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The Worst Episodes of ABC Stage 67

Every episode of ABC Stage 67 ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of ABC Stage 67!

ABC Stage 67 is the umbrella title for a series of 26 weekly shows that included dramas, variety shows, documentaries, and original musicals. It premiered on...
Genres:DramaDocumentary
Network:ABC

Worst Episodes Summary

"The Love Song of Barney Kempinski" is the worst rated episode of "ABC Stage 67". It scored N/A/10 based on 0 votes. Directed by Stanley Prager and written by Murray Schisgal, it aired on 9/14/1966. This episode scored NaN points lower than the second lowest rated, "Dare I Weep, Dare I Mourn".

  • The Love Song of Barney Kempinski
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    #1 - The Love Song of Barney Kempinski

    Season 1 Episode 1 - Aired 9/14/1966

    Barney Kempinski, thirtyish and contentedly self-unemployed, leaves his Lower East Side apartment smiling and happy. On this fine sunny day he is to be married - 3 o'clock at City Hall - to his girl Francine. In the few remaining hours of his bachelorhood, Barney goes off to tour the city and sing his love song - exuberant, irresponsible and frequently dangerous - to life, love and the city of New York.

    Director: Stanley Prager

    Writer: Murray Schisgal

  • Dare I Weep, Dare I Mourn
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    #2 - Dare I Weep, Dare I Mourn

    Season 1 Episode 2 - Aired 9/21/1966

    Otto Hoffman, a small time West German manufacturer, is a weakling-mercilessly henpecked by his two spinster cousins who live with him. As a young man, Otto's personality was crushed by his powerful father, Karl Hoffman. Otto hated his father, and will soon be rid of him. He has only to go into East Germany to bring the old man's body back to the West for burial. Also in East Germany is his mother's jewelry-which Otto's cousins would like him to smuggle across the border.

    Director: Ted Kotcheff

    Writer: Stanley Mann

  • Where It's At
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    #3 - Where It's At

    Season 1 Episode 3 - Aired 9/28/1966

    Dick Cavett hosts this comedy musical revue. Guests include comedians Ann Elder, Ronnie Schell, Larry Hovis and Pat McCormick. Music is provided by Bob Lind, Thurston Frazier, Delos Jewkes and the Doodletown Pipers.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • The Kennedy Wit
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    #4 - The Kennedy Wit

    Season 1 Episode 4 - Aired 10/5/1966

    President Kennedy's speeches were filled with ringing rhetoric-and also with wit and humor that was eloquent and subtle. He had the gift of what comedians call ""good timing,"" and could deliver repartee with rapierlike precision. Films, stills and recordings recall famous and less well known lines from JFK's campaign speeches and calamities; news conferences (such as his celebrated exchanges with newswoman May Craig); addresses to statesmen and Nobel Prize winners; informal moments with his wife and family; and occasional problems with foreign languages. There's also an interview with David Powers, one of the late President's administrative assistants and a member of the famous ""Irish Mafia."" A close friend since 1946, Powers discusses Kennedy's tour of Ireland and his own duties during the campaign.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • Olympus 7-0000
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    #5 - Olympus 7-0000

    Season 1 Episode 5 - Aired 10/12/1966

    Original musical, songs by Richard Adler, about the world's worst football team, transformed into an unbeatable powerhouse by the miraculous intervention of the Greek gods. Music included: Overture / Olympus 7-0000 - Donald O'Connor & Phyllis Newman / We're Gonna Win - Larry Blyden & Phyllis Newman / What I Mean - Phyllis Newman / I Get Around - Donald O'Connor / I've Got Feelings - Donald O'Connor / For You - Larry Blyden / The Three of Us - Eddie Foy / Better Things to Do - Donald O'Connor & Phyllis Newman / For You - Phyllis Newman / Finale.

    Director: Stanley Prager

    Writer: N/A

  • The Confession
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    #6 - The Confession

    Season 1 Episode 6 - Aired 10/19/1966

    This drama probes the dilemma of a police officer who goes beyond the letter of the law to find the truth. Young Carl Boyer and his fiancee Bonnie agreed on a suicide pact as a last resort when they learned that she was pregnant. Carl turned on the gas jets - but he lived, and Bonnie died. At the police station Carl is interrogated by Lieutenant Hammond. Aiding and abetting suicide is punishable as first degree manslaughter, but Hammond is convinced that Carl is guilty of murder.

