If Condom Commercials Were Honest

The Obama administration announces a bold new media strategy.

Make sure you watch the end of the video for a special message from Abe.

If White House Press Briefings Were Honest

'If you have any questions, ask someone else. I'm the town bully.'

If Bullies Were Honest

If Jewelry Commercials Were Honest

If Viagra Commercials Were Honest

Turns out the only thing grosser than the food at McDonald's, Taco Bell, Wendy's and Burger King  is how the commercials are made.

If Fast Food Commercials Were Honest  (McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, Taco Bell)

You might as well just eat dyed sugar. It's probably healthier.

If Sports Drink Commercials Were Honest

Although there's still not enough gold jewelry.

If Car Commercials Were Honest (BMW Ford Toyota Chevrolet Parody)

Can you really put a price on love? The answer is, yes, of course you can.

Why Marriage is a Scam

Black Friday: The day invented by people who sell things to lure the people who buy things away from their families on one of the only nationally recognized holiday weekends on the calendar.

If People Who Sell Stuff Were Honest About Black Friday

Thanks to centuries of forced inbreeding and genetic tampering, you too can own docile versions of once dangerous animals.

The Bizarre Unspoken Truth About Pet Ownership

It's the magical time of year when debates coming rolling in way before they're really necessary, and are loaded with a bunch of people you'll absolutely forget.

Why Presidential Debates Can't Be Honest

Gyms: They're the only way you can get fit, aside from all the other ways, and the only place you can get juice, aside from lots of others.

If Gyms Were Honest

If it's hot out and you're in dire need of refreshment, just grab yourself an ice cold bottle of candy.

If Soda Commercials Were Honest (Coca-cola, Pepsi, Dr. Pepper Parody)

It's all about making money by destroying society's already low self-esteem.

If Make-Up Ads Were Honest

Because if anyone needs real talk, it's gamers.

If Video Game Commercials Were Honest (Playstation X-Box Gamer Video Games Parody)

Enough with the maps! We don't even understand their meanings anyway.

When Mobile Providers Are Actually Honest (Verizon, AT&T, Sprint, T-mobile parody)

Only good marketing could get the entire world addicted to black liquid that raises blood pressure and increases stress.

If Coffee Commercials Were Honest (Starbucks, Coffee Bean, Folgers Parody)

When are guys going to have to start enduring the rigors of birth control?

If Birth Control Commercials Were Honest

Let's just go back to blood-letting and bile drinking already.

If Drug Companies Were Honest

They SHOULD tell you, but don't because it's hard to market nightmares.

If Antidepressant Commercials Were Honest

If you like hamburgers, maybe don't watch this video.

If The Meat Industry Was Honest

Energy drinks are just like drugs except with cooler colors.

If Energy Drink Ads Were Honest (Monster, Red Bull, Gatorade Parody)

Airlines: Bending you over for the pleasure of soaring 39,000 feet above the earth in a fart-filled tube.

If Airlines Were Honest (United, Delta, Southwest, American Airlines Parody)

The lottery is a great investment of your hard earned money, but only if you win.

If The Lottery Was Honest

Maybe don't watch this while sitting in your hotel room.

If Hotel Ads Were Honest

Before you try to fast-track that weight loss resolution.

If Every Famous Diet Idea Was Honest

If Toothpaste Ads Were Honest

All purses inevitably end up being overpriced, tiny trashcans.

If Purse Ads Were Honest

Look, Cocoa Puffs are totally the bomb, but maybe eating the entire box in one day isn't such a great thing.

If Children's Cereal Commercials Were Honest

Grocery stores are better at screwing with your head than they are keeping their shelves stocked.

If Grocery Store Commercials Were Honest

They say history is written by the victors, but it's actually written by publishers and politicians who all have agendas to push on high school and college kids. Hooray for public education and terrible textbooks!

If High School and College Textbooks Were Honest

If you've ever wanted to know what it's like to sell your soul and never get it back, just open up a credit card.

Why Credit Cards Are A Scam

Sure, you can buy two 20-gallon drums of mayonnaise for the price of one at your local Superstore, like the crazy person you are. But at what cost to your local community?

If Superstore Ads Were Honest (Target, Walmart Parody)

Thanks to Apple and Fitbit Smart Watches are a great way to keep us honest and track data you couldn't before - because you actually didn't care about tracking it and probably still won't.

If Smart Watch Commercials Were Honest

Theme parks, especially Disneyland, Disney World, and Six Flags are great if you enjoy being mentally (and financially) screwed with while you navigate a maze of barf, torture machines, and fried food.

If Theme Parks Were Honest (Disneyland, Six Flags Parody)

Want the best android and ios mobile games? Great! Just so we're all clear here when it comes to mobile games, 'freemium' means 'free until its time to steal your parents' credit cards so you can buy your way to the end of the game that never ends.' Now available on your favorite iPads and Android Tablets!

