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The Worst Episodes of Green Acres

Every episode of Green Acres ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of Green Acres!

Green Acres is an American sitcom starring Eddie Albert and Eva Gabor as a couple who move from New York City to a rural country...
Genre:Comedy
Network:CBS

Worst Episodes Summary

"The Ex-Secretary" is the worst rated episode of "Green Acres". It scored 4.6/10 based on 152 votes. Directed by Richard L. Bare, Bruce Bilson and written by Jay Sommers, it aired on 4/27/1971. This episode scored 0.1 points lower than the second lowest rated, "Hawaiian Honeymoon".

  • The Ex-Secretary
    4.6/10152 votes
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    #1 - The Ex-Secretary

    Season 6 Episode 26 - Aired 4/27/1971

    Oliver is looking through his old Christmas Cards to find the return address of an ex-secretary of his who had moved to California. He wants to contract her because when his watch broke before, his secretary at the time found a repair shop that was able to fix it. The secretary, Carol now works for a Realtor who she ends up saving from being coned out of $10,000 from a con man that her former boss, Mr. Douglas had tried to indite back in New York. By episode end, Carol remembers the name of the watch repair shop on Madison Avenue.

    Director: Richard L. Bare, Bruce Bilson

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Hawaiian Honeymoon
    4.7/10141 votes
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    #2 - Hawaiian Honeymoon

    Season 6 Episode 25 - Aired 3/16/1971

    Lisa cons Oliver into taking a 'fifth' honeymoon together, this time in Hawaii. When they check into the honeymoon suite, they are unaware that the hotel manager's daughter, has given her friends the suite for their honeymoon also. Since the suite has two bedrooms it's just a case of both couples avoiding each other while on their honeymoon(s), for a while anyway.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The Wealthy Landowner
    6.8/1089 votes
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    #3 - The Wealthy Landowner

    Season 5 Episode 25 - Aired 4/11/1970

    In a personals ad, Eb advertises himself as a wealthy landowner. He begins communicating with a woman with a Park Avenue address, prompting him to exaggerate his worth even more. By the time she arrives for a visit, Eb is passing the Douglases off as sharecroppers who work for him.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • A Royal Love Story
    6.8/1082 votes
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    #4 - A Royal Love Story

    Season 6 Episode 4 - Aired 10/6/1970

    Lisa tells Lori yet another version of how she and Oliver met. In this one, she was living in a Paris apartment with her father, the deposed King of Hungary. While he was plotting his return to power, Lisa was working as a waitress at a sidewalk cafe when Oliver stopped by for six bottles of champagne. The King wants her to marry a baron who will bankroll his army, but Lisa loves poor American Oliver Douglas.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Charlie, Homer and Natasha
    6.8/1088 votes
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    #5 - Charlie, Homer and Natasha

    Season 6 Episode 13 - Aired 12/22/1970

    Oliver won't take Lisa to New York for a big party, but the issue isn't over. She conspires with Eb to invent new invisible friends, hoping the scheme will end with a trip to the city to visit a psychiatrist.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • A Girl for Drobny
    6.8/1073 votes
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    #6 - A Girl for Drobny

    Season 6 Episode 21 - Aired 2/16/1971

    Drobny the pet duck, which Lisa received from her uncle in Hungary, is lonesome. He annoys Oliver by playing his phonograph and dancing while Oliver is trying to do his taxes. Lisa sets out to perk up Drobny's loneliness by inviting Arnold the pig over to play. But alas the language barrier is to great to overcome. Drobny speaks only Hungarian, while Arnold speaks English, French, Spanish, and a little Japanese. Lisa decides Drobny needs a girlfriend and they set out to secure one for him. Mr. Haney tries to sell Gertrude the female duck, to the Douglases for $600. When that fails, he accepts the $20 that Oliver offers. Drobny & Gertrude hit it off so well, they are expectant parents soon. But of their 3 offspring, 2 are ducklings and 1 is a baby chick.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Everybody Tries to Love a Countess
    6.9/1085 votes
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    #7 - Everybody Tries to Love a Countess

    Season 5 Episode 2 - Aired 10/4/1969

    Oliver loses all hopes of getting rid of his mother-in-law when Mr Haney and Uncle Joe Carson vie to become his father-in-law.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The Wish-Book
    6.9/1084 votes
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    #8 - The Wish-Book

