NaN/100 votesLoading...#1 - With Sex You Get Eggroll
Season 1 Episode 1 - Aired 3/14/2000
The Mayor wants Head Lifeguard Notch Johnson out of Malibu Adjacent, and she's recruited Kimberlee Clark to join his squad and get the low-down on him by wearing a mini-camera. She thinks that her work is done when Notch decides to bust enslaved girls from a whore house from the inside, by posing as a customer. If the slavers don't get Notch, the Mayor's video will. Or will Kimberlee help Notch to save the day?
Director: N/A
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#2 - Silence of the Clams
Season 1 Episode 2 - Aired 3/21/2000
A unpopular girl, doesn't have a date for ""Clamapolooza"" in a end party for the college students spring break. She starts to polute the beach to close this event.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#3 - In the G-Hetto
Season 1 Episode 3 - Aired 3/28/2000
When Jamaica is blackmailed into running drugs for a gangsta, Notch insists upon taking her place as the "mule". After all, who else can swallow 13 cocaine-filled condoms and then swim two miles? Also, Chip enters the Mr. Pec pageant. The Mayor's a judge, and she's got a guaranteed way for Chip to win.
Director: N/A
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#4 - Love, Native American Style
Season 1 Episode 4 - Aired 4/4/2000
Notch is distraught when his step-father, local Indian Chief Pokemon, passes on, and a local casino developer convinces the Kahonee Tribe to construct a casino on their land. Although the deal's crooked, Notch is no Indian giver, and he seeks a legal way to halt construction. Also, Chip's South American relatives need money, so Chip moonlights as a male stripper.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#5 - Two Thongs Don't Make a Right
Season 1 Episode 5 - Aired 4/11/2000
When Little Peter Gozinya disappears on the beach, Notch and the gang mobilize to find him. And also mobilize to repeal the Mayor's ban on thong bikinis. Which effort will prove successful?
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#6 - Fanny and the Professor
Season 1 Episode 6 - Aired 4/18/2000
The Mayor with help from The Professor, plot to take over Notch's job and the beach with three beautiful robot lifeguards.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#7 - Eat My Muffin
Season 1 Episode 7 - Aired 8/1/2000
When BJ muffs a save, she goes into an identity crisis and ends up in the care of The Divine Rod, who runs a home for lost women. And runs a web-site where people pay to watch the women, and Rod, um, ""treating"" them. Under Notch's direction, Kimberlee infiltrates the cult and snatches it's secret: psychotropic-drug-laced bran muffins. Realizing that BJ is under someone else's control, the bran muffins move Notch into action. Meanwhile, the Tetherball Invitational Tournament is in town, and the Mayor's bet that the gang can win.
Director: N/A
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#8 - Miso Honei
Season 1 Episode 8 - Aired 8/8/2000
When the world's most dangerous tsunami, Miso Honei, is detected rushing at Malibu Adjacent, the Mayor senses a media event and tries to get Notch to surf it. He refuses until the Mayor grants a parole to the only other surfer capable of surviving the wave, Adolf Manson. Manson's bad boy image wows Malibu Adjacent's impressionable children. Will Notch jump on Miso Honei for the kids and ride it safely to shore? Also, Chip and B.J. fall in love and decide to quit the force.
Director: Gloria Muzio
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#9 - South of Her Border
Season 1 Episode 9 - Aired 8/15/2000
When Notch and the girls travel to the South American nation of Humidor to stop a military coup, they end up in prison instead. The shackles aren't so bad, but the all-bean diet? Ai, ai, ai. Can they escape in time to stop the coup? While the others are gone, Chip runs a junior lifeguard program.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#10 - Day of the Jackass
Season 1 Episode 10 - Aired 8/22/2000
Malibu Adjacent is hosting a peace conference between China and Africa, and Notch has been banned from attending. That would be no problem, except Notch's old Army Secret Ops buddy, Captain ""Buck"" Enteneille has shown up and wants to go. It's even more of a problem when Notch sees him going anyway, with a sniper rifle. Can Notch stop Enteneille from ruining the conference, and still keep his friendship with Buck? Tune in. Also, Jamaica falls in love with an African prince.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#11 - A Star Is Boned
Season 1 Episode 11 - Aired 8/29/2000
The glamour of Hollywood is hitting the beaches of Malibu Adjacent: the fabulous stars, the adoring crowds, the death threats. Notch Johnson joins the case when actress Regina Streep is almost killed on his beach. Can Notch find the assailant before they grab Regina? Also, Jamaica runs a bachelor auction.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#12 - Attack of the Cocktopuss
Season 1 Episode 12 - Aired 9/5/2000
When the Cocktopuss sets shores on the beach, the mayor wants it as another wonder of the world. Chip sings for a rock band.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#13 - Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong
Season 1 Episode 13 - Aired 9/12/2000
Vinnie Fellachio returns to terrorizes the beach. Chip's sister, Ava Rommel visits him, and puts the moves on B.J.
Director: N/A
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#14 - B.J. Blue Hawaii
Season 2 Episode 1 - Aired 3/13/2001
Notch gets honored by the Hawaiian Tropic so he and the gang go to Hawaii. Notch meets up with an old friend and discovers that his daughter is a drug lord growing Marijuana, Cocaine, Methadone, and Hashish so he and Kimberlee team up to stop her. Meanwhile, Jamaica and B.J. enter a Miss Hawaiian Tropic Contest. Also, Chip pretends that he is gay to get the mayor to stop trying to get him in bed.
Director: Tim Andrew
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#15 - From Russia with Johnson
Season 2 Episode 2 - Aired 3/20/2001
Notch and his unit must stop a Russian terrorist.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Joe Wiseman, Joe Port
NaN/100 votesLoading...#16 - Remember Her Titans
Season 2 Episode 3 - Aired 3/27/2001
Jamaica's boyfriend has a problem with gambling, and is majorly in debt. Since Jamaica's boyfriend doesn't have the money, he is told by the bookie that he will let it slide if he throws the game. When he doesn't agree, he breaks his leg so that he can't play. Notch decides that he will fill in for him at the game and he is allowed to fill in for him because he never finished high school. Meanwhile, Kody's father comes to Malibu Adjacent from the U.K. to ask Kody to go back and live with him.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#17 - Rod Strikes Back
Season 2 Episode 4 - Aired 4/3/2001
Rod returns and wants his revenge on everyone, Especially for B.J.; Chip's dog ""shitsu"" (sp?) arrives at Malibu Adjacent and challenges Steve.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#18 - Queefer Madness
Season 2 Episode 5 - Aired 4/10/2001
The beach is terrorized by a gang of bad boys.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#19 - Light My Firebush
Season 2 Episode 6 - Aired 4/17/2001
Notch hires his half Indian sister as a life guard and uses savages techniques to help the beach. B.J. is reunited with her mother Ima Cummings. But her (step) daddy butts in her life and threatens B.J. and Ima's lives.
Director: Tim Andrew
Writer: Joe Wiseman, Joe Port
NaN/100 votesLoading...#20 - Chip's a Goy
Season 2 Episode 7 - Aired 4/24/2001
Needing some R&R, the Gang heads to the tranquil Middle East. Their visit with Notch's Israeli counterpart, Noccus Johnstein, is cut short, however, when evil terrorist group HUMMUS kidnaps Notch. Can the Gang save their fearless leader, or will HUMMUS crush them like so many chickpeas? In the meantime, Chip falls in love with Noccus' daughter, Chcch, and agrees to convert to Judaism. He soon finds this means giving up much more than he bargained for.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#21 - A Tale of Two Johnsons
Season 2 Episode 8 - Aired 5/29/2001
When an evil crime syndicate clones an operative to look like Notch, the Gang is suddenly seeing double. The real Notch Johnson must stop ""Evil Notch"" from wreaking havoc in Malibu Adjacent. Can Notch beat himself? Also, Kimberlee's old boyfriend, a musician, comes to town and tries to get Kimberlee to come back to him.
Director: John Putch
Writer: Joe Wiseman, Joe Port
NaN/100 votesLoading...#22 - It's a Nude, Nude, Nude, Nude World
Season 2 Episode 9 - Aired 6/5/2001
The Nude-lympics come to Malibu Adjacent, and someone is killing beautiful, naked women because he feels they are 'Dirty'. Mayor Anita wants to cover up the story, but SPF-30 is at work cracking the case. Kimberlee lands a date with the murderer unaware until he arrives to pick her up that he is the killer of all the women. While on her date, Kimberlee makes a private call to Notch telling him that she is with him but the killer finds out and then tries to kill Kimberlee until Notch and the gang come along to save her.
Director: Tim Andrew
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#23 - It's Showtime at the Apollo 13!
Season 2 Episode 10 - Aired 6/12/2001
Jamaica is chosen as the first black lifeguard in space aboard the shuttle <em>Catastrophe</em>; Notch goes undercover at the Robert Downey, Jr. Senior High School when a student hacks into the shuttle computer and endangers the mission.
Director: Scott McAboy
Writer: N/A
NaN/100 votesLoading...#24 - The Island of Dr. Merlot
Season 2 Episode 11 - Aired 1/19/2001
B.J. and Notch crashes on an island while riding in his airplane, Dr. Merlot decides to make them his throphys.
Director: John Putch
Writer: Timothy Stack, James R. Stein
NaN/100 votesLoading...#25 - The Sexorcist
Season 2 Episode 12 - Aired 6/26/2001
Jamaica has just come back from her vacation and came back with gifts, including a bottle that everyone was afraid of when she was there. Jamaica gives the bottle to B.J. and she opens it and becomes possessed by the devil. Notch has to overcome his past failure at exorcising and get the devil out of B.J. and keep him from repossessing her. Meanwhile, the Mayor's knack for sexually harassing Chip threatens her career when an uptight reporter, with political aspirations of her own, gets wind.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
The Worst Episodes of Son of the Beach
Every episode of Son of the Beach ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of Son of the Beach!
A parody of "Baywatch" featuring Malibu Adjacent's Notch Johnson, the world's greatest lifeguard (hardly), and his unit SPF-30.
Genre:Comedy
Network:FX
Worst Episodes Summary
"With Sex You Get Eggroll" is the worst rated episode of "Son of the Beach". It scored N/A/10 based on 0 votes. Directed by N/A and written by Timothy Stack, James R. Stein, it aired on 3/14/2000. This episode scored NaN points lower than the second lowest rated, "Silence of the Clams".