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The Best Episodes of 'Allo 'Allo!

Every episode of 'Allo 'Allo! ranked from best to worst. Let's dive into the Best Episodes of 'Allo 'Allo!!

Binge this in 1d 16h•Peaking at 8.7/10

The misadventures of hapless cafe owner René Artois and his escapades with the Resistance in occupied France.

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Episode Rankings

  1. #1 Fan Favorite
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    'Allo 'Allo! Season 9 Episode 6 - A Winkle in Time
    8.7/10(270 votes)

    #1 - A Winkle in Time

    S9:E6

    René and the café staff prepare to welcome the invading British troops.

    Director:John B. Hobbs
    Writers:Jeremy Lloyd, Paul Adam

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  2. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 3 Episode 3 - The Sausage in the Wardrobe
    8.6/10(319 votes)

    #2 - The Sausage in the Wardrobe

    S3:E3

    After Maria is sent to Lieutenant Gruber with the sausage containing the real painting of the Fallen Madonna for copying, she is caught by General Von Klinkerhoffen, who places the sausage in his wardrobe and holds Maria hostage until his motor mower engine is returned by the Resistance. Herr Flick, the Colonel, the Captain and René hear about this and decide to go to the chateau through the secret passage and steal the sausage from under the General's nose, using Helga, Yvette and Lieutenant Gruber as a honey trap.

    Directors:David Croft, Robin Carr
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  3. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 3 Episode 6 - The Great Un-Escape
    8.3/10(298 votes)

    #3 - The Great Un-Escape

    S3:E6

    While the Captain is sitting in the café, Herr Flick of the Gestapo is listening when René is talking to London on the wireless. He soon cracks the code of the message as the plan to dig a tunnel from the mortuary to hide the British airmen. But it's soon apparent that the two airmen and Monsieur Alphonse need help with the digging, and the café staff are called in, leaving Madame Fanny and Leclerc in the café. But the Colonel and the Captain follow René, discover the tunnel, and are captured in the prisoner-of-war camp.

    Directors:David Croft, Robin Carr
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  4. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 9 - Watch the Birdie
    8.3/10(226 votes)

    #4 - Watch the Birdie

    S5:E9

    René and his staff prepare the long-distance duck for its vital flight to England.

    Director:Susan Belbin
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  5. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 23 - An Enigma Variation
    8.3/10(224 votes)

    #5 - An Enigma Variation

    S5:E23

    Chaos engulfs René as he attempts to hide the stolen gold. Meanwhile, the Resistance plan to steal the Enigma encoder.

    Director:Richard Boden
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  6. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 1 Episode 4 - The Execution
    8.2/10(357 votes)

    #6 - The Execution

    S1:E4

    Hans mistakes the nitro for gin and accidentally blows up the railway himself! The Germans capture René, Yvette, and the peasant-disguised Colonel and Captain. As Helga, Leclerc, and Edith each attempt to help the gang escape, General Von Klinkerhoffen arrives in town and demands that the only known saboteur be shot. This means René's death by firing squad, with Lieutenant Gruber in charge of the squad!

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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    The 20 WORST Episodes of 'Allo 'Allo!

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  7. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 1 Episode 5 - The Funeral
    8.2/10(354 votes)

    #7 - The Funeral

    S1:E5

    René tries to go back to his normal life after his fake execution, posing as his twin brother, also named René, but the funeral arrangements are difficult when there is no body. Monsieur Leclerc is cheaper than the regular priest and the coffin is filled with anti-tank bombs.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  8. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 2 Episode 6 - Herr Flick's Revenge
    8.2/10(304 votes)

    #8 - Herr Flick's Revenge

    S2:E6

    Having ran away from the duel with Monsieur Alphonse, René hides. He's rescued by Michelle of the Resistance who smuggles him back into the café dressed as a member of the Resistance, while she explains to Monsieur Alphonse that René is the bravest man in France. But Herr Flick has captured the Colonel and the Captain, and brings in René as well, and threatens to torture them unless they reveal where the painting of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies is hidden. They are rescued by General Von Klinkerhoffen. With life back to normal, there's only the matter of getting the British airmen out. As the General imposes a curfew, Michelle's plan is a funeral for Madame Fanny.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  9. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 4 Episode 5 - The Sausage in the Trousers
    8.2/10(260 votes)

    #9 - The Sausage in the Trousers

    S4:E5

    There are still no batteries for the wireless radio underneath the bed of René's mother-in-law, so Michelle's newest harebrained scheme is to have René and Yvette powering it with the generator from a bicycle until the stolen batteries from a German miniature submarine are delivered. The Lieutenant has finished copying the paintings (The Fallen Madonna and the Van Gogh) and delivers them as sausages. Numerous other sausages also arrive: real ones from Captain Bertorelli, submarine batteries from Leclerc, and explosives from Officer Crabtree, and soon they're all mixed up in the German officers' trousers!

