The Best Episodes of Big Train

Episode Rankings

1. #1 Fan Favorite
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   7.8/10(70 votes)

   #1 - Episode 1

   S2:E11/7/2002

   Flamenco dancers are used to defuse car bombs and a tortoise speaks fluent French.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews
2. 

   7.6/10(59 votes)

   #2 - Episode 3

   S2:E31/21/2002

   Dracula and the Werewolf discuss co-worker the Mummy and Beefeaters riot on the streets.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews
3. 

   7.5/10(84 votes)

   #3 - Episode 2

   S1:E211/16/1998

   Unwilling policeman; something's spooked the jockeys; My Name is Paul, I'm 52-and-a-half-years-old; (costume) cat and mouse fight; jockeys in the will being preyed-upon by The Artist Formerly Known as Prince; "I've turned into a ventriloquist's dummy"; Stare-Out Stare-Break; Small Train, Big Hand, Size-Perception Issues; horse suicide; dating agency - going for the opposite to normal type of date; postman-hitman; hypnotists; Stare-Out Richard Gere; uh-huh-huh, hu-huh, uh-uh-uh-huh-huh.

   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Peter Baynham, Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Peter Baynham, Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews
4. 

   7.5/10(71 votes)

   #4 - Episode 5

   S1:E512/7/1998

   A visit from Darryl Hall and John Oates to a deprived council estate causes as much anger as optimism. A daredevil embarks on some crazy antics and Chairman Mao is in 'Top of the Pops' mode. The World Stare-Out Championships features Wallace versus Popstopolous.

   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews
5. 

   7.5/10(71 votes)

   #5 - Episode 6

   S1:E612/14/1998

   The World Stare-Out Championships reach a thrilling climax as Kampagnola takes on Spatsky. Florence Nightingale is shown in a whole new light, a group of office workers react to the appointment of their new boss and Chairman Mao is found in another unusual setting.

   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews
6. 

   7.4/10(75 votes)

   #6 - Episode 4

   S1:E411/30/1998

   The difficulties of being a police sketch artist are uncovered and there is an alternative interpretation of the famous film 'Matter of Life'. Adolf Hitler is in an unusually jovial frame of mind and the World Stare-Out Championships continue with Nanak versus Duran.

   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews
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7. 

   7.3/10(105 votes)

   #7 - Episode 1

   S1:E111/9/1998

   Woman asks for directions in France in English; the boss who continually escapes his employees chasing-up of owed bonuses; the Inquisition; the 43rd stare-out world championships, disturbed by a streaker; Jesus vs. Satan (office bullying); radio dj using child slave labour for puns; The Bee Gees gunfight with Chaka Khan; surgeon taking a call at an inappropriate moment; childlike adults dressed for the hunt but wanting to be firemen.

   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Peter Baynham, Graham Linehan, Kevin Cecil, Arthur Mathews, Andy Riley

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   Director:Graham Linehan

   Writers:Peter Baynham, Graham Linehan, Kevin Cecil, Arthur Mathews, Andy Riley
8. 

   7.3/10(64 votes)

   #8 - Episode 2

   S2:E21/14/2002

   A tale of love involving a potato and the first television screening of a classic.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews
9. 

   7.3/10(59 votes)

   #9 - Episode 4

   S2:E41/28/2002

   A babysitter gets more than she bargained for when she looks after Dame Margot Fontaine.

   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews

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   Director:Unknown

   Writer:Arthur Mathews
10. 

    7.3/10(60 votes)

    #10 - Episode 5

    S2:E52/4/2002

    Budding writer Adolf Hitler takes his first book to the publisher.

    Director:Unknown

    Writer:Arthur Mathews

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    Director:Unknown

    Writer:Arthur Mathews
11. 

    7.2/10(56 votes)

    #11 - Episode 6

    S2:E62/11/2002

    The merits of programmes are discussed by a panel of late-night pundits.

    Director:Unknown

    Writer:Arthur Mathews

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    Director:Unknown

    Writer:Arthur Mathews
12. 

    7.1/10(76 votes)

    #12 - Episode 3

    S1:E311/23/1998

    Missing Persons Appeal on a fairground ride; Dr. Jekyll and Very Tart; 43rd World Stare-Out Championships; Misters; Ming the Domesticated; Nuns in Captivity; fake psychiatrist; Professor BBQ Pictures; Ming the Unwell; permanent squirrel costume; The Monks and The Johnny; Shakespeare Lookalikes; fake magician; teaching son to ride his bike with varying successes; the hymnast.

    Director:Graham Linehan

    Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews

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    Director:Graham Linehan

    Writers:Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews