As they sit in a jail cell, Chris and Dan reminisce about Dan's past attempts to sabotage Chris' relationship with Elise.

Chris shirks his responsibilities to go golfing with his boss Mr. Bambridge, so Dan and Elise team up to put an end to his new hobby.

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When Dan goes on an anti-dance crusade, he end up interfering with Chris and Elise's plan to enter a dance contest. Elise then exiles him to a ghost town populated by feral dancers, where he must learn the ancient art of "fight-dancing" to survive.

When the object of Dan’s revenge turns out to be a laid back, undead Egyptian king who won’t leave him alone, Dan resorts to some ancient means of pest control.

Dan, Chris and Elise try to get rid of the monster that Dan accidentally summons from beneath his bed.

Dan and Chris battle over a piece of sci-fi film memorabilia that may destroy their friendship.

Dan goes to a low quality dude ranch where he discovers he can't get a refund.

Dan's grudge against the state of New Mexico leads to a road trip with his best friend Chris and Chris's wife, Elise.

Dan goes to war after his car is accidentally donated to charity.

Dan's favorite sandwich shop gets closed down, so Dan goes after the new gourmet restaurant that replaced it.

Dan gets tricked into signing up for a long-term gym membership, and while fighting it, uncovers an alarming conspiracy.

Dan is convinced his dentist is evil and enlists Chris to help him expose the fiend's secret agenda.

Dan tries to destroy the beach after his car is smashed up by Beach traffic.

When Chris decides to go on a camping trip with Elise and her family instead of hanging out with Dan, Dan vows to ruin the trip for everyone. Guest starring Meredith Baxter and Michael Gross as Elise's Parents and Daran Norris as Colby.

Dan is surprised when Elise's parents invite him to their family Thanksgiving, but soon swears revenge when he learns that they only want to steal his secret family recipe for deviled eggs.

When Dan and Chris land jobs at the mall's Christmas display, Dan vows revenge on a curmudgeonly Mall Santa who despises Christmas. Meanwhile, Elise is assigned by the secret agency to take down the assassin under the codename of "The Snowman".

Dan wants to drive a new superstore out of business, because it's hurting his favorite stores and encouraging Chris to purchase too many items in bulk.

Dan heads to the Department of Controlling Diseases in hopes of ridding the world from the common cold.

When Dan discovers mysterious scratches on his car, he plots revenge against the only culprit he believes could be responsible... The Wolf-Man.

Noise from the animal shelter keeps Dan awake, so he vows revenge.

Dan and Chris hit the road to get even with their friendly neighbor to the north, Canada.

Gridlock motivates Dan to seek revenge against traffic in the city.

After a tree falls on top of Dan's car, Dan blames George Washington.

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