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The Worst Episodes of Family Ties

Every episode of Family Ties ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of Family Ties!

The Worst Episodes of Family Ties

Former 1960s flower children Steven and Elyse Keaton raise their conservative son Alex, daughters Mallory and Jennifer, and later, youngest child Andrew.

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  1. 5.4/10(131 votes)

    #1 - Rain Forests Keep Falling on My Head

    S7:E21

    Jennifer becomes obsessed with the environment after she begins studying the earth's ecological evils. As Alex presents Andrew with a pet parakeet, Jennifer arrives home with news that her science class has begun studying global ecology to explore how the earth is endangered by man's interference. Upset that the world is being destroyed for profit, Jennifer begins trying to make the family more ecologically aware as she laments the destruction of rain forests in Brazil and the ozone layer over the South Pole. While Mallory teaches the parakeet anti-Republican phrases, Jennifer becomes more and more obsessed. When she realizes how many toxic chemicals are in the Keaton home alone, she demands that the family throw out a bunch of household products and shop for safe alternatives. Not stopping there, however, she begins dwelling on the enormity of the world's environmental problems and becomes psychologically overwhelmed. Fixating on such evils as acid rain and radon gas, Jennifer sinks i

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  2. 6.3/10(169 votes)

    #2 - Suzanne Takes You Down

    S1:E19

    Soon after free lance architect Elyse Keaton hires her friend Suzanne Davis to handle clerical chores, she wants to fire the under-qualified, overly aggressive secretary, but Suzanne's marriage breaks up, making the new job her only salvation. After 20 years as a housewife, Suzanne feels she lacks an identity outside the home. Swamped with paperwork, Elyse decides to solve that problem while easing her friend's mid-life crisis. Unfortunately Suzanne's take-charge approach to business throws a wrench into Elyse's client dealings and threatens to ruin the women's friendship. On the brink of firing Suzanne, the frustrated Elyse faces a terrible dilemma when Ron Davis decides he ""needs space"" and leaves his wife.

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    Writer:N/A
  3. 6.5/10(155 votes)

    #3 - Elyse D'Arc

    S1:E22

    In her zeal for good causes Elyse devotes so much energy to committee work that a neglected Steven feels shortchanged. Ecstatic to have won an award for his public television documentary, Steven arrives home eager to celebrate, but every effort is foiled by Elyse's obligations to her various projects. Finally, the over-extended wife-mother-architect-committee volunteer begins to realize she's neglecting her most important committee.

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  4. 6.5/10(145 votes)

    #4 - "M" is for the Many Things

    S2:E13

    Elyse is chocked by her soon-to-be-divorced mother's quick and free-spirited plunge into the singles world, and sparks fly between the two women when Elyse can't help but interfere.

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  5. 6.5/10(144 votes)

    #5 - Diary of a Young Girl

    S2:E21

    In the hospital awaiting a tonsillectomy, Jennifer fears she may never see her family again and, while writing in her diary, she flashes back to regrettable incidents with each family member. Jennifer conjures up memories of the time she deliberately ruined Mallory's date with a boy, and also recalls an incident when her stubborn refusal to rehearse a play with Alex caused him to lose out on the lead.

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  6. 6.5/10(103 votes)

    #6 - The Spirit of Columbus

    S6:E17

    Alex is more than a little sceptical when Nick enters his sculpture "Spirit of Columbus", priced at $200, in an art show at the mall. but when Nick returns with the money and the news that he had several buyers vying for the piece, Alex decides that Nick is completely unaware of the marketability of his work. Appalled that Nick let potential buyers go away empty-handed, he insists that Nick increase the supply to meet the demand and steps in as Nick's manager for a hefty commission.

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  8. 6.5/10(103 votes)

    #7 - The Blues Brother

    S6:E18

    Alex becomes a deejay of his own college radio show with a program he calls "Syncopated Money", designed to "combine classic American music with an indepth analysis of the business scene". While on the air one day, Alex introduces a tune by "the late blues great, Eddie Dupre", only to discover that Dupre is alive when the legendary blues artist himself calls the station.

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  9. 6.5/10(99 votes)

    #8 - Father, Can You Spare a Dime?

    S6:E26

    Nick again demonstrates his flair for teaching art by conducting a class at the "Y" for children, including Andrew. So popular is the class, in fact, that when the "Y" needs the classroom space back for another program, the kids and their enthusiastic parents are very disappointed. Mallory tells the family that Nick would really like to open up his own art school, and Alex escorts Nick to the bank to help him get a loan.