    Director: Alex Segal

    Writer: David Karp

  • The Canterville Ghost
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    #7 - The Canterville Ghost

    Season 1 Episode 7 - Aired 11/2/1966

    Original musical version of the Oscar Wilde story with music and lyrics by Jerry Bock and Sheldon Harnick. U. S. Ambassador Otis and his family move from America to England to live at Canterville Hall. The house is reputed to be haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon Canterville but the Otis family doesn't believe it-even after the Ghost appears. Songs included: Welcome to Canterville Hall - Redgrave, Fairbanks, Schafer, Charkham & Colleano / Undertow - Schafer, Charkham & Colleano / I Worry & If You Never Try - Walker & Noone / Rattletrap - Fairbanks / Vengeance - Redgrave / You're Super - Noone / Overhead - Walker / Peace - Walker & Redgrave.

    Director: Burt Shevelove

    Writer: N/A

  • The People Trap
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    #8 - The People Trap

    Season 1 Episode 8 - Aired 11/9/1966

    Story was about a young couple living in one of those overpopulated futures where you have to have a special permit to have a child. They get a little careless, and the wife gets pregnant. If you don't have the permit, your child will be put in cold storage at birth. Later, if you can get a permit, the government will unfreeze the baby and give it back to you. They have a neighbor who has one of those kids, but he's never been quite right in the head since he was thawed out. The couple's only hope is for the husband to win a foot race whose first prize is an acre of land and a baby permit. All the other competitors have agreed that if they win, they'll sell the land to a Big Corporation. The husband won't sell, so the Big Corporation does various underhanded things to keep him from winning. He has to climb over a building to avoid them and win the race. At the end of the movie, the couple and their kid are frolicking on their land while a solid mass of people watches them through a cha

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • Evening Primrose
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    #9 - Evening Primrose

    Season 1 Episode 9 - Aired 11/16/1966

    This original musical, with songs by Stephen Sondheim, is a story about a poet, Charles Snell, who decides to drop out of society and live, secretly, in a department store. To his surprise he finds a group of people already doing just that. The catch is that once inside you must stay forever. Errant group members disappear only to reappear later as store mannequins. He meets a young lady, Ella Harkins, and the two fall in love and prepare to leave. The show ends with a shot of a new bride and groom mannequin in a store window. Songs included: (If You Can Find Me) I'm Here - Tony Perkins / I Remember - Charmian Carr / When - Perkins and Carr / Take Me to the World - Carr and Perkins. Music arranged and conducted by Norman Paris, assisted by David Shire.

    Director: Paul Bogart

    Writer: N/A

  • The Legend of Marilyn Monroe
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    #10 - The Legend of Marilyn Monroe

    Season 1 Episode 11 - Aired 11/30/1966

    Documentary about Marilyn Monroe.

    Director: Terry Sanders

    Writer: N/A

  • On The Flip Side
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    #11 - On The Flip Side

    Season 1 Episode 12 - Aired 12/7/1966

    An original rock musical, with songs by Burt Bacharach and Hal David, about a washed up teen idol (Nelson) who is coached back onto the charts by a pink-haired angel (Joanie). Songs included: It Doesn't Matter Anymore - Rick Nelson / Fender Mender - Joanie Sommers & The Celestials / They Don't Give Medals (To Yesterday's Heroes) - Rick Nelson / Try To See It My Way - Joanie Sommers / Juanita's Place Montage - Peter Matz / Take a Broken Heart - Rick Nelson / They Gonna Love It - Donna Jean Young / Try to See It My Way - Rick Nelson & Joanie Sommers / Juanita's Place - The Celestials / They Don't Give Medals (To Yesterday's Heroes) - Peter Matz.

    Director: Joe Layton

    Writer: N/A

  • The Brave Rifles
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    #12 - The Brave Rifles

    Season 1 Episode 13 - Aired 12/14/1966

    Documentary about the Battle of the Bulge.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • A Christmas Memory
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    #13 - A Christmas Memory

    Season 1 Episode 14 - Aired 12/21/1966

    Classic Capote story set in a small Alabama town where he was sent to live with relatives. The young Capote (Buddy) shared his desperately lonely childhood with his cousin Sook, a gentle and eccentric spinster, and some less imaginative, mirthless relatives. The reminiscence begins in 'fruitcake weather,' time for the annual ritual of baking Christmas cakes for the people whom Sook and Buddy like and admire.

