Kim drives Greg up the wall when she worries that Sam isn't walking yet. Jimmy advises Greg that he should let Kim have the day off if he wants her to lighten up. So Greg arranges for Kim and Christine to go a day spa, giving him and Jimmy a day alone with the kids at the park. Jimmy gets hot at the park, and talks Greg into taking the kids someplace else that's cool -- a casino. Greg catches Sam on tape taking his first steps in the casino lobby, but then realizes that he can't show the video to Kim because of where it was taken. While waiting for their massages, Christine manages to talk Kim into relaxing more when she returns home. Jimmy pays a friend to digitally alter the background in the tape to a park, so Greg can show it to Kim. Kim is thrilled to watch it, until she -- and everyone else -- views Sam walking right over a pond! Greg has no choice but to come clean with Kim about what happened, causing her to unravel all over again.

When Greg and Kim plan a family trip to Lake Tahoe with the Hughes, Greg remembers a classy restaurant in the area called The Pinnacle Room that his well-to-do uncle always used to tell him about. As he considers eating there a status symbol, it's a big disappointment when Kim tells him they can't book two rooms in the restaurant's lodge, as it's out of Jimmy's and Christine's price range. On the trip, Jimmy is equally irritated when he realizes Greg took a bigger room for himself. After Jimmy puts him on the spot, Greg admits that he took it on purpose because he's always felt held back on account of Jimmy's lack of money. But after a disastrous meal with Kim at the stuffy, snooty Pinnacle Room where everything that can go wrong does go wrong, Greg sees firsthand that the humble life Jimmy lives ain't so bad.

When Kim arranges a playdate with one of Sam's classmates, she's in for a big surprise when the girl's mother, Jessica, drops off her child - she drops off her sweet, elderly nanny, Sylvia, too. Angry about her uninvited guest, Kim ignores Sylvia at first, but when she changes her mind and gives her the time of day, Sylvia lets her know that Jessica yells at her all the time. She's just afraid to speak out against Jessica for fear of getting fired. After Jessica returns to pick up her kid and Kim witnesses her yelling at Sylvia, she tells Jessica off and asks Sylvia to come to work for her instead. But no sooner than the new nanny starts work than Kim figures out why Sylvia got yelled at -- she's incompetent. Yet Kim feels so bad for Sylvia that she can't bring herself to fire her. At least not until she discovers how many other mothers have had her and how they all managed to get rid of her. Meanwhile, when Jimmy buys a robotic dog for Dominic and then accidentally ruins it when he le

When Kim and Greg decide to go on TLC's A Baby Story, they run into major problems with their parents. For example, when Kim and Greg announce that they want to name the baby Charlie if it's a boy and Lucy if it's a girl, everyone calls out with their own picks for a girl. Kim's dad wants the baby to be named Rachel, and Greg's mom wants the baby to be named Margaret if it's a girl. The baby indeed turns out to be a girl, and as Kim and Greg are about to pick the baby up from the nursery, they hear Greg's dad stating that he wished that his own daughter were named Emily after his aunt who practically raised him. After overhearing this, Kim and Greg decide to name the baby Emily.

When Greg tells Jimmy he never does anything for him, Jimmy shares with him a story back in ye olden days -- the 1980s -- when Jimmy, Billy and their friend, Brian, were just a trio of pizza delivery boys with bad hair, and Christine was a lowly waitress at Howard Johnson's. Jimmy flips his lid when Christine lets him know that Kim is coming by with her new boyfriend, as this is going to crush Brian, whom Kim used to be dating before college -- especially since Greg, said new boyfriend, will be staying on Jimmy's couch and mooching off him. When Jimmy meets Greg for the first time, he wonders what on earth Kim sees in him. Tough guy Brian comes over uninvited, and begs Kim to take him back. After she asks him to leave, he plans to beat Greg up, but Jimmy gets him to hold off on his plan of action by saying he'll get rid of the new boyfriend in his own way. So Jimmy takes Greg to a diner, where he learns that Kim is his first, and tries unsuccessfully to scare him off by lying to him ab

