Sketches: - Cops - Dream: Bust the queen while drinking tea. - Crushing Hospital: Mr. Tyzik is injured and must undergo physical therapy. - Cops - Dad: Don't love my dad. - Daddy Drank: The story of how daddy drank. - The Leash #1: The slave and master on the street. - Cops - Shelley Long: Enough said. - Knocked Out: A guy knocks himself out. - The Leash #2: Shelly Long. - The Last Straw: Gavin pesters his mother while she's on the phone. - Parenting: Disillusioned parents hold a press conference. - Dead Dad: The Kids discuss beating up their fathers.

Sketches: - Cops - O Canada: Our home and native land. - Trapper: The daily hunt begins. - Cabbage Head - Old Friends: Cabbage Head at it again. - It's Not Working Out #1: Chris is fired. - The Loner: ...And his toe. - It's Not Working Out #2: Chris is fired... again. - Simon & Hecubus: In the Pit of Ultimate Darkness. - It's Not Working Out #3: Chris is fired... one more time. - Girls Of Summer: Coach Buddy does it again.

Puppy won't do tricks; a man who dresses his best to get the paper; a sleepwalking boy steals his dad's money; a restaurant that has a relationship section.

A magical flying pig. The Best Actor award at the Oscars results. An axe murderer politely asks an old lady if he can borrow her axe. Men wear earrings in the 90s.

This Season 5 Best-Of Compilation features fan-favorite sketches: God is Dead, Chicken Lady at the Mall, Hillbilly's Problem, The Convenience Store Worker, Meet Your New Male Slave, and Disgusting Old Man.

Sketches: - Spring: What a man likes about spring. - Comfortable: How comfortable are these couples? - Trucker #2: Truck Owner makes a phone call. - Hard Day: An undercover alien overreacts to innocent questions. - Off Swingin': One cool cat. - The Doctor: How far can you coast on just charm? - Bobby & The Devil: Bobby has a guitar fight with Satan.

Sketches: - M. Piedlourde Donne Un Cuop De Pied An Ballon: Speaks for itself. - Scott's Not Gay: Panic! - First Time: Melanie has a date. - Bad News: He's kinda evil. - Poo Guy: Bruce is the Poo Guy - M. Piedlourde A Une Rende-Vous: Speaks for itself. - Victim: A guy who apparently wants to get beaten up. - Night Of The Cow: The story of the Night of the Cow. - M. Piedlourde Sur La Lune: Speaks for itself.

Sketches: Fact #1: Episode 213 - Stars- Bruce - Recurring Characters- It's a Fact Girl - In short- Her uncle Tony can spit really far. Headcrusher - Rival: Episode 217 - Stars- Kevin, Mark - Recurring Characters- Mr. Tyzik aka "The Headcrusher" - In short- There can be only one. Off Swingin': Episode 201 - Stars- n/a - Recurring Characters- n/a - In Short- The most handsome man in the world. Daddy Drank: Episode 209 - Stars- Dave, Kevin - Recurring Characters- n/a - In Short- A story about how Daddy drank. The Affair: Episode 214 - Stars- Bruce, Kevin, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters- Darrill - In short- Story of the secret affair. Fact #2 - Queen's ABC's: Episode 211 - Stars- Scott - Recurring Characters- It's a Fact Girl, Queen - In short- The Queen sings her ABCs. The Doctor: Episode 201 - Stars- Dave - Recurring Characters- Bad Doctor - In short- He's not boosting, he's just stating a fact. A Little Something: Episode 203 - Stars- Bruce, Scott - Recurring Characters- Don - In short- Executive has cucumber salad on face. Fact #4 - Neighbors: Episode 213 - Stars- n/a - Recurring Characters- It's a Fact Girl - In short- Her neighbors have been in love for forty-five years. First Time: Episode 215 - Stars- Kevin, Mark - Recurring Characters- Melanie - In short- Melanie has her date over in her parent's bedroom. Girls Of Summer: Episode 202 - Stars- Dave, Bruce, Kevin, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters- Buddy Cole, Shona, Patty - In short- Buddy manages the Sappho Sluggers.

