The Goodies' Animal Clinic looks after various problem animals, including Twinkle the kitten who, thanks to Graeme's growth formula, grows to a massive size and terrorises London.

Kitten Kong

With hardly a penny to their name, the Goodies go prospecting for gold - and discover Cornish cream.

Bunfight at the OK Tearooms

Kitten Kong (Montreux edition)

It's Christmas Eve, and as The Goodies prepare for Christmas they learn that the world is about to end.

Earthanasia

The Goodies buy a movie studio and attempt to revitalise the British film industry, but ultimately descend into chaos when they each try to shoot their own film at the same time.

The Movies

The main attraction at The Goodies Star Safari Park, Tony Blackburn, is hearing the call of the wild and pining for his freedom. The trio realise that they can no longer keep such a magnificent beast in captivity, and release him. But who should they get to replace him?

Scatty Safari

Bill reveals himself to be a Grand Master of the infinitely more subtle and superior Lancastrian martial art of Ecky Thump.

Kung Fu Kapers!

Bill decides to open Disco Bilius and introduces a mixed dancing competition.

Saturday Night Grease

The Goodies’ office accidentally gets covered in concrete, leaving them trapped for a century. They desperately try to survive while they grow hungry and slightly mad…

The End

A series of too honest ads sees revenue for the Goodies' advertising agency plummet, until Tim discovers the joys of string, and Bill and Graeme set about ripping him off.

It Might as Well be String

The Goodies open a pirate radio station - and post office.

Radio Goodies

The Goodies answer an advert for 'a little light housekeeping' and find themselves stuck for five years in charge of an 'overgrown lamp post'.

Lighthouse Keeping Loonies

The unwanted Goodies finally hit the big time after years of failure, only for the government to topple and all forms of fun to be banned, requiring a civil uprising and a puppet government.

Goodies Rule - OK?

The Goodies are asked to market a bedtime drink called 'Venom'. They decide that the first thing needed is a name change to 'Snooze'.

Snooze

The Goodies have hit rock-bottom and are forced to sell Buttercup for a tin of baked beans. In an act of desperation, Graeme plants one of the beans...

The Goodies and the Beanstalk

Tim indoctrinates Bill and Graeme into the Scouts, but they take things to extremes resulting in the movement being declared illegal.

Scoutrageous

Graeme's attempt to send rabbits to the moon seems to be a failure until Bill and Tim's space voyage discovers plots of vegetables and the menacing presence of Big Bunny.

Invasion of the Moon Creatures

A job to dispose of a harmless can of 'tomato soup' for an American military base sees the whole British population turned into clowns and ripe for an invasion by US troops.

The Clown Virus

Graeme is faced with selling the image of two potential Prime Ministers to the nation; Bill as the revolutionary Che Monyou and Tim as the stunning Timita.

Politics

Graeme's dog breeding venture gets out of hand and Tim's only chance to win at Crufts is to dress Bill in a dog costume, which forces Graeme to create a shaggy monster of his own.

Frankenfido

Tim invites Bill and Graeme to perform on the talent show he presents.

Hype Pressure

Bill the soccer hooligan is in fine form as Tim becomes Chief of Police in a bid to stamp out such boorish conduct, with football then becoming so boring that its fans flock to the ballet instead.

Football Crazy

The Goodies are asked to assist in discovering who is stealing the Beefeaters' beef.

Beefeaters

In response to a proposed appalling BBC film (for schoolchildren, mark you) on S-E-X education, Mrs. Desiree Carthorse - the self-proclaimed most powerful person in the field of television, if not the world, enlists The Goodies to make her version: 'How to Make Babies by Doing Dirty Things'.

Gender Education

A wrong turn to Skegness sees the Goodies winning the Tour de France cycling race, so they decide to also enter Le Mans and convert their disused railway station office into a car.

The Race

Bill is fired from the Goodies' newspaper for being a hopeless reporter and after he is rejected by the love of his life, he decides to end it all by entering the Eurovision Raving Loony Contest.

Cunning Stunts

The strange alien abductions of trombonists prompt Bill to solve the mystery.

U-Friend or UFO?