If Mobile Games Were Honest (Android, iOS Parody)

Milk, dairy, cheese and lactose commercials are great and all but no one's ever actually looked into how much our consumption of mammal udder juice contributes to growing up big and strong, but we just roll with it anyway.

If Milk Commercials Were Honest

Now that we're starting to get this whole cigarette thing under control, can we take care of the junk food companies that are getting all of us addicted to chips, candy, and crackers? We just wish everyone would be more honest about snack foods.

If Junk Food Commercials Were Honest

Bonnaroo, Coachella, Lollapalooza, Summerfest and other famous music festivals look cool on your friend's Instagram feed but let's be honest, they suck.

If Music Festivals Were Honest (Bonnaroo, Coachella, Lollapalooza Parody)

College is going to be one of the biggest investments of your life, which is why you should just trust what the student loan companies tell you without even thinking twice about how much you could be screwed after school has ended.

If Student Loans Were Honest (College Debt)

Who else is excited for another season of the world's most popular public slaughter house fueled by human lives? Oh ... just us in America?

If Professional Football Were Honest (NFL, Cheerleaders, Concussions)

Now that our lives are pretty much inseparable from our smart devices, it would only be the honest and responsible thing for Apple to do to jack up the price on their super fragile phones.

If Cell Phone Commercials Were Honest (iPhone, Android)

Feeling bloated and need to detox? Well, drinking salad in liquid form will absolutely not help you at all, but boy will you feel Hashtag-virtuous when you share pictures of yourself with our beautiful juice cleanse bottles all across social media. Enjoy the rejuvenating experience of borderline starvation!

If Juice Cleanse Ads Were Honest (Detox, Master Cleanse)

Not that we want tampon ads to get all into the graphic details of what their products actually do. But seriously, what’s with all the yoga and blue fluids?

If Tampon Ads Were Honest (Also Maxi Pads & Other "Feminine Products")

Roger Horton returns for the first time since 2017 to explain why recycling is pointless and, even worse – basically just one big scam.

If Recycling Were Honest

There's nothing quite like claiming your tax-free, multi-million dollar enterprise is inspired by an intentionally homeless, apolitical, friend of prostitutes who told religious leaders to pay their dang taxes.

If Megachurches Were Honest

If dentists were honest, nobody would ever go to the dentist. And, honestly, we'd probably be fine.

If Dentists Were Honest

Everybody is familiar with money, but thanks to cryptocurrencies like Bitcoin, Dogecoin, Ethereum, Stellar, and Binance we can now exchange those boring  green presidential napkins for sexy  computer cash that’s easier to  lose, far more volatile, slaughters  the environment, and can’t be  exchanged for the vast majority of  goods and services! Honest!

If Cryptocurrency Was Honest

White Claw Summer is out, and Horton's Hard Poison Fizzy Summer is IN.

If Hard Seltzer Ads Were Honest

What would happen if dating apps like Tinder, Match.com, Bumble and others were actually honest? They'd sound kinda like this.

If Dating Apps Were Honest

What would happen if crowdfunding sites like Kickstarter, GoFundMe, Indiegogo and others were actually honest? They probably wouldn't raise any funds at all.

If Crowdfunding Sites Were Honest

If we were Honest about smart televisions, we probably wouldn't actually want featherweight FBI surveillance vans spying on us in our living room.

If Smart TV Ads Were Honest

If tax prep sites were honest about why taxes suck so much, we'd probably burn the whole thing down.

If Tax Prep Sites Were Honest

What if NFT collections like Bored Ape Yacht Club, Azuki, CloneX, and other such stupid crap were actually honest about what they were?

If NFTs Were Honest

What if Internet Service Providers like Centurylink, Comcast, and Cox were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

If Internet Service Providers Were Honest

What if toilet paper brands like Charmin, Cottonelle, Caboo were actually honest about that stuff we rub on our butt to rub other stuff off our butts? Roger Horton investigates... in ONE TAKE.

If Toilet Paper Ads Were Honest

What if Wine Companies (vineyards?) were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

If Wine Ads Were Honest

Insurance people are really just the superheroes of bending us over for the pleasure of paying them to do the bare minimum.

Originally Posted In 2015

If Insurance Companies Were Honest | Cracked Throwback

What if chocolate companies like Hershey's, Nestle, Mars, and others were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

If Chocolate Ads Were Honest

What if Gaming Gear companies like SecretLab, Razer, Logitech, Alienware and others were actually honest about what they're ACTUALLY selling?

If Gaming Gear Were Honest

What if social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok were actually honest about how destructive and terrible they are? Well, everybody at Cracked might not have been fired for one.

