Alf decides to earn some money by window cleaning for Mrs. Carey. Despite failing to get any wages, he gets lots of free groceries after catching the milkman in a compromising position.

As Alf's wedding to Camille approaches, the preparations unfold: gift giving, Alf's stag night, and finally the big event itself.

As a result of a power cut, Alf and Camille repair to the candlelit pub where Alf sounds off about Margaret Thatcher, despite her being a Conservative. This sets off an argument with Arthur and Mr. Johnson about a number of things – including death, the undertaker at the next table unsettling Alf.

Complaining that Alf is a shabby dresser, Camille also wants him to take out life insurance in case he goes first. At the pub, a discussion on health does anything but allay Mr. Carey's fears about getting a hip replacement in view of Alf's hospital horror stories.

Alf tries his hand with man's best friend, much to Fred Johnson's delight, but who's taking who for a walk?

Gwenneth and Min come to visit Alf, and hold a seancé to communicate with some long departed friends.

Alf has a fight at a tea dance and meets up again with his adversary outside his house.

On a boiling hot summer day, Alf goes to Social Security to complain that he should've had more money in last winter's heating allowance to no avail. Back home, he joins his friends watching cricket on television and falls asleep, loudly dreaming that he has been knighted for his services to the game.

They may be halfway up the aisle but Alf and his bride-to-be are still arguing, especially when she wants to throw out his furniture as being tat. A fake overdose attempt cuts no ice so Alf is off to the pub to talk about suicide, death and Heaven – though Fred Johnson, as an atheist, is having none of it.

Camille is forcing Alf to try and save money for their wedding. That includes no smoking and no drinking.

Initially delighted when summoned for jury service, Alf becomes increasingly paranoid that he is being stalked.

As jury service draws closer, Alf is worried about the possibility of revenge from the criminal fraternity.

Alf forgets his pass and is unable to get on the bus. The following day, he arranges a day trip for a group of OAP's who, armed with their passes, commandeer a bus.

Alf's joy at Rita's pending divorce is short lived when he learns she is to live with the new doctor.

The arrival of Alf's AIDS leaflets spurs him and Arthur into action to aid Mary Whitehouse.

When Alf is given a cordless telephone, it turns out to be more of hindrance than help.

Alf and Else Garnett are back in London. Else is severely arthritic and can barely walk and Alf extols the joys of the wheelchair has got her — until he has to push her around in it. With so many cars parked on the pavement, he uses the middle of the road, incurring a motorist's wrath. It gets him access to sports matches — at least until he spoils it for himself.

Having complained about his failing eyesight – and just about everything else – Alf takes Else out in her wheelchair and buys her a cornet whilst avoiding giving money to the vicar. However, his poor sight proves his undoing when he accidentally goes into a ladies' toilet and is arrested as a sex pest.

After scrubbing the hall and disapproving of Else's using the milkman to place bets, Alf feels that an entitlement to home help, but antagonises three hopefuls in succession. Returning from the pub, he finds that the latest is Winston, an extremely flamboyant gay Black man who will clearly tolerate none of his nonsense.

Alf tests the patience of the good-natured Johnsons from next door by using their phone to make a very long-winded long distance call to Rita. After expounding upon funerals in the pub, Alf repays Mr Johnson by buying him so many drinks he falls over. Meanwhile, Alf's homeward progress pushing Else in her wheelchair ends in drunken calamity.

Rita comes to visit and no sooner is she through the door than Alf argues with her about Else. After Alf criticises Margaret Thatcher, claiming that no woman should be PM, Else and Rita gang up against him with Winston, who brings an equally camp friend home to throw a party for Rita.

Tired of pushing Else around in her chair, Alf looks into an electric scooter but they cost £2,500 and Social Security informs Alf that, as long as he's able to push, Else is ineligible. Taking an idea from some go-karting kids, Alf adds jet propulsion to the chair, which goes out of control, foiling a bank robbery and landing him in hospital. He's declared a hero but, following Winston's view that the robbers' accomplices may be out to get him, decides to remain anonymous.

Alf returns from the funeral of Else, his long-suffering wife. Having lost her disability allowance of E30 and half the pension, life ahead is not too rosy.

When Rita and Winston come in at night making a noise, Camille decides to start locking the flats' door at 10:30. But can Alf make it back from the pub in time?

Camille's obsession with locking doors takes on new dimensions when she even locks Alf into his own flat but then he needs to go to toilet. Meanwhile, the shopkeeper wants to call in Elsa's debts, and the milkman has some news about her gambling.