Tom and Natalie call Greg to say they're coming for a visit, because Natalie won Tom a walk-on role on JAG in a charity auction. Greg wants his parents to stay in the guest house, so he nudges Kim to ask Jimmy and Christine to sleep on the living room couch and send Logan to Dominic's room. Kim, who doesn't want the critical Natalie around, is relieved when Jimmy tells her that she'll likely be spending the whole day on the set, since JAG does day-long shoots. Kim's elation is crushed when Natalie says that she isn't going with Tom, she's staying home. Tom anxiously awaits his film debut as a jury member, as it's the first time he's ever acted in front of something besides his mirror. One of the other extras fills him in on how he and all the other ""background actors"" (as they prefer to be called) have perfected personalized moves to help them get discovered. Greg, Natalie, Jimmy and Christine see for themselves just what moves Tom invents when Greg brings home a tape of the dailies. W

Greg, Kim, Jimmy and Christine are horrified to see a mother nursing her walking, talking toddler at the park. Greg wonders what's the proper cutoff age for breast-feeding. Kim says about a year, and she couldn't wait to stop nursing after that. But that night, she screams at Greg to get out of the baby's room when he catches her off guard still nursing Sam. Greg thinks she hasn't stopped breast-feeding because she can't sever ties to her son, but Kim confesses she does it so she can have big, milk-filled boobs. Greg convinces her to start weaning Sam now before she's got a walking, talking toddler asking her to breast-feed him at the park, but no matter what he tries, Sam won't take to bottles. When Greg's just about ready to give up, Jimmy tells him how he got Dominic and Logan to wean; he'd dress up like Christine with a bottle shoved under her clothes and pretend to be Mommy. It works like a charm, after which Greg finds out that Jimmy made the whole story up. The next night, Kim c

Jimmy sees Sam playing with an elderly couple's kid at the park, and warns Greg that parents don't pick their own friends, their kids pick them. Following Jimmy's advice, Greg spots a young, attractive couple with a kid of their own, and gets Sam to play with theirs instead. Jimmy's worst nightmare comes true when he sees Christine let Logan play with the old couple's child anyway. Greg and Kim get to go out with the young, attractive couple, John and Rebecca. Greg naturally thinks he got the better deal -- until he and Kim learn the hard way that their couple are violent lunatics prone to road rage. Jimmy is in for a surprise of his own when the old couple, David and Judy, are actually fun to be around. Kim returns to the park and befriends David and Judy in an attempt to steal them away from the Hughes. Christine is angry when she finds out that David and Judy invited all four of them over for dinner, as she doesn't want to share the good couple. At David's and Judy's house, Kim and

Since her doctor put her on bedrest for the week, Kim is in a bind when her babysitter calls and cancels. So Christine offers up Jimmy's babysitting services. Greg and Christine both have to go to the store to pick up stuff for Kim and Jimmy, respectively, so Jimmy recommends they both go together, even though they don't want to. Greg and Christine end up having a surprisingly good time out at the supermarket -- where Greg gets to buy the bread Kim won't let him buy -- that they cap it off with a trip to a coffee shop where Jimmy refuses to go. Kim and Jimmy, who had a bad time together, become jealous when they find out how much fun their spouses had -- and that they're planning to go out again. Greg and Christine are equally jealous when they come back from their second night out to find Jimmy giving Kim a neck rub in her bed. Jimmy and Kim decide to get even with them by pretending they're pals too. But the pair can't keep the facade up after a game of Scrabble gone awry, and blast

When the Warners run out of storage room in the garage, Kim makes Greg donate a box of his old belongings to charity. But after the apathetic collection guy calls his stuff crap and tries to throw it out, Greg takes everything back. Meanwhile, when the Hughes run out of room in the guesthouse, and Christine makes Jimmy donate his old belongings to charity, Greg offers to drive him to the pickup center. Greg then surprises Jimmy by showing him what he did with the stuff -- he rented a storage locker, and set up his own private utopia with everything Kim demanded he get rid of. Jimmy piles his old junk in there, and goes along with Greg's plans to keep the place a secret from the women. Together, they offer to do all the wives' errands for them as an excuse to get away and spend some guy time in the locker. Greg and Jimmy meet their storage neighbors -- a record collector and a Star Wars fanatic -- who are in the same bind as they are with their other halves. Greg's volunteering to run a

