The Best Episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000

In the theater, the crew watches astronauts go to the moon, sparking a battle between the lunar beings and Earth in "12 to the Moon" (1960). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Nuveena, the girl from the future, visits the SOL and tempts Mike and the bots into moving to the future with her. This episode features the short "Design for Dreaming" (1956).

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a female dance troupe find themselves stranded on an island of killer spiders in "Horrors of Spider Island" (1960). Meanwhile, on the SOL, the bots manage to snag Mike in their very obvious giant web.

Director: Michael J. Nelson

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a group of Martians, eager for their own Christmas back on Mars, abduct Santa and two children in "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" (1964). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Joel and the bots share essays about Christmas. This episode features the song "(Let's Have) A Patrick Swayze Christmas."

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a lot of airplanes are refueled mid-flight during a young Air Force pilot's training in "The Starfighters" (1964). Meanwhile, on the SOL, The United Servo Academy Men's Chorus stages a gripping performance. This episode features the song "United Servo Academy Men's Chorus Hymn."

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as gangs in a dystopian future attempt to take back control of their city from an evil corporation in "City Limits" (1985). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Joel and the bots invent some new superheroes. This episode features the song "Oh, Kim Cattrall!"

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a group of college kids are trapped on a private island and hunted by a madman in "Bloodlust!" (1961). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Crow manages to ruin both a square-dancing session and a murder mystery dinner theater. This episode features the short "Uncle Jim's Dairy Farm" (1960).

Director: Trace Beaulieu

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a mad scientist exacts revenge by transforming himself into a catfish and going on a killing spree in "Blood Waters of Dr. Z" (1971). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Mike and the bots decide to go fishing.

Director: Michael J. Nelson

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as Hercules journeys to Atlantis to rescue the King of Thebes in "Hercules and the Captive Women" (1961). Meanwhile, on the SOL, the bots engage in some good-natured brawling.

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as cyborgs and tiny dinosaurs hunt down an escaped slave in a dystopian future in "Future War" (1997). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Tom Servo challenges Gypsy to a kickboxing match.

Director: Michael J. Nelson

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a Texas sheriff heads to Malta to clumsily pursue a killer in "Final Justice" (1985). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Crow and Tom are cruel to poor Goosio, Friend to Maltese Children Everywhere.

Director: Kevin Murphy

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watch on as three astronauts become stranded when their ship fails, in "Space Travelers" (1969). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Crow becomes an escape artist, Joel invents a machine that puts your face on cash, and the crew discusses the side effects of the space program.

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: Bridget Jones Nelson

In the theater, the crew watches as an aging socialite lures young women to her mansion in an attempt to transplant her brain into one of their bodies in "The Atomic Brain" (1964). Meanwhile, on the SOL, the bots are unsettled by Mike's chin puppet demonstration. This episode features the short "What About Juvenile Delinquency?" (1955).

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a scientist becomes a monster and rampages a rural desert community in "The Beast of Yucca Flats" (1961). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Crow petitions for film anti-preservation so that bad movies can deteriorate rapidly like they deserve. This episode features the shorts "Money Talks!" (1951) and "Progress Island U.S.A." (1972).

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as Gamera battles the knife-headed kaiju called Guiron, and attempts to rescue two abducted schoolboys in "Gamera vs Guiron" (1969). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Crow ruins Joel's big magic trick. This episode features Joel and the bots' own version of the "Gamera" theme song, in English and in dubious Japanese.

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a mad scientist brings an executed convict back to life; the convict is now out for revenge in "Indestructible Man" (1956). Meanwhile, on the SOL, a parade goes terribly wrong. This episode features the short "Undersea Kingdom, Chapter Two: The Undersea City" (1936).

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a crash causes an astronaut to become an irradiated mutant creature, who then terrorizes a nearby town in "Monster a Go-Go" (1965). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Gypsy doesn't understand Crow and Servo, and Crow and Servo don't understand the Piña Colada song. This episode features the short "Circus on Ice" (1954).

Director: Joel Hodgson

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a secret agent investigates a Venezuelan crime organization manufacturing a mind-altering chewing gum in "Secret Agent Super Dragon" (1966). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Joel and the bots do a read-through of Crow's wholesome screenplay, "The Spy Who Hugged Me." This episode features the "Secret Agent Super Dragon Theme Song."

Director: Trace Beaulieu

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a group of obnoxious teens take over a town after ingesting a growth formula, in "Village of the Giants" (1965). Meanwhile, in Deep 13, Dr. Clayton Forrester is preparing to replace TV's Frank with Torgo. This episode features the song "The Greatest Frank of All."

Director: Kevin Murphy

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a blob-like creature terrorizes a quiet town in "The Creeping Terror" (1964). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Mike refuses to salute the flag Crow has designed.

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as an airport manager winds up a pert of a scheme to rob a shipment of cash from a plane. On the SOL, Mike moderates a debate between Servo and Crow, Jan in the Pan is thrilled with Mike's Urkel imitation, so are the Mads, Pitch, and Santa Claus, and Torgo ruins everyone's good time about Mike's Urkel.

Director: Kevin Murphy

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a hypnotist sends a woman from the present back into the distant past in "The Undead" (1957). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Servo's invitation to join the Observers doesn't go well.

Director: Kevin Murphy

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew witnesses a group of delinquent teens commit one crime, not a wave of them, in "Teen-Age Crime Wave" (1955). Meanwhile on the SOL, the crew tries to escape, and the SOL opens a deli with sandwiches named after movies.

Director: Trace Beaulieu

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as a secret agent in Hawaii goes undercover to keep an extinction-causing chemical from falling into enemy hands, in "Code Name: Diamond Head" (1977). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Magic Voice answers the bots' "What if?" questions. This episode features the short "A Day at the Fair" (1947).

Director: Kevin Murphy

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as mutant leeches capture and drink the blood of people in a small Florida town in "Attack of the Giant Leeches" (1959). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Joel and the bots compare the movie to their own bizarre dreams. This episode features the short "Undersea Kingdom, Chapter One: Beneath the Ocean Floor" (1936) and the song "A Danger to Myself and Others."

Director: Jim Mallon

Writer: N/A

In the theater, the crew watches as Hercules and Jason search for the legendary Golden Fleece in "Hercules" (1958). Meanwhile, on the SOL, Joel and the bots get a visit from some Amazons via the Hexfield Viewscreen.

Director: Kevin Murphy, Trace Beaulieu

Writer: N/A