    Director: Frank Perry

    Writer: Eleanor Perry

  • The Trap of Solid Gold
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    #14 - The Trap of Solid Gold

    Season 1 Episode 15 - Aired 1/4/1967

    Ben Weldon is an ambitious businessman on the fast track to success. The company he works for expects him to live the upper class suburban lifestyle on a middle management salary in order to prove himself worthy of advancement. With two kids, a new house, club dues, etc. Ben and his wife Ginny find themselves stretched to the breaking point financially. Ben's coworker Hal Crady suggests he settle for a regional management position, as he hopes to do. Ben dismisses this as ""a dull routine job"" and keeps playing the game since he knows the boss has a promotion for him lined up. Hal suggests he sees a ""crack C.P.A."", J. J. Semmons, who tells him he needs to either get a raise or quit the game. At work he is eager to head a new test computer operation by commuting to Chicago while his finances get shakier. Finally he asks his boss, Mr. Mallory for a raise. After expressing disappointment in Ben, Mallory at first tells him to manage with his ""income bracket."" Ben refuses to be brush

    Director: Paul Bogart

    Writer: N/A

  • Sex in the Sixties
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    #15 - Sex in the Sixties

    Season 1 Episode 16 - Aired 1/12/1967

    Documentary about the changing sexual manners and mores of the 1960's. Participating in the discussion are Drs. William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson, authors of Human Sexual Response, Dr. John Rock, director of the Rock Reproductive Clinic—and Playboy's Hugh Hefner.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • General Eisenhower on The Military Churchill
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    #16 - General Eisenhower on The Military Churchill

    Season 1 Episode 17 - Aired 1/26/1967

    Alistair Cooke spent three days at Eisenhower's farm in Gettyburg, Pennsylvania interviewing the former President about his relationship with and memories of Winston Churchill.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • David Frost's Night Out in London
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    #17 - David Frost's Night Out in London

    Season 1 Episode 18 - Aired 2/2/1967

    In foggy, swinging London, satirist David Frost introduces viewers to the late-life of the most 'in' town in the world. Heading where the action is, David goes to the posh West End, noted for its theaters, smart shops and fine restaurants; and the shady, Bohemian quarter called Soho. London is steeped in history, but on this tour, places are less important than faces: Sir Laurence Olivier, on stage to do his song-and-dance routine from John Osborne's The Entertainer; Albert Finney, who performs a scene from Osborne's Broadway hit, Luther; female impersonator Danny La Rue; and cabaret singer Libby Morris, who offers Just One of Those Things. In two comedy sketches, Peter Sellers portrays a snobbish wine taster and a bombastic BBC announcer interviewing a deep-sea diver (played by Kenneth Connor of the Carry On films).

    Director: James Gilbert

    Writer: Buck Henry, John Cleese

  • The Light Fantastic
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    #18 - The Light Fantastic

    Season 1 Episode 19 - Aired 2/9/1967

    Lauren Bacall and John Forsythe star in this lighthearted look at dancing in the United States. The show is subtitled ""How to Tell Your Past, Present, and Maybe Even Your Future Through Social Dancing,"" and the idea is that the lives we live are reflected on the dance floor. John, who appears as a social commentator, tries to prove that the depression produced the Big Apple; that the Cha-Cha, Bossa Nova and Conga are the result of pleasant Latin-American relations; and that the gradual decline of segregation can be traced through the Cake Walk, Castle Walk and Lindy. Lauren portrays an interested observer, mostly interested in John, but she soon decides to prove a point of her own, that even the Minuet, Black Bottom, Hully Gully and Twist are clues to the emancipation of women.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • C'est La Vie
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    #19 - C'est La Vie

    Season 1 Episode 20 - Aired 2/23/1967

    Musical revue taped in Paris. Songs included: What The World Needs Now / Walking Happy / Just In Time / I Love Paris / Some Of These Days.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • Rodgers and Hart Today
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    #20 - Rodgers and Hart Today

