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The Best Episodes Written By Patrick Meighan

Every TV Episode Written by Patrick Meighan Ranked from Best to Worst by Thousands of Voters

Patrick Meighan Ratings Summary

"Lifeguard Meg" is the best rated episode written by Patrick Meighan. It scored 7.5/10 based on 4 votes. It was directed by Julius Wu. It aired on 3/27/2024 and is rated 0.2 points higher than their second-best episode, "The Simpsons Guy".

  • Lifeguard Meg
    7.5/104 votes

    #1 - Lifeguard Meg

    Season 22 Episode 13 - Aired 3/27/2024

    Stewie and Brian become overwhelmed after winning a coffee shop. Peter and his friends annoy Meg at her new lifeguard job when they don't follow the pool rules.

    Director: Julius Wu

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • The Simpsons Guy
    7.3/1024 votes

    #2 - The Simpsons Guy

    Season 13 Episode 1 - Aired 9/28/2014

    In a special hour-long crossover with The Simpsons, the Griffins meet the Simpson family when they end up in Springfield after their car is stolen. Stewie takes lessons in pranks and skateboarding from Bart, while Lisa discovers - to her annoyance - that Meg is as good at playing the saxophone as she is. Peter bonds with Homer as they locate the missing car, but then they fight after Peter loses his job when Pawtucket Patriot is revealed to be a copy of Duff Beer.

    Director: Peter Shin

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Road to Germany
    7.2/1017 votes

    #3 - Road to Germany

    Season 7 Episode 3 - Aired 10/19/2008

    Mort Goldman accidentally steps into Stewie's time machine and goes back in time to 1939 Poland, and Brian and Stewie follow to retrieve him. When they find him, the Nazis invade and Mort is taken to Germany, where Stewie and Brian must go to save him, as well as find a way back to the present.

    Director: Greg Colton

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • 8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter
    6.9/1024 votes

    #4 - 8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter

    Season 4 Episode 8 - Aired 7/10/2005

    Peter runs up his tab at Mort’s Pharmacy. When he doesn’t have the money to pay, he decides to sell Meg to the Goldmans. Neil is dating another girl which makes Meg jealous, and Stewie falls in love with Liddane, his new babysitter.

    Director: Peter Shin

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Peterotica
    6.9/1024 votes

    #5 - Peterotica

    Season 4 Episode 24 - Aired 4/23/2006

    After reading an erotic novel, Peter gets the idea to write one himself. Carter gets sued for publishing Peter's book on tape and loses all his money, where he is forced to become a middle-class citizen. Meanwhile, Stewie tries to train for the Olympics.

    Director: Peter Shin

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Road to Rupert
    6.9/1021 votes

    #6 - Road to Rupert

    Season 5 Episode 9 - Aired 1/28/2007

    Brian sells Rupert at a garage sale. Stewie, who is upset with Brian, takes him cross country to Colorado to find his beloved teddy, and ends up having a ski-off to win back Rupert. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license, so Meg has to drive him around.

    Director: Peter Shin

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • 420
    6.9/1017 votes

    #7 - 420

    Season 7 Episode 12 - Aired 4/19/2009

    Brian and Stewie attempt to rally Quahog to try and legalize marijuana.

    Director: Julius Wu

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Peter, Chris & Brian
    6.8/1020 votes

    #8 - Peter, Chris & Brian

    Season 14 Episode 5 - Aired 11/8/2015

    Peter gets a check in the mail from the sale of his mother's home and he remembers that all of his old porn is still in there. When he returns to retrieve his stash, he finds a "to Peter from Peter" tape and realizes that his life has amounted to nothing. Reeling from his own failures, Peter then attempts to fix Chris before it's too late, and forces his son to spend time with Brian.

    Director: Joe Vaux

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Thanksgiving
    6.6/1017 votes

    #9 - Thanksgiving

    Season 10 Episode 6 - Aired 11/20/2011

    Lois cooks a big Thanksgiving meal and invites the whole crew over for dinner, and Joe is shocked when his formerly M.I.A. son, Kevin Swanson, returns from Iraq.

    Director: Jerry Langford

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Farmer Guy
    6.6/1017 votes

    #10 - Farmer Guy

    Season 11 Episode 20 - Aired 5/12/2013

    Peter buys a farm and becomes a meth dealer.

    Director: Mike Kim

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Bri, Robot
    6.5/1010 votes

    #11 - Bri, Robot

    Season 17 Episode 12 - Aired 2/10/2019

    Brian worries about the legacy he's leaving behind, so Stewie makes a robot duplicate as a living biography.