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  10. 6.6/10(154 votes)

    #9 - Lady Sings the Blues

    S2:E18

    Excited at the prospect of reviving her folk-singing career at a local niteclub, Elyse faces the skepticism of Alex and Mallory and an audience unattuned to the songs of the sixties.

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  11. 6.6/10(141 votes)

    #10 - Working At It

    S2:E22

    When Elyse lands a job with a top architectural firm, the load begins to get to her at work and at home. Elyse feels the need to expand her horizons. She lands a job at one of the major architectural firms in the city. But twelve years of not working in an office have put her behind the times. When she becomes over-worked, she starts to neglect her family and the major presentation to the president of the company is jeopardized.

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  12. 6.6/10(119 votes)

    #11 - Bringing Up Baby

    S3:E21

    With two careers, three bickering children and one demanding baby, Steven and Elyse can't seem to find any time for each other. But when they do finally take the time for a quiet evening alone, they miss all the chaos.

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  13. 6.6/10(147 votes)

    #12 - Keaton vs. Keaton

    S5:E21

    Brother and sister go head-to-head when Steven announces a scholarship competition sponsored by his station, WKS. A confident Alex scoffs as the family encourages a reluctant Mallory to enter the competition. In spite of Alex's arrogant comments, Mallory prepares her fashion presentation for the competition and realizes that no matter what he says, she really wants to try. Alex discovers that he may have grossly misjudged his sister's business acumen as well as her sense of fashion. When the winner is announced, Alex and Mallory react to the news in a way that surprises even themselves. Andy loses his favorite toy, Mr. Pig, causing Nick and Skippy to begin a topsy-turvy search of the household to comfort the devastated three-year-old. After their attempt to pass off a newly-bought imposter, Mr. Pig re-surfaces in a most unusual spot.

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  14. 6.6/10(104 votes)

    #13 - The Wrecker's Ball

    S7:E13

    When the first building Elyse designed faces the wrecking ball, the entire family rallies behind her attempts to block the demolition. Elyse is heartbroken when she learns that her very first professional design project, the Cavanaugh Building, is about to be torn down to make way for a mini-mall. Disconcerted by the news, Elyse becomes more and more upset as she starts reminiscing about her early career and how much the Cavanaugh Building meant to her.

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  15. 6.6/10(77 votes)

    #14 - Mr. Keaton Takes a Vacation

    S7:E23

    Steven must confront his true feelings about Mallory's boyfriend when Nick moves in with the family for a week. While Elyse struggles to do the family taxes and Steven buries himself in his Tolstoy documentary, Mallory asks her parents if Nick can stay with the Keatons for a week while his house is being painted. Although Elyse gives in to Mallory's pleas, she warns her that Nick must be made to understand that Steven is very busy and should stay out of his way. During the first night of Nick's stay, protective papa Steven parks himself in a chair on the stair landing to prevent any hanky-panky between the couple. When Mallory wakes Nick up early the next morning to cook breakfast for the whole family, Steven arises with a start and runs into the kitchen, demanding an explanation for their whispers and giggling. When they explain about breakfast, Steven becomes embarrassed and pretends to be sleepwalking!

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  16. 6.7/10(218 votes)

    #15 - I Know Jennifer's Boyfriend

    S1:E3

    Jennifer gets picked on when she befriends a boy at school.

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  17. 6.7/10(191 votes)

    #16 - Have Gun, Will Unravel

    S1:E10

    The Keatons consider buying a gun for protection after getting burglarized.

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    Director:Alan Bergmann
    Writer:N/A
  18. 6.7/10(182 votes)

    #17 - I Gotta Be Ming

    S1:E18

    As ""Big Brother"" to a 10-year-old Vietnamese boy, Alex tries to mold Ming into his own image, and he learns an unforgettable lesson when he breaks a promise to the adoring child.

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  19. 6.7/10(129 votes)

    #18 - Cry Baby

    S3:E19

    The Keaton family adjusts to life with the new baby but while everyone caters to the new arrival, Jennifer struggles with jealous feelings about not being the baby of the family anymore. When Steven and Elyse realize that Jennifer feels left out, they overcompensate by trying too hard to make her feel loved.

