An impassioned battle with a voice-activated lift, the amazing career trajectory of a single-issue MP, an incredible chain of events set in motion by the tossing of a two-litre bottle of ginger, Ronnie Stokes tries on the wrong pair of shoes and ends up in hospital, and psychic Sammy Strange tries to predict everything that will happen during an interview on Radio Burnistoun.

Burnistoun's got talent in the shape of a local singing sensation with a unique vocal style, the pioneering BBC Burnistoun takes a look at what soap operas would be like if people actually went to the toilet, and the local meat provider and the town serial killer have a disagreement over who gets to call himself the Burnistoun Butcher.

The Burnistoun hitman discovers it's not easy to assemble a weapon of choice, there's an extremely awkward question about to be asked on the top deck of a Burnistoun bus, a visit to the town's first-ever cloning warehouse, and a local photographer hopes to develop a relationship with wannabe popstar Kelly McGlade.

Burnistoun's most persistent market researcher literally takes a lifetime to get some answers, wannabe girl band member Kelly McGlade takes her story to the Burnistoun Herald, the Burnistoun boozer is buzzing with tall tales of local gangsters, and the police demonstrate a foolproof interview technique which works purely by rearranging the furniture.

A frank exchange of views between two Burnistoun MSPs, a distinct absence of females when the best pub in Burnistoun holds a ladies' night, world-famous clothes designer Larl Kagerfeld makes imaginative use of some unlikely local accessories, and wannabe pop star Kelly McGlade is sick of sharing the limelight and fires her bandmates to go solo.

There is frustration for one hungry Burnistoun inhabitant hell-bent on buying rolls, hopeful popstar Kelly McGlade hones her on-stage repartee, the competition for paid employment turns nasty in Burnistoun Bob-a-Job week, and the latest police drama on BBC Burnistoun features a twist that even the coppers can see coming.