Tim's Uncle King Arthur (actually Arthur King, but appearing as 'King, Arthur' in the phone book) is away on holiday and the Goodies have to look after his home, firstly turning it into a tourist attraction, then having to defend it from the clutches of the local town planner.

Camelot

The punk phenomenon grips Britain as even grannies reject niceness.

Punky Business

The Goodies take a job helping out at a stately home, and meet sweet Cecily, who is not all that she seems...

Cecily

Musicians are being kidnapped all over the country, so The Goodies become famous musicians too, eventually get stolen and come face-to-face with their arch-enemy - The Music Master.

Music Lovers

The Goodies are forced to emigrate to South Africa where the absence of black people forces a new form of segregation called apart-height, mainly affecting short people like jockeys and Bill.

South Africa

Tim becomes an animal rights activist, so Bill becomes a vegetable rights activist and a Watership Down parody ensues.

Animals

The Goodies help a suicidal zookeeper to locate a monster for London Zoo's Snowdon Monster House.

The Loch Ness Monster

The Goodies need a new office, but after being ripped off in the local estate agent they decide to build their own - a Graeme designed mobile disused railway station.

The New Office

The Goodies agree to be Britain's team in the Winter Olympics at the North Pole (there's apparently been a lot of snow there recently).

The Winter Olympics

A timid policeman needs the Goodies' help in boosting his tally of arrests, but their fiendishly cunning bank robbery sees them locked away in prison and desperate to escape.

Goodies in the Nick

An invitation to an eisteddfod in Wales has the Goodies in all sorts of trouble with the Reverend after they dare to break many of the puritanical local laws and actually try to entertain people.

Wacky Wales

Disgusted by Tim and Graeme's love of hunting, Bill vows to protect the last dodo.

Dodonuts

The Goodies set off to the Canadian Rockies in search of the mythical Arthur C. Clarke, but find all sorts of other weird creatures including the legendary Bigfoot.

Big Foot

A bad experience with the hospital system forces the Goodies to become doctors themselves and attempt to fix up the health system with the help of Graeme's magic elixir.

Hospital for Hire

A concert featuring many of The Goodies' best known songs, including Cactus in my Y-Fronts, Funky Gibbon, Black Pudding Bertha, Bounce, Last Chance Dance and Wild Thing.

The Goodies - Almost Live

The Goodies are grown-up babies who are sent off to boarding school during the war years, and are asked by Churchill to go behind enemy lines to buy him a box of German cigars.

War Babies

The failure to find any kids willing to go to an adventure school forces the Goodies to attend disguised as children, only to find that the school is being used for a far more sinister cause.

Way Outward Bound

Graeme discovers an ancient tunnel below the Goodies' office and his penchant for potholing soon finds them stuck inside the stomach of a tyrannosaurus rex.

The Stone Age

Graeme has established a rest home for clapped-out old animals and is sent a pantomime horse, which Tim trains before it is callously stolen by Bill to enter in the Grand National.

Black and White Beauty

The Goodies find themselves living next door to Snow White and the seven dwarfs.

Snow White 2

The land is covered in pollution and the Goodies suspect corruption.

Pollution

Asked to be part of a formation dancing team, the Goodies find that dancing isn't as gentle and pure as they thought, especially when they encounter Delia Capone and her corrupt team.

Dancing

The Goodies' bid to win the Nice Person of the Year Award is being sabotaged by the mysterious Dr. Petal and his evil robot doubles of them and other famous people.

Double Trouble

Graeme's urge to recreate an early Viking expedition and find the Lost Island Of Munga sees the Goodies shipwrecked and at the mercy of an old foe from a previous show.

For Those in Peril on the Sea

Cod have become so scarce that there is nothing to make fish fingers from.

Lips, or Almighty Cod

The futuristic sons of the Goodies have become bored with the extremely violent forms of modern entertainment and seek to revive something truly civilised from their fathers' era - cricket.

2001 and a Bit

Bill's 40th birthday makes the Goodies decide to close the business due to old age.

Change of Life

Disgusted at the awful cuisine served up at Ye Olde Shepherds Restaurant, the Goodies head to the farm of Tim's uncle for some fresh country food, only to be further disappointed upon arrival.