    Season 1 Episode 21 - Aired 3/2/1967

    Salute to the songs of Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart. All music program with no spoken dialogue. Songs include: I Could Write A Book / The Lady Is A Tramp / Little Girl Blue / I Wish I Were In Love Again - Bobby Darin, Falling in Love With Love - Bobby Darin and The Supremes, Lover / With a Song in My Heart / My Romance / Blue Moon / Manhattan - The Supremes, Where or When / Thou Swell / Spring is Here / On Your Toes - Petula Clark, Any Old Place with You - Darin and Clark, My Heart Stood Still / Glad to Be Unhappy / Here in My Arms / Sing for Your Supper - The Mamas and the Papas, Slaughter on Tenth Avenue - The Doodletown Pipers with Count Basie and His Orchestra, Dancing on the Ceiling / Give It Back to the Indians - Peter Gennaro, Johnny One Note -Peter Gennaro with Count Basie and His Orchestra, Wait till You See Her - The Doodletown Pipers, Mountain Greenery - Cast. Quincy Jones was the musical director.

    Director: Bill Davis

    Writer: N/A

  • The American Boy
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    #21 - The American Boy

    Season 1 Episode 22 - Aired 3/9/1967

    Three short films which tell stories about three completely different adolescent boys: one living in the city; one in the country; and one in the suburbs. 1-Skaterdater (with Michael Mell, Melissa Mallory) Some photography by Carroll Ballard. Music by Mike Curb & Nick Venet. A boy's emergence into adolescence is given a gentle treatment in this multiple award winning film. To joyous music the camera follows a young boy's adventures on his skateboard as he and the other members of his gang expertly maneuver along tree-shaded sidewalks and steep suburban streets. When he becomes interested in a girl, and loses leadership of the group in a test of skateboarding skills, he realizes that he is leaving his childhood for a new phase in his life. 2-The River Boy (with Philip Lombas, Chrissy Lapeyre). 3-Reflections (with Carl Chu, Diane Cecilio).

    Director: Noel Black

    Writer: N/A

  • I'm Getting Married
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    #22 - I'm Getting Married

    Season 1 Episode 23 - Aired 3/16/1967

    Original musical, with songs by Jule Styne, Betty Comden and Adolph Green, about a couple soon to be married and their fears and fantasies about what married life might be like. Performed cabaret-style with twin piano accompaniment. Songs included: Getting Married (Living As One) / Love is Our Umbrella / Roots / Venetia / Forbidden Fruit (originally written for the Broadway show ""Fade Out-Fade In"") and possibly Answer My Heart.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • A Time For Laughter: A Look at Negro Humor in America
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    #23 - A Time For Laughter: A Look at Negro Humor in America

    Season 1 Episode 24 - Aired 4/6/1967

    Singer-actor Harry Belafonte produced this showcase of Negro humor, satire and self-parody. Sketches: A suburban couple (Godfrey Cambridge & Diana Sands) irritate their maid (Moms Mabley) by pretending to be white; in jail, a civil rights marcher (Dick Gregory) discusses Black Power; The clergyman doesn't show up for a funeral, leaving the nervous undertaker (Richard Pryor) to deliver the eulogy; In a barbershop routine, George Kirby plays seven parts, including Augustus X and Senator Irksen; A pool hustler (Redd Foxx) talks about poverty and civil rights; A judge (Pigmeat Markham) questions a quarreling couple (Harry Belafonte & Diahann Carroll). Songs included: Dogs - Harry Belafonte / Good Lovin' - Diahann Carroll / Jim Crow - Charles Moore & Bill Reilly.

    Director: N/A

    Writer: N/A

  • The Wide Open Door
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    #24 - The Wide Open Door

    Season 1 Episode 25 - Aired 4/20/1967

    Twins Jane and Jill Marriott are beautiful and criminal. Story concerns their efforts to rob a jewelry store.

    Director: Franklin J. Schaffner

    Writer: N/A

  • The Human Voice
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    #25 - The Human Voice

    Season 1 Episode 26 - Aired 5/3/1967

    Ingrid Bergman plays a middle-aged woman going through a psychological crisis as a love affair ends. French playwright Jean Cocteau's one-character drama unfolds in the form of an extended monologue--a one-sided telephone conversation in which the woman tries to win back her lover despite her growing suspicion that he is calling from his young fiancée's home.

    Director: Ted Kotcheff

    Writer: Clive Exton