interview with the obnoxious Craig. Meanwhile, Francis finds employ as a nude model and begins to delight in the exposure.
Director: Ken Kwapis
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.7/103 votes
#15 - Everybody Hates Gretzky
Season 3 Episode 15 - Aired 3/30/2008
When Drew decides to cut school to find Wayne Gretzky, Chris reluctantly agrees to go with him.
Director: Jerry Levine
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.7/103 votes
#16 - Everybody Hates The Substitute
Season 2 Episode 14 - Aired 2/12/2007
The substitute teacher expects more from Chris which is making things very hard for him. Tanya figures out if she accuses Drew of hitting her things go her way.
Director: Millicent Shelton
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.7/109 votes
#17 - Mini-Bike
Season 2 Episode 22 - Aired 4/29/2001
Lois forbids the boys to ride a motorbike they found, but Reese disobeys and breaks a leg.
Director: Ken Kwapis
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.7/109 votes
#18 - Grandma Sues
Season 4 Episode 9 - Aired 2/2/2003
Grandma Ida is even nastier than usual (if that's possible) because of a tumble down the front steps that resulted in a broken collarbone, prompting her to sue her daughter and son-in-law for pain and suffering. And there's more momentous news on the home front: Lois is pregnant.
Director: James Simons
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/102 votes
#19 - Post-Nasal Dick
Season 1 Episode 2 - Aired 1/16/1996
When Tommy catches a bug, the crew gets its first taste of human illness.
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/102 votes
#20 - Assault with a Deadly Dick
Season 1 Episode 17 - Aired 4/30/1996
The Solomons' faith in human nature is shaken when they fall victim to crime (""This planet is in a bad neighborhood,"" sighs Sally). Meanwhile, Dick makes Tommy join the school basketball team.
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/102 votes
#21 - Much Ado About Dick
Season 2 Episode 5 - Aired 10/13/1996
Dick's romance with Mary is out in the open---and she doesn't like it. Meanwhile, Sally wants to be a cop.
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/102 votes
#22 - Moby Dick
Season 3 Episode 6 - Aired 11/5/1997
Dick compensates for the loss of Mary's affections with a gain in another area: he puts on weight. Meanwhile, Tommy thinks August is cheating on him.
Director: Terry Hughes
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/102 votes
#23 - Just Your Average Dick
Season 3 Episode 22 - Aired 4/28/1998
Albright derides the Solomons as "weird," so Dick decides to make them "average."
Director: Terry Hughes
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/1014 votes
#24 - Home Alone 4
Season 1 Episode 3 - Aired 1/23/2000
Lois and Hal leave the boys alone for the weekend with Francis. the boys assume that if all goes well, Francis may not have to go back to military school.
Director: Todd Holland
Writer: Andrew Orenstein
- 7.5/108 votes
#25 - Vegas
Season 5 Episode 1 - Aired 11/2/2003
When Dewey's pet rabbit does good in a state contest, the family must travel to Las Vegas for the nationals. But Reese unknowingly sells the rabbit to a restaurant. Now it is up to Dewey (with a little help from a "choking" Reese) to try and save the rabbit. Meanwhile, Malcolm tells Hal and Lois that they embarras him, and that is why he didn't tell them he won state science honors. As a form of repayment, Malcolm gets great seats for him and Lois to see Lois' favorite singer. Lois then gets lucky and is invited backstage where all she really wants to do is figure out why Malcolm doesn't want her around. Hal, on the other hand, is looking all across Las Vegas for a slot machine that he has had dreams of winning the jackpot on. Francis is also in trouble when he gets behind on duties at the ranch, and for the first time sees that Otto isn't just a pushover for everything.
Director: Bryan Cranston
Writer: Andrew Orenstein