Christine's desire to fit in better at school leads her to join a sorority, which in turns leads Jimmy to beg her to come home so he doesn't have to take care of the kids. After seeing Christine rack her brains trying to study for a test and hearing Greg and Kim talk about the study groups they had, Jimmy tells his wife that she should join a study group. Christine doesn't want to join anything where she'll feel like a square peg, but Jimmy is persuasive enough that she gives her younger classmates' group a shot. She gets cold feet when Jimmy drives her there, and she sees the group is in a sorority house. But, because of Jimmy, she marches right into Phi Sigma Gamma and introduces herself to the sisters, who are in the middle of pledging some new blood. The girls hit it off, and after studying economics, the chapter president, Katie, and her right-hand sister, Maryanne, ask Christine to join the sorority. Since Christine already bore witness to what the pledges have to do (like be hum

Kim invites Christine along to a ""Mommy and Me"" group. The activities are so tiring for Christine that she tells Kim she won't attend them again. Kim responds by suggesting Christine could be a good parent if she'd do more with her kids. Christine retaliates by calling Kim a control freak, and soon the two aren't speaking. Their childish fight has repercussions for Greg and Jimmy when their wives won't let them talk to each other either. Jimmy plots to smooth things over between the dueling sisters by calling up both of them and telling them the other was in a car accident. When Christine and Kim each find out that there was no accident, they put aside their differences... and stop speaking to their husbands.

Dominic's kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Joseph, calls in Jimmy and Christine for a parent/teacher conference because he's been acting up in school. When they get there, they find out Dominic mooned the class. Recalling how her parents used to act when they were called in, Christine sticks up for Dominic by refusing to agree to the school's policy of making repeat offenders see a counselor. After Mrs. Joseph alerts her to the fact that Dominic may be expelled if they don't let him meet with the counselor, Christine yanks Dominic out herself and decides to home-school him instead -- a move everyone else thinks was hasty and foolish. Desperate to prove them wrong, Christine initially tries -- and fails -- to teach Dominic by way of a book, until Greg reminds her that Kim's the by-the-book parent. Christine's second plan, teaching by way of baking, is a success, leaving the others sorry they doubted her. But Christine has to put her pride aside when Dominic tells her that he misses his friend

Greg and Kim aren't happy to hear that Sam's pediatrician has retired early and sold his practice -- and his patients -- to a physician they've never met. Trying to give the new guy, Dr. Trabert, a chance, they freak out upon discovering that he's practically a kid himself, has his wife working as his receptionist, and has left his sick kid at home to go to work. Greg and Kim instead make an appointment to meet with Dr. Bernstein, the most famous pediatrician in L.A., and lie their way into his exclusive clientele. No sooner than they get on Bernstein's 'A' list than Sam shoves a piece of pasta up his nose and Greg has to rush him to the doctor to have it taken out. But Greg is forced to wait an unreasonable amount of time while a disinterested Bernstein tends to his numerous other patients. Greg chews the doctor out when he continues to make Sam wait, Jimmy gets the piece of pasta out himself, and Bernstein rudely tells Greg to take his business elsewhere. But Kim makes Greg go back a

Jimmy saves the day when he spies a strange man breaking into Heidi Klum's trailer, catches him trying on (and eating) her underwear, and holds him down until the police arrive. When the story makes the local news, Jimmy's seen as a hero to everyone except Christine, who's furious that he went beyond the call of duty and risked his life in the process. She demands he quit his security job, which she now considers dangerous, and get the studio to give him a different one. Though he doesn't want to, Jimmy asks Mr. Savitsky to reassign him, and ends up the new landscaping supervisor. He grows to dig landscaping, which gives him a golf caddy and wins him the envy of former security guardmates Billy and Roy, but when he overhears a burglary in process, he tries to be a hero there too by jumping the armed assailant... who, unfortunately for Jimmy, happens to be an actor shooting a film. Meanwhile, Greg develops an addiction to nasal spray and starts having junkie-like cravings -- and later p

