If you could live in any TV commercial universe, which would you pick? Choose wisely.

Cracked's best writers highlight the disturbing logical implications of Back to the Future. Incest, suspected infedelity, rape, danger sluts, Calvin Kline, and white people started black history. Also, you ladies might want to stay away from Chuck Berry's restroom.

Like "The Wire," but everyone's Omar.

Think your high school sucked? Try attending one of these..

In the wake of the astrological sign changes, a brand new episode of After Hours asks, "Wouldn't it be easier to just follow the astrology of the Ninja Turtles?"

At some point vampires went from monster to sex symbol. We explain why.

You only get one super power. Choose wisely.

You should never lose sight of your priorities, even during the apocalypse.

Seriously? You don't feel the need to let those of us with nuclear weapons in on the dark wizard threatening to end the world?

Bruce Wayne could probably be prosecuted for his work as Wayne Enterprises CEO. And it's all so he can fight crime less efficiently than the police.

A brand spanking new episode of After Hours where we discuss women's rights, but only in a galaxy far far away.

A brand new After Hours gets to the heart of why you wet the bed until you were eleven.