    Season 5 Episode 14 - Aired 1/3/1970

    The discovery of a Wish Book from 1898 leads Haney to tell the story of Calvin and Tessie Whittaker, who once owned the Douglases' house. When a magic lantern is mistakenly delivered by the catalog company, Calvin opens a Wall Picture Theater in Pixley, thrilling audiences with a slide of Abraham Lincoln standing on his head. Eventually he goes to Hollywood to pitch his ideas, but they call him a nut. They even scoff at his idea to put a mouse named Dickey into films. They love Tessie, however, and she becomes a silent film star.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The Blue Feather
    7.0/1090 votes
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    #9 - The Blue Feather

    Season 4 Episode 11 - Aired 12/18/1968

    Lisa's convinced that Hungarian gypsies have placed a curse on her when she receives a dreaded blue feather in the mail. To "de-hexify" her, Haney sells Lisa a ridiculous recipe that she mixes up, places in a green purse, and hangs outside the front door. Eb gets a look at it and panics because the "green purse hex" will bring a drought. He counteracts it with his own concoction in a yellow purse. Oliver takes action to put a stop to all this foolishness.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The Coming-Out Party
    7.1/1085 votes
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    #10 - The Coming-Out Party

    Season 6 Episode 2 - Aired 9/22/1970

    Lori, the little girl who missed the train back to the city, is staying with the Douglases. Lisa's plan to introduce her to the local children by having a party and gets out of hand; the festivities grow to include an elephant and Haney giving biplane rides. While Oliver fights to downsize her event, he searches for a replacement part for his ancient Hoyt-Clagwell tractor so he can begin planting.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The Vulgar Ring Story
    7.2/10104 votes
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    #11 - The Vulgar Ring Story

    Season 2 Episode 28 - Aired 4/12/1967

    Lisa says that woman in her family must marry an American every fourth generation to keep the huge ring she now wears. She regales Hooterville with the story of her great, great grandmother, the Queen of the Gypsies, and her courtship of an American artist, Cornelius. Much stealing and dancing is involved.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Law Partners
    7.2/1092 votes
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    #12 - Law Partners

    Season 4 Episode 17 - Aired 1/29/1969

    Recent law school graduate Brian Williams pitches Oliver on joining him in a new practice. After another of his patriotic speeches, this time about law, Oliver is ready to hang out his shingle. Meanwhile, Lisa is excited about becoming their secretary and Eb is ready to run the farm.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • A Hunting We Won't Go
    7.2/1085 votes
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    #13 - A Hunting We Won't Go

    Season 4 Episode 21 - Aired 2/26/1969

    After a friendly doe wanders onto the farm, Lisa starts a drive to ban deer hunting. When the governor arrives in Hooterville for the start of hunting season, Lisa presents him with her petition. He threatens Oliver and Lisa with jail time because her petition promises everyone who signed it a one-hundred dollar payment.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Lisa's Mudder Comes for a Visit
    7.2/1093 votes
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    #14 - Lisa's Mudder Comes for a Visit

    Season 5 Episode 1 - Aired 9/27/1969

    Lisa's 'mudder' (mother) pays a surprise visit to the Hooterville farm and promptly takes over as a three-week house guest.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Happy Birthday
    7.2/1079 votes
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    #15 - Happy Birthday

    Season 5 Episode 26 - Aired 4/11/1970

    It's Oliver's birthday, and everyone but him wants to celebrate. It also (coincidentally) happens to be Arnold's birthday too. Everyone tries to persuade Oliver to get Arnold a birthday present, while he thinks he deserves one because he's human, while Arnold isn't. It turns out Arnold, and Lisa are the only one's who get Oliver a gift, and when he and Lisa go over to the Ziffel's house for his party, only to find that there wasn't one, they return to find all of their furniture stolen.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The City Kids
    7.2/10100 votes
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    #16 - The City Kids

    Season 6 Episode 1 - Aired 9/15/1970

    Four children from the city spend a week on the farm with the Douglases. While Oliver teaches them to plant seeds and milk a cow, Lisa falls in love with the little girl of the group, Lori. The two bond over a batch of banana jelly.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Jealousy
    7.2/1078 votes
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    #17 - Jealousy