When Greg and Kim learn that Jimmy and Christine aren't throwing a birthday party for Dominic, they plan one themselves. Jimmy intends to start looking for a job to pay Greg back. Greg tries to dissuade Jimmy, who intends to start looking for a job at the studio where Greg works. Greg unwillingly brings Jimmy to the studio for an interview -- where he tries to make Jimmy look unhirable -- but, to Greg's horror, Jimmy lands a position as their security guard anyway. Greg is further horrified to hear that Jimmy spent his first 9-to-5 schmoozing with the head honcho, Gary, whom Greg is afraid to talk to. Greg fears Jimmy will get both of them fired, especially after Jimmy takes it upon himself to invite Gary to Dominic's party. After Greg sees for himself that Gary actually likes Jimmy, Jimmy presses Greg into talking to Gary. But Greg's nervousness makes Gary think he's a deranged stalker. Worse, he gives Gary's allergic kid a peanut cookie that lands him in the emergency room. In the en

Christine and Kim plan a trip to their parents' house. Jimmy agrees to go to please his wife, but Greg doesn't care to go that far to please Kim, and weasels his way out of it. Greg does go to the airport to help carry Kim's stuff, but when the flight attendant lets him onto the plane, it departs before he can get off -- and gives him the worst free ride of his life. Just as Don loves Jimmy and hates Greg, Christine's and Kim's mother, Jenny, loves Greg and hates Jimmy. Unfortunately, Jenny's slobbering over Greg makes him wish she'd hate him too. A pumped-up thermostat, Jenny's collection of ceramic crap, and her bickering with Don get on Greg's last nerve -- but when he misses a special moment with Sam on the Ludke's relative's farm, he decides doing things to please Kim can't be all bad.

Kim and Greg are horrified to find peanuts in the backyard, since Sam is allergic to them. Wondering who was careless enough to bring them into their yard, they soon find the culprit -- a squirrel. Greg sets up a metal trap to catch the little bugger, so that Sam will be able to go outside again. The squirrel takes the bait, but Greg is too afraid to touch it to get rid of it, so Jimmy -- who's just as scared -- has to do the honors. While en route to dispose of it, it gets out of the bag Jimmy put it in, crawls on Jimmy's leg, and ends up out of the car and back in the yard when he and Greg run for cover. Since Kim knows it won't fall for the trap twice, she hints that Greg should kill it. Greg doesn't want to, until Sam asks if he can go outside to play. While he ponders how to off the thing, Jimmy suggests borrowing a pellet gun from Billy. Kim and Christine head off to the beach, Billy pops by dressed like Elmer Fudd, and the three guys get set for some good old-fashioned squirrel

The Warners' ongoing feud with a crazy neighbor, Walt, escalates after Walt demands Greg cut down a supposedly unsafe tree on his property. Greg solves the problem by calling a town inspector, but it indirectly results in a bigger problem when Jimmy lets the inspector know that he and Christine are living permanently in the Warners' guest house -- which is against the town's zoning regulation. The inspector tells Greg about a waiver that would allow Jimmy and Christine to continue living there, but everyone on the block would have to sign it... including Walt. As he wants Jimmy and Christine to move out, Greg doesn't even bother to tell them or Kim about it until after he experiences a guilt trip over the possibility of the Hughes living miles away in poverty. Jimmy drags a reluctant Greg into his scheme to get Walt to sign the waiver by befriending him, which is no mean feat due to Walt's eccentricity. But Walt isn't the owner of his house, and has to answer to a higher power who does

Kim drags Greg along to church against his will. The church's minister, Reverend Green, introduces Greg to Bill, who runs a daddies group where all the church daddies get together and learn how to be better husbands and fathers. Because Kim wants him to, Greg reluctantly joins it and then tricks Jimmy into going with him. When they get to Bill's house, Greg and Jimmy discover the entire daddies group thing is a front -- the guys just sit around, drink beer, watch sports and enjoy some peace away from their wives. That's how they learn to be better husbands and fathers. But guilt eventually overcomes Greg when he is forced to lie to Kim to keep the group's secret safe.