Farm Fresh Food

Goodies Holidays is creating an exciting mystery tour aboard the Orient Express for the Detectives Club, but things go astray when the train is hijacked and taken to the Le Boring Contest.

Daylight Robbery on the Orient Express

The revised Royal Variety Show hosted by Graeme is so well received by the royal family that they enter showbiz but end up in hospital, requiring the Goodies to act as their replacements.

Royal Command

The Goodies are hired to improve the image of the police with the general public.

Give Police a Chance

Witch Hazel's problems with casting spells leads the Goodies to help her to contact lost souls via a seance, and Graeme's mystical powers eventually see him turned into a gibbon.

That Old Black Magic

Tim has become rather flabby while the others have been away fishing, but trims himself down thanks to a brainwashing radio DJ and enters the Miss Housewife of the Year Contest.

Chubby Chumps

In 55AD the early Goodies venture to Rome to provide entertainment for the fruit-fancying Emperor, but are eventually confronted by Attila the Hun and the invading Barbarians.

Rome Antics

Due to dire financial conditions, Bill is fired and replaced with a baby robot; however Tim and Graeme need help with raising it and hire a strange, bearded, Swedish nanny.

Robot

The Goodies are asked to recover some sexually explicit photographs of politicians.

Playgirl Club

Tim's crusade to stop rich Americans from buying all of Britain's art treasures sees him bidding a huge amount of money for one painting, forcing the Goodies to take drastic action to pay for it.

For Art's Sake

The Goodies are asked to find Professor Knutts who went missing whilst leading an expedition to find the Lost Tribe of the Orinoco in 1951. They eventually find him - in Sevenoaks.

The Lost Tribe

Appalled at the offensive songs in the hit parade, the Goodies perform a sickly sweet song on the Maxie Grease Show, but Bill is exploited and turned into a superstar by an unscrupulous agent.

Superstar

A supposedly relaxing holiday in the seaside village of Dunsquabblin turns very stressful when the Goodies are trapped inside for 17 days due to heavy rain and snow.

Holiday

The Goodies are bouncing on space hoppers from London to Brighton for charity. However, they continue to bounce on around the world much to the horror of their tight-fisted sponsor.

Charity Bounce AKA London to Brighton

Tim is off to spend the weekend at Tally-Ho Towers with his rich Great Uncle Butcher-Fitzsimmons. He is dressed as a Guardsman in the hope that this will impress the old man into leaving him all his money in his will. Bill and Graeme think this is despicable, disgusting - and a very good idea, so they invite themselves along.

Hunting Pink

A historical look back at the ancestors of the Goodies; Celtic Kilty (Graeme), County Cutie (Tim) and Kinda Kinky (Bill) and how they were captured by the evil television slave traders.

Alternative Roots

The Goodies take part in the Commonwealth Games as the British team against the August Bank Holiday Islands - with the entire Commonwealth at stake.

Commonwealth Games

The Goodies go on holiday to a Cornish village that has been subjected to military takeover.

The Greenies

The British Olympic team is broke. Tim joins them and competes against Graeme and Bill's Rest of the World team.

A Kick in the Arts

Bill reports Graeme and Tim to the Women's Liberation Front after he disapproves of their treatment of Graeme's new totty. As a punishment, they are sent to work for Lord Charles (a male chauvinist) - Graeme as the butler and Tim as the maid.

Free to Live

Graeme's pet shop has a special new line - people dressed up as animals, but they also suffer from being dumped so Tim sets up a protection society, while Graeme cruelly puts the strays to work.

Animals are People Too

A British television comedy series of the 1970s and early 1980s, combining surreal sketches and situation comedy.

All Episodes of The Goodies

Season 1

Radio Goodies

Season 1 Episode 7 - Aired 12/20/1970

Snooze

Season 1 Episode 2 - Aired 11/15/1970

Beefeaters

Season 1 Episode 1 - Aired 11/8/1970

Cecily

Season 1 Episode 6 - Aired 12/13/1970

Give Police a Chance

Season 1 Episode 3 - Aired 11/22/1970

Playgirl Club

Season 1 Episode 4 - Aired 11/29/1970

The Greenies

Season 1 Episode 5 - Aired 12/6/1970