If Social Media Were Honest (Facebook, Instagram, Tik Tok)

What if Real Estate Companies and Realtors were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

Why You'll Never Buy A House

What if streaming services like HBOMax, Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, and others were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

If Streaming Services Were Honest

What if mattress companies like Purple, Casper, Nectar, and all the others were actually honest about how destructive and terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

If Mattress Commercials Were Honest

What if Virtual Reality companies like Meta and Oculus were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates alongside help from our friends at @TheWarpZone! Check out their channel!

If Virtual Reality Was Honest

What if jobs and employers were honest about the kind of work you'll be doing? Roger Horton investigates.

If Jobs Were Honest

What if hospitals and health insurance companies like UnitedHealth Group, Anthem, Aetna, Cigna, Humana, and others were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.

If Healthcare Was Honest

What if Marvel and DC and everybody else were honest about how they make their dumb comic book movies? Roger Horton investigates.

If Comic Book Movies Were Honest

What if podcasters were honest about the content they were making?

If Podcasts Were Honest

What if cruises were honest about your floating vacation?

If Cruises Were Honest

Welcome to Honest Ads promo

What if were your neighborhood bar was honest?

If Bars Were Honest

What if were your neighborhood dispensary was honest?

If Dispensaries Were Honest

What if were your local movie theatre was honest?

If Movie Theatres Were Honest

If Perfume Commercials Were Honest (Perfume Ad Parody)

What if casinos commercials were honest? Well, here at Horton’s Palace, we are.

If Casinos Were Honest

Roger is your landlord now, and he's getting real honest about things.

If Landlords Were Honest

Looking for divorce lawyers? Hire Roger Horton For All Your Divorce Needs. Call 1-800-Actual-Lawyer Today.

If Divorce Lawyers Were Honest (Divorce Lawyer Commercial Parody)

Live Streamers Rise up!  What's up Rogheads, the stream's about to start.

If Live Streamers Were Honest (Twitch Stream Parody)

How do you know if you can trust your plastic surgeon? At Dr. Roger's Dysmorphia Exacerbation Clinic, We've been Making The World Hotter Since 2012

If Plastic Surgeons Were Honest

Will Vitamin Shops Really get you swole? Your Swole At Horton's Holistic Vita-World

If Vitamin Shops Were Honest

It's Bachelor Party Season! Horton's Concerningly Horny Stag Party Planning has you covered for all your bachelor and bachelorette party needs.

If Bachelor Parties Were Honest

The Cemetery Industry Makes Dying Even Spookier than it already is.

So THIS is what happens to your body after you die

If The Cemetery Industry Was Honest

What if nonprofits were honest about what they're up to?

If Nonprofits Were Honest

Skincare, It's all about making money by destroying society's already low self-esteem.

If Skincare Was Honest

If organic food farms were honest, here's what they'd tell you about "eating clean"

If Organic Food Was Honest

College is going to be one of the biggest investments of your life, so why not spend a little extra buying a bunch of friends by joining a frat or sorority?

If Frats and Sororities Were Honest  (College Greek Life Parody)

What if the job market was honest about the job search process?

If Job Searching Were Honest (LinkedIn, ZipRecruiter, Indeed Parody)

If Rideshare Apps Were Honest, here's what they'd say.

If Rideshare Apps Were Honest (Uber, Lyft Parody)

If Online Shopping Were Honest, here's what they'd say.

If Amazon Were Honest (Amazon Parody)

If Local Tourism Ads were honest, here's what they'd say.

If Government Tourism Ads Were Honest (Local Tourism Board Parody)

As it turns out, Leonardo DaVinci didn't know anything about men's anatomy, despite depicting it in art like, a lot.

Leonardo DaVinci Had No Idea How Men's Junk Worked

If electric car commercials were honest, here's how they'd sound.

If Electric Cars Were Honest (Tesla EV Parody)

What if Hollywood were honest about how they make their dumb holiday Rom-com movies? Roger Horton investigates.

If Holiday Movies Were Honest

The 12 Days Of Rogemas | Happy Holidays from Honest Ads

Honest Ads is on hiatus, but please enjoy this bonus content of Roger Reading some extremely honest thirst tweets about him.

If Thirst Tweets Were Honest (Twitter, Buzzfeed)

Happy New Year from Roger and the Cracked team! See you in 2024.

If 2023 Were Honest

What if homeshare tech companies like AirBnB were actually honest about how terrible they are?

If AirBnB Was Honest

If your local news was honest, here's what they'd say, according to Roger Horton

If The News Were Honest

A series of videos starring Roger Horton who presents a number of products in an atypically honest way.

All Episodes of Honest Ads

Season 1

If Condom Commercials Were Honest

Season 1 Episode 1 - Aired 9/27/2012

If White House Press Briefings Were Honest

Season 1 Episode 2 - Aired 9/6/2013

If Bullies Were Honest

Season 1 Episode 3 - Aired 8/29/2014