Greg and Kim worry that they're not making her second pregnancy special after accidentally using the baby's sonogram as scrap paper. To avoid being the kind of parents who ignore their second child, they decide to get the new baby all new stuff, instead of just Sam's hand-me-downs. Jimmy and Christine both think they're overreacting, until Christine realizes they are the kind of parents who ignore their second child; they have tons of videos and photos of Dominic and almost none of Logan. Since Christine has no childhood memories from before she was 4, she assumes Logan won't either, and decides to start faking his childhood photos and videos, using Logan for the walking, talking years, and Sam and hired children for the baby years. After trying unsuccessfully to sell off Sam's nursery set, Kim changes her mind and makes Greg put it in storage just in case Sam might want to pass it on to his children. After Greg gets attacked by a raccoon at the storage locker, he sees how crazy obsess

Christine tells Jimmy not to buy a Valentine's Day gift for her this year, as she's come to the realization that the holiday is just a cheap ploy to get poor schmucks to spend their hard-earned money. Jimmy's glad that they're not exchanging gifts -- until Christine surprises him with a card the day before. Since he assumed a card was a gift, he stalls and gets her to agree to hang onto it until tomorrow, so they can swap on Valentine's Day. He then drags Greg out to the mall to buy one, but it's so last-minute that all the good cards are gone. Desperate, he enlists Greg's aid in tearing down the shop's huge display model, racking up $384 in ceiling damages in the process, and anticipates winning Christine's heart with his life-size card. But the only thing he wins is her wrath after she opens it and sees nothing more than ""Love, Jimmy,"" as opposed to the long, thoughtful message she wrote in her own. Jimmy sulks while going through her old cards to him, until Greg points out to him th

Jimmy seeks to put a stop to Big Jimmy's lies that he coached Johnny Bench and other baseball legends in the minor leagues, because Dominic believes him the same way he did when he was a child. Remembering how upset he was when he learned the truth at 13, Jimmy confronts his father, calling him on his lies. Even though there's no record of Big Jimmy having coached anywhere -- and there never was a uniform stored in the Hughes' attic like he said there was -- Big Jimmy insists he's telling the truth. Jimmy takes Greg and Dominic to a baseball card convention, where Greg calls his mother to blast her for throwing out his now-valuable collection and Jimmy tries to undo all the coaching tips Big Jimmy gave Dominic. Greg bumps into Johnny Bench, and learns straight from the source that Big Jimmy coached him in Buffalo, after all. Jimmy has to eat crow when Greg introduces him to Johnny, who in turn introduces them both to Ernie Banks and Frank Robinson, both of whom Big Jimmy coached, too.

Kim confides to Christine that she and Greg haven't been having as much sex as they were before they had Sam. Greg gets two tickets to a Lakers game and invites Jimmy. When they get stuck in a bad traffic jam on the way back from the game, Jimmy coaxes Greg into stopping by a strip club to kill some time. Worked up from the club, Greg surprises Kim with a night full of passionate sex. Kim is ecstatic at first, but then flips her lid after Christine fills her in that the reason Greg was so passionate was because he and Jimmy went to a strip club. Jimmy advises Greg that he should pull a repeat performance of the night before with Kim, so she'll know it's her that's putting him in the mood and not a bunch of naked girls. After Kim has a chance to cool down, she and Greg discuss what they should do in the future to turn each other on.

While sharing stories about the first time they met, Christine learns that Kim kissed Jimmy while he and Christine were going out. As a result, Christine refuses to sleep with him that night. Greg, meanwhile, doesn't care what Kim did with Jimmy, as he claims to have kissed more than his share of girls at the time. Kim presses him into revealing what number ""more than his share"" is, and then laughs when he says it's fifty. Determined to make Kim believe him, Greg sets about making a list of the names of all fifty girls. Greg's completed list -- of merely forty-nine girls -- turns Kim around so she's no longer amused at Greg. Instead, she's disgusted with him. Jimmy is able to calm Kim down by telling her that fifty isn't a high number at all, when most guys his and Greg's age kissed five hundred girls. Greg would feel inadequate at Jimmy's machismo if he weren't already feeling inadequate over having not even made it to fifty. To spite Jimmy and even the score, Christine kisses Greg, t