    Season 6 Episode 3 - Aired 9/29/1970

    Eb won't stop badgering "Dad" to buy him a car, though an increasingly irritated Oliver keeps saying no. Meanwhile, Lisa is busy lavishing gifts on little Lori. Feeling he's been replaced in the Douglas family, a dejected Eb runs away to find a new job. He stops by Drucker's store just long enough to tell Sam how Oliver keeps him locked in leg irons and lost his $4000 on a drunken gambling spree in Las Vegas. Eb quickly returns home to discover Oliver isn't the monster he's been claiming.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Uncle Ollie
    7.3/10127 votes
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    #18 - Uncle Ollie

    Season 1 Episode 32 - Aired 6/1/1966

    Oliver's groovy nephew arrives in Hooterville on his motorcycle with long hair, hip lingo and no interest in work. Chuck is excellent with motors, however, and proceeds to "soup up" all the vehicles in the valley. The easily influenced Eb is quick to decide he wants to be a beatnick.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: N/A

  • The Good Old Days
    7.3/10105 votes
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    #19 - The Good Old Days

    Season 2 Episode 7 - Aired 11/2/1966

    Lisa is homesick for the Park Avenue penthouse. So Oliver tells her the story of Gus and Etta, a farmer and his Hungarian wife who are broken and poor, but make the best of their new-found farm life. Unfortunately, the story ends with their farm being destroyed by a freak flood, and Lisa then longs for Park Avenue even more.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • A Husband For Eleanor
    7.3/1089 votes
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    #20 - A Husband For Eleanor

    Season 4 Episode 7 - Aired 11/13/1968

    Oliver plans to leave Eleanor with Mr. Cowan's bull Dudley so she'll birth a calf and start giving milk again. However, Lisa complicates matters when she wants to make sure Eleanor has a good "husband" with bright prospects. No bull Lisa meets seems good enough to marry her "daughter".

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Uncle Fedor
    7.3/1086 votes
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    #21 - Uncle Fedor

    Season 5 Episode 24 - Aired 3/28/1970

    Lisa's skittish Uncle Fedor uses the Douglases home to hide out--mostly under the bed and sofa. He claims he's on the run from the Secet Police who want him for smuggling a secret formula. When a man with a scar and another without an ear are spotted in Hooterville, his wild tale starts to seem believable.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • The Best Laid Plans
    7.4/10168 votes
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    #22 - The Best Laid Plans

    Season 1 Episode 4 - Aired 10/6/1965

    While Oliver makes plans to get the farm in working order, Lisa travels to New York to pack up their furniture. The Hooterville locals begin gossiping, assuming Lisa left him for good. While she's in the city, Oliver's mother connects her with an architect who designs an extravagant country club.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • Culture
    7.4/10117 votes
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    #23 - Culture

    Season 1 Episode 31 - Aired 5/25/1966

    The "Every Other Wednesday Afternoon Discussion Club" decides to bring culture to the valley by starting the Hooterville Symphony Orchestra. Oliver calls the women "nuts" for considering such a ridiculous idea. Undeterred, Lisa calls her conductor friend Sir Geffory, aka "Poopsie", to come and conduct the orchestra. What he encounters is the Hooterville Volunteer Fire Department Marching Band playing the only song they know.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers

  • It's Human to Be Humane
    7.4/10103 votes
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    #24 - It's Human to Be Humane

    Season 2 Episode 19 - Aired 2/1/1967

    Bored and looking for a project, Lisa becomes the head of the "Hooterville Human Humane Committee". She takes her cause to the extreme, declaring everything from duck hunting to selling chicken eggs off limits. Soon, the Douglases house is a zoo and the locals are ready to run her out of town.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Sam Locke

  • Four of Spades
    7.4/1094 votes
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    #25 - Four of Spades

    Season 5 Episode 7 - Aired 11/8/1969

    Lisa the fortune-teller predicts that a mysterious stranger will soon enter Oliver's life. That stranger is Tadpole Talbot, Eb's country music singing cousin. Tadpole hires Eb to go on the road and plug his music, but it's not nearly as glamourous as Eb imagined.

    Director: Richard L. Bare

    Writer: Jay Sommers