Sketches: Cops - Prisoner: Episode 205 - Stars- Bruce, Mark - Recurring Characters- Cops - In short- Suspect is locked in car. Comfortable: Episode 201 - Stars- Dave, Mark, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- Nina Spudkneeyak, Nina's husband - In short- Nina's husband makes a "pass" at his old friend's wife. Trapper: Episode 202 - Stars- Dave, Mark, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- Francois, Jacques - In short- The French-Canadian trappers who trap businessmen for their suits. Painting A Chair: Episode 207 - Stars- Bruce, Mark - Recurring Characters- Gavin - In Short- There's this guy and he's paintin' a chair. Cops - Shootout: 205 - Stars- Bruce, Mark - Recurring Characters- Cops - In short- A standoff outside a house. Chicken Lady: Episode 205 - Stars- Dave, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters- Chicken Lady - In short- Man answers her personal ad. Simon & Hecubus: Episode 202 - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Mark - Recurring Characters- Sir Simon Milligan, Hecubus, Satan - In short- Hecubus proves he is impolite and evil; Satan likes the show. Cops - Dad: Episode 209 - Stars- Bruce, Mark - Recurring Characters- Cops - In short- Never told his Dad he loved him. Hazy Movie: Episode 220 - Stars- Dave, Scott - Recurring Characters- Francesca Fiore, Bruno Puntz Jones - In Short- Man in a bar tries to explain a Francesca Fiore movie. Eating In The Shower: Episode 210 - Stars- Kevin - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- Over the credits, Kevin eats in the shower.

The feathers go flying when the Chicken Lady spots Rooster Boy; Cabbie has his own set of road rules; some cops have more important things to discuss than a dead body.

A construction worker firmly denies sleeping on the job; Bruce discovers that he is only 17 inches tall.

An open letter addressed to the guy who stole a bike wheel and a letter addressed to the people who stood by and watched.

Scott's clone won't stop misbehaving. A man shows his girlfriend a dead body in a field. Mark has to fill in for the Fact Girl while she's on strike.

Poems by the Emperor of Japan; Brice's advice for breaking into showbiz.

Celebrating Scott's 100th portrayal of a waiter; Hecubus is fired and rehired; a wife walks in on her husband and a thief in bed.

Skits include: "Multiple Weddings," "Cabbie Bigot" and "My Pen!"

Skits include: "Chicken Lady at a Strip Bar," "Queen Speaks to Canada" and "Bar Fight.".

Crazy Dad (KD)-A man tells a story about his dad locking him up for 10 years, but as a cruel joke. Chicken Lady Goes Home (all)-The chicken lady visits her old house (Chicken Lady, Tucker, Bearded Lady) Assistant Fired (MB)-The 45-year-old man fires his assistant (45 guy) Mixed Up Names (DS)-The bad doctor mixes up files at the hospital (bad doctor) 7 Things To Do (KD)-"Gotta keep on top of my life" (Thug a.k.a. Inept Hitman) Interviewing New Assistant (BM)-He doesn't get the job. He slobbered on the guy's joint. (45 year old guy) Hiring Assistant (B)-He finds a new assistant (45 year old guy) Judy & Fran (DBS)-They meet the new widow (Fran, Gordon, Judy)

Receptionist • Walk A Mile In My Shoes • Cops - Rookie Trick Question • A Soulfulness They Never Had • Cops - Rookie Coffee • Answering Machine • Celebrity • Cops - Rookie Puke • Divorce Court

Skits: Fiore Parfums Commercial - Stars- Scott - Recurring Characters- Francesca Fiore - In short- Smell like a bitch. Things To Do - Stars- Dave, Kevin - Recurring Characters- Thug - In Short- He's gotta keep on top of his life and on top of his schedule. Art Collector - Stars- Bruce, Mark - Recurring Characters- Shirling Guy - In short- Man negotiates the price for a piece of "art" to add to his collection. Who's Hot and Who's Not - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- Smitty, Butch, Riley - In short- They guy-watch from the steps. Night I Connected With My Dog - Stars- Bruce - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- Bruce connects with a dog for which he previously felt nothing. The Life of Cyril St. John - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- A 70s-style documentary on an escape artist. Gay Marriage - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- Smitty, Butch, Riley - In short- They