    Director: John Holmquist

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Love Story Guy
    6.5/104 votes

    #12 - Love Story Guy

    Season 21 Episode 11 - Aired 1/8/2023

    The guys recount their first true love stories, leading to parodies of "Castaway," "Dirty Dancing" and various Meg Ryan rom-coms.

    Director: Steve Robertson

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Quagmire's Baby
    6.4/1018 votes

    #13 - Quagmire's Baby

    Season 8 Episode 6 - Aired 11/15/2009

    Father doesn't know best when Quagmire assumes responsibility for a baby left at his doorstep. Meanwhile, Stewie creates a stupid clone of himself that he uses as a slave. When he ends up creating a clone for Brian too, they find out that the clones are unstable, at which point the clones break down.

    Director: Jerry Langford

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • German Guy
    6.4/1013 votes

    #14 - German Guy

    Season 9 Episode 11 - Aired 2/20/2011

    Chris's search for a new hobby leads him to befriend a puppeteer named Franz, until his checkered past is revealed.

    Director: Cyndi Tang

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Boston Stewie
    6.4/105 votes

    #15 - Boston Stewie

    Season 22 Episode 6 - Aired 11/19/2023

    Stewie tries to civilize his half-brother, Boston Stewie, so that he may be adopted. Meanwhile, Meg and Chris start a venture in which people online pay Chris to sit on and smash cupcakes.

    Director: Mike Kim

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Excellence in Broadcasting
    6.3/1014 votes

    #16 - Excellence in Broadcasting

    Season 9 Episode 2 - Aired 10/3/2010

    Brian decides to confront Rush Limbaugh when he comes to Quahog for a book signing.

    Director: John Holmquist

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Veteran Guy
    6.3/1012 votes

    #17 - Veteran Guy

    Season 16 Episode 14 - Aired 4/1/2018

    After Peter and the guys get caught pretending to be military veterans and are found guilty of the Stolen Valor Act, a judge sentences them to join the U.S. Coast Guard.

    Director: David A. Goodman

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Tea Peter
    6.2/1017 votes

    #18 - Tea Peter

    Season 10 Episode 21 - Aired 5/13/2012

    When city hall threatens to close Peter's business, he joins the Tea Party and campaigns to shut down the government.

    Director: Pete Michels

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Christmas Guy
    6.2/1017 votes

    #19 - Christmas Guy

    Season 12 Episode 8 - Aired 12/15/2013

    When Carter Pewterschmidt cancels the annual Quahog Christmas carnival, because he hates the holiday, Peter must transform his father-in-law from a Scrooge into a hometown hero in order to salvage the event. Meanwhile, Stewie devises a master plan to get the one and only thing he wants for Christmas.

    Director: Greg Colton

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Stewie's First Word
    6.1/108 votes

    #20 - Stewie's First Word

    Season 19 Episode 1 - Aired 9/27/2020

    Stewie finally says his first word, and it's a swear. When Lois is shunned by the other moms, she tries to figure out where Stewie could have possibly learned it.

    Director: Mike Kim

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • No Chris Left Behind
    6.0/1022 votes

    #21 - No Chris Left Behind

    Season 5 Episode 16 - Aired 5/6/2007

    After Chris is expelled from school, he is sent to a boarding school that his grandfather Carter attended, but Chris doesn't exactly fit in. Meanwhile, the chicken returns to pick a fight with Peter.

    Director: Pete Michels

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • 80's Guy
    5.8/105 votes

    #22 - 80's Guy

    Season 20 Episode 4 - Aired 10/17/2021

    Impelled by nostalgia, Peter recreates movie scenes from his favorite decade; Stewie and Doug compete to retrieve a Frisbee stuck at the top of the jungle gym.

    Director: John Holmquist

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Trump Guy
    5.7/1013 votes

    #23 - Trump Guy

    Season 17 Episode 11 - Aired 1/13/2019

    Peter is given the position of the next White House Press Secretary and the Griffin family gets ready to make a move to Washington, D.C.

    Director: Joe Vaux

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • Carter and Tricia
    5.3/1016 votes

    #24 - Carter and Tricia

    Season 15 Episode 8 - Aired 12/4/2016

    Carter buys the Pawtucket Patriot brewery and decides to cut some corners to save a few bucks. Peter overhears the plan and runs and tells investigative journalist Tricia Takanawa about Carter's plan to use toxic chemicals in the beer cans. Meanwhile, Brian's drivers' license has expired and he enlists Stewie as an instructor.

    Director: Mike Kim

    Writer: Patrick Meighan

  • CutawayLand
    5.2/104 votes

    #25 - CutawayLand

    Season 19 Episode 4 - Aired 11/1/2020

    Peter and Lois accidentally set up a cutaway gag together, which somehow transports them into the cutaway itself.

    Director: Brian Iles

    Writer: Patrick Meighan