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    Director:Sam Weisman
    Writer:N/A
  20. 6.7/10(116 votes)

    #19 - A Word to the Wise

    S4:E18

    The Keaton family fills in his girlfriend, Ellen, on some of the more humorous events in Alex's life before they met in this special one-hour episode. Flashbacks to previous episodes include some highlights from the series' past shows. Alex and Ellen celebrate their six-month anniversary as boyfriend and girlfriend, and the family think it's time for Ellen to know the truth about Alex.

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  21. 6.7/10(102 votes)

    #20 - Battle of the Sexes

    S5:E19

    When Alex plays "gentleman" to his mother and two sisters and orders for them at a restaurant without even asking them what they want, the battle begins with Elyse, Mallory and Jennifer on one side, and Steven, Alex and Andrew on the other.

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  22. 6.7/10(100 votes)

    #21 - Band on the Run

    S5:E20

    As chairman of the entertainment committee for the Leland College 10th reunion, Alex has big plans, which include hiring some great bands to impress attending alumni in the music business. Jennifer finally talks a very skeptical Alex into letting her new all-girl band, The Permanent Waves, audition for the affair. At the audition, Alex is thrilled with the unexciting Polka Boys, but his fellow committee members are left cold until they hear The Permanent Waves. They are so good, in fact, that even Alex is impressed and not only books the group but convinces them to sign with him as manager.

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  23. 6.7/10(116 votes)

    #22 - It's My Party (1)

    S5:E27

    In her quest to become one of the popular kids, Jennifer invites her trendy classmates to her thirteenth birthday party. When they become bored and begin grumbling at her ""lame"" party (which includes a traditional puppet show by her father), Jennifer takes drastic action. With Mallory's guidance, she becomes a ""valley girl"", who then deserts her own party. Yet, it's only a matter of time before Jennifer realizes she isn't having any fun and she rebels against her new friends.

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    Director:Asaad Kelada
    Writer:N/A
  24. 6.7/10(106 votes)

    #23 - Walking On Air

    S6:E6

    When Steven arrives home with news of a job opening at his station, an internship position he feels would be perfect for Mallory, he finds his family deeply engrossed in a contest to locate the missing ""Colonel Crackle"" from clues found in Crackle cereal boxes. An excited Alex happily spearheads the search, which offers the winner a 5,000 dollar prize. Steven is equally enthused about the idea of having Mallory come to work at WKS. Although Mallory tries to squirm out of giving him an immediate answer, Steven dismisses her objections and pressures her into accepting his offer.

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    Director:N/A
    Writer:Katie Ford
  25. 6.7/10(100 votes)

    #24 - Miracle in Columbus

    S6:E15

    The Christmas spirit has come to the Keaton house, where the family is busy baking Christmas cookies when Skippy stops by to ask a favor. He wants Alex to pinch-hit for him as Santa at the mall, and Alex agrees after hearing about the excellent hourly wage. With Mallory and Jennifer along as his wall-paid elves, ""Santa"" Alex dispenses stock tips and financial advice to long lines of children. Besieged by kids with elaborate Christmas lists, Alex is surprised when he's approached by a sad-looking little girl who insists she doesn't want anything for Christmas and doesn't believe in Santa Claus. Her mother explains that seven-year-old Michelle is very depressed that her father, a traveling salesman who is struggling to make a living, won't be home for the holiday.

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  26. 6.7/10(106 votes)

    #25 - Spring Reminds Me (a.k.a. Rosalie's Legacy)

    S6:E22

    As Steven goes thru another one of his dreaded "magician phases" and tries to rope the whole family into participating in his magic tricks, the Keatons get a visit from Evelyn Mitchum, a former neighbor now living in New York, whose daughter Rosalie was beat friend with Mallory in junior high. The family is delighted to welcome Evelyn, but the tragic suicide of her daughter a year earlier makes for some awkward moments when they reminisce about old times. Sensing that Evelyn may need someone to confide in, Elyse makes a gentle but unsuccessful attempt to get her to open up about her devastating loss. When Evelyn turns her attention almost exclusively to Mallory, first inviting her to lunch, then on trips to the mall and the museum, Elyse begins to suspect that Mallory has become a surrogate Rosalie for Evelyn and warns Mallory she may get hurt. But Mallory insists she can and must handle the situation herself.

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Worst Episodes Summary

"Rain Forests Keep Falling on My Head" is the worst rated episode of "Family Ties". It scored 5.4/10 based on 131 votes. Directed by N/A and written by N/A, it aired on 4/16/1989. This episode scored 0.9 points lower than the second lowest rated, "Suzanne Takes You Down".