Mahalia accidentally gets the byline for John's article on racial equality, but when the piece wins a prize of an electric car, John happily assumes the role of ""Mr. Sanchez,"" a ""light-skinned"" Hispanic. Continuing the charade, John tries to impress a sexy Basque activist and ends up leading a radical Basque political group. Upset that John is capitalizing on the troubles of a minority group for glory and romance, Mahalia gets revenge by conspiring with the Basques to fool him into appearing as Abraham Lincoln in her son's school play. Meanwhile, when Gene asks Dexter to be his infant son's godfather, Dexter realizes that he was never baptized. Fearing that he will go to hell when he dies, Dexter convinces a street preacher to baptize him. Unfortunately, the marauding elephant scares the preacher away and sprays Dexter with holy water -- which he interprets as a sign from God.

Dexter's estranged father comes to see John's autobiographical play about father-son issues, continually rewritten after comments by the copy shop attendant.

After John gives Eggers advice on how to get the man of her dreams, she uses the opportunity to get him to agree to be her date for a Halloween party. Meanwhile, Gene must prove his mettle by cleaning up a toxic chemical spill.

Attempting to share John's love of literature, Carly signs up for a course on Ernest Hemingway. In exchange, John agrees to a fitness programme -- with Eggers as his all too personal trainer.

John finally proposes to Catherine, she accepts, and everyone shows up for the wedding -- except the bride and groom. John accepts Carly's eager proposition to come home with her for the evening. But he disappoints Carly by proclaiming that he still loves Catherine. Mahalia advises John to call a psychiatrist, but after John reveals his deepest feelings--and his identity--he's mortified to realize that he's talking to radio psychiatrist, Dr. Frasier Crane live on the air. Determined to win Catherine back, John asks Catherine to marry him. Meanwhile, the St. Louis, Missouri Crossroads Bus Terminal begins closing at midnight.

Thanks to John's contest-winning, double-edged essay, Mahalia is named Mother of the Year and faces a custody battle for her kids. The article spurs a home visit from a suspicious child welfare investigator (guest Adams) -- just when taskmaster ""El Capitan"" John is babysitting -- and a custody hearing in which Mahalia and John face off against Mahalia's ex, Stewie, Sr.

Picking up from last season's cliffhanger, this season's premiere polishes off the nuptials between John and Carly. In short order, at the bus station reception, Catherine drops the bombshell to the glowing groom that she's pregnant with John's child — portending a connubial future that's no piece of cake. As a stop-gap solution to the staggering dilemma, the odd trio move in together, and soon see that three is anything but company.

John's mouthing off to the police lands him in jail with musician-author Kinky Friedman, Catherine learns about Carly's past, Eggers practices her mothering skills on Mahalia's daughter Lucy.

John reconciles with Catherine, who takes on a new enterprise by buying the bus bar from Carly and turning it into a jazz club; the entire crew switches to the day shift; and Eggers introduces her beloved dog -- which turns out to be a wild wolf.

Ray Charles has agreed to perform at Catherine's bar, and John must pick him up at the airport. Meanwhile, after Carly breaks up with him, John's denial is so deep he thinks his therapist is interested in him romantically instead of professionally.

John's daughter and son hit town at the same time, and John decides to tell each of them about the other's existence. John's children by different mothers, Rachel and Tony, each unaware that the other exists, meet at the bus terminal. Rachel is in town for a memorial concert by the band Grateful Dead, and Tony has ended his studies at Yale University, although he claims he's on vacation. Not knowing that they're related, they become attracted to each other. When they go on a date, John panics and tries to find them before they become physically involved. Meanwhile, Mahalia persistently tries to seduce an attractive traveler, despite his protests that he is not available. Feeling guilty, she goes to confession at church and finds out he's a priest.

John reluctantly agrees to help Carly's rich, moronic boyfriend Karl campaign for the state senate, but after learning that Karl wants Carly only as a showpiece, John decides to run himself and saves Carly from a loveless marriage by purposefully losing a key debate.

Carly asks John if he wants to have a serious relationship with her -- just after Catherine has indicated that she is interested, then both come to his housewarming party.

John makes a bad impression upon meeting his favorite author Jackson Bishop, but Dexter's friendship with the writer leads to a second chance for John -- and a second faux pas when he succumbs to a seductive model who, unbeknownst to John, is Jackson's wife.

John assures Mahalia that he'll talk to her younger sister Venus about her overly seductive behavior and reckless living. But a case of mistaken identity causes him to end up in the bedroom with the alluring Venus instead. Meanwhile, Gene reluctantly agrees to make his professional boxing debut as the ""Jolting Janitor,"" fighting against Tyrone Brisco, with Dexter as his manager.

Dexter hides from an angry girlfriend in John's apartment, foiling John's amorous intent with his new neighbour.

John tries to help a famed '70s poet (Cassidy) onto the wagon, while attempting to get his second ex-wife pay his first ex-wife's son's college tuition, the bus station bar and lunch counter become the trendiest places in town, a lesbian customer challenges Officer Hampton to an arm-wrestling match.

John searches for a lost package and Carly mulls a marriage proposal.

After a burglary in the apartment building where John and Catherine live, he seizes the chance to play on her vulnerability; Dexter's mom and Cathy's beau have something in common. Catherine is very scared when a thief breaks into the building she lives in. John exaggerates the danger, figuring that if she's frightened she'll want him around. Meanwhile, Carly introduces everybody at the terminal to her millionaire boyfriend, Karl. To Dexter's dismay, his visiting mother recognizes Karl from when she worked as his nanny.

On his ""lucky day,"" John attends the wedding of Mahali'a ex and bets Catherine's IRS payment money on a horse instead of depositing it in her bank -- just the beginning of a scenario in which he ends up in hospital. John wins, but the guy who brokers the bet; Norm steals the money and flees. John must take Dexter and Gene to find the formidable Norm at a sleazy downtown bar and get the money back before Catherine finds out. Meanwhile, Mahalia is furious when she learns that her shiftless ex-husband is marrying a sophisticated woman. She vents her anger in a letter to him, but the letter gets delivered to the wrong man.

John gives Catherine dancing lessons, but she won't let him lead; Mahalia and Carly gives Eggers a makeover to prepare her for a date; Dexter and Gene run the Raincheck Room for a night while arguing about who's in charge; Hampton challenges himself to survive an entire work shift without eating a donut; and the elephant recently seen marauding around the city makes its nocturnal home in the bus station.

John and Catherine can't seem to get together for a date because of John's problems with others: Dexter needs him to play tutor for a high school equivalency exam, and Mahalia needs him to help sober up Oscar for a visit from a social worker.

With Dexter's help, John practices driving so he can renew his license for a vacation with Catehrine; meanwhile, Boyz II Men trade a performance for bus repair.

John, Mahalia, Dexter and Heavy Gene apply for a better playing job at a New Orleans bus station.

Old flames resurface after John and Catherine agree to take a break to assess the direction of their relationship.