Skits: Inexperienced Cannibal - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- He didn't get on the plane expecting to eat anyone. Try it NOW! - Stars- Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- Danny Husk, Danny's Wife - In short- Maybe the uh spark plugs aren't firing. Sock Puppet - Stars- Dave, Scott - Recurring Characters- Jocelyn, Maudre - In Short- It's for nervous johns. Do Re Mi - Stars- Dave, Bruce, Kevin, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- Turning that frown upside down. Anal Probing Aliens - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Mark - Recurring Characters- Tucker - In short- Alien questions the point to his work. Transvestite - Stars- Dave, Scott - Recurring Characters- Jocelyn, Maudre - In short- A man wants to know if Maudre is one. Answering Machine - Stars- Bruce, Kevin - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- Husband and wife make their answering machine greeting. Chicken Lady Goes Home - Stars- Dave, Bruce,

End of the Beginning (P)(5): Bellini listens to the radio (Paul Bellini) • Armada Grows Old (MBK)(5): Armada sees the future (Armada) • The Sixth Kid (all)(5): Jeff Berman tribute • Buddy's Bar - Closure (S)(5): Buddy closes the bar • On Censorship (KDB)(5): ""recap"" of censored episodes • A.T. Buyout (all)(5): Everyone is fired (Cathy, Kathie, Tanya, Ms. Ferguson, Secretary, A.T. Boss) • Burial (all+P)(5): the boys are buried and Bellini speaks! (Paul Bellini)

Sign of Loneliness, Networking, Lopez 1, Fat Hitch-Hiker, Lopez 2, No Regrets, The Lamp, Lopez 3, Indian Woman, Lopez 4 Sketches: - Signs Of Loneliness: What's happening in the lonely city. - Networking: Gerald and Gerald network at a business party. - Lopez #1: Man calls out for Lopez outside of a house. - Fat Hitch-hiker: Man gives a "fat" guy a lift. - Lopez #2: Lopez continued. - No Regrets: Man criticizes donut shop customers. - The Lamp: Man who has to call the wife of a man who was killed by a lamp. - Lopez #3: Lopez continued. - Indian Woman: Boy who has decided to become an Indian woman. - Lopez #4: Credits.

Sketches: Death Row: Episode 115 - Stars- Dave, Bruce, Kevin, Mark - Recurring Characters- Melanie - In short- Girls discuss cutest boy on death row. Banker Doesn't Like Us: Episode 108 - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- "Nobody Likes Us" Guys - In Short- They can't get a loan because Elinor doesn't like them. Buddy's Better: Episode 102 - Stars- Scott - Recurring Characters- Buddy Cole - In short- Buddy comments on what "they say" about the races. Crushing Your Head #2: Episode 101 - Stars- Dave, Bruce, Mark, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- Mr. Tiscic aka Mr. Tyzik aka the Headcrusher - In Short- The Headcrusher crushes businessmen's heads. Citizen Kane: Episode 103 - Stars- Bruce, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- n/a - In Short- It was Citizen Kane...or maybe it was Psycho. Car Ride: Episode 119 - Stars- Bruce - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- The $300 car. Womyn: Episode #102 - Stars- Dave, B

Sketches: - Cops - Good Cop/Bad Cop: They're getting the hang of it. - Brad & The Phone: A guy calls for phone sex. - Fact #1: Uncle Tony. - Book, Bottle, Blonde: A story of a guy who writes children's books. - Cops - Money: Best thing about being a cop. - Shoes: Evan the intense shoe salesman. - Evil T: Maybe it's the letters? - Fact #5: Bigfoot Singing. - Heckler: Mississippi Gary is heckled. - Fact #4: Neighbors in love. - The Long Note: The Kids visit Bruce as he recovers from his suicide attempt.