Harold buys a job lot of coffins and plans to store them in the house, only for Albert to object and threaten to sleep in the stable with the horse until they have been moved.

A con man, Welsh Hughie, played by guest star Leonard Rossiter, tries to sell the Steptoes some cheap lead.

Every Friday night, Harold has promised to take Albert out to the cinema, but it's always to a film that Harold wants to see, consequently Albert is bored to death and decides to wreak the whole evening.

For years Albert has been buying premium bonds, hoping for a winner, while Harold is sceptical that he will ever win. Imagine Harold's surprise when finally one of the bonds comes up and Albert's in the money.

In an attempt to bring in some money Albert decides to advertise for a lodger. Harold threatens to leave as soon as the lodger shows up.

Harold plans to sail around the world with a group of young adventurers, but first he has to persuade Albert to go into an old people's home. Then the problems start.

Harold meets a French girl, and falls for her. When she meets Albert they talk about her family history and it becomes apparent that Albert may have dated her grandmother while on leave during the first war...