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  10. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 26 - All in Disgeese
    8.2/10(235 votes)

    #10 - All in Disgeese

    S5:E26

    René is still harbouring the German Enigma machine as well as the four bars of gold he has stolen, two British airmen and the painting of the Cracked Vase with the Big Daisies by Van Gogh. So the café is now full and getting more crowded by the minute.

    Director:Richard Boden
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  11. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 2 Episode 3 - The Policeman Cometh
    8.1/10(313 votes)

    #11 - The Policeman Cometh

    S2:E3

    We pick up the action mere moments after the close of the previous episode, as the airmen-filled cow narrowly escapes being milked by a German patrol while awaiting the landing of the plane. As they watch in disappointment, the plane does not land, and instead jettisoning two parachutes, one of which yields a new escape package; the other, Officer Crabtree, sent from "British Ontelligence Headquitters". Disguised as a policeman, he is supposed to blend in. Unfortunately, his French is abominable, getting the vowels wrong as often as not. Meanwhile, the plan to blow up the non-painting-filled knockwurst on its way to Hitler has hit a snag: René can't find anyone to blow up the train.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  12. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 2 Episode 5 - The Duel
    8.1/10(299 votes)

    #12 - The Duel

    S2:E5

    René tries to hide from the seconds of Monsieur Alphonse, the undertaker, but in his stead Lieutenant Gruber accepts the duel. However, the Colonel and the Captain want to save René and plan an exercise to "accidentally" kill Monsieur Alphonse. The plan is thwarted by Herr Flick, who has discovered that the sausage that was sent to Berlin containing the painting of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies did not contain any painting – either real or fake. Herr Flick correctly assumes that the Colonel and the Captain stole the painting, and arrests them and cancels the exercise. Now René has to fight the duel on his own, while Yvette and Maria grieve on the sidelines and his wife Edith catches up on the gossip of the week.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  13. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 3 Episode 5 - Pretty Maids All in a Row
    8.1/10(286 votes)

    #13 - Pretty Maids All in a Row

    S3:E5

    After the plot to get the two British airmen out failed, a frustrated René returns to the painting of the Fallen Madonna. He hides it behind an ugly painting in his café which is immediately recognised by General Von Klinkerhoffen as a Van Gogh and requisitioned for his office in the chateau. He also requisitions the two new maids in Café René – or as they are better known: the two British airmen in disguise. Realising that the two airmen will be recognised right away, Michelle of the Resistance comes up with another harebrained scheme of digging a tunnel from Monsieur Alphonse's mortuary into the prisoner-of-war camp and smuggling in the two airmen.

    Directors:David Croft, Robin Carr
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  14. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 10 - René - Under an Assumed Nose
    8.1/10(229 votes)

    #14 - René - Under an Assumed Nose

    S5:E10

    Monsieur Leclerc comes to the rescue when orders are given for René to be arrested. René tries to escape using a unique disguise.

    Director:Susan Belbin
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  15. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 11 - The Confusion of the Generals
    8.1/10(223 votes)

    #15 - The Confusion of the Generals

    S5:E11

    René is in even more trouble as the generals gather round at the chateau.

    Director:Susan Belbin
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  16. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 21 - Flight to Geneva
    8.1/10(222 votes)

    #16 - Flight to Geneva

    S5:E21

    René tries to sneak off to Switzerland with Yvette on the night train.

    Director:Richard Boden
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  17. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 5 Episode 22 - Train of Events
    8.1/10(217 votes)

    #17 - Train of Events

    S5:E22

    René attempts to sneak off to Switzerland with Yvette and four gold bars, but discovers the Resistance are intending to blow up their train.

    Director:Richard Boden
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  18. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 6 Episode 1 - Desperate Doings in the Graveyard
    8.1/10(223 votes)

    #18 - Desperate Doings in the Graveyard

    S6:E1

    The latest escape plan for the British airmen involves them wading along the canal underneath a tin bath. Herr Flick and Von Smallhausen pose as escaped British airmen, hoping to be picked up by the Resistance. The Resistance have built a communication post in René's 'grave', in an effort to get around German jamming of their radio signals. René, Edith and Monsieur Alphonse try it out. René gets caught on the aerial and is hoisted above his 'grave'. Lieutenant Gruber sees him and thinks it's the ghost of René's 'twin brother'.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  19. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 1 Episode 2 - Pigeon Post
    8.0/10(380 votes)

    #19 - Pigeon Post

    S1:E2

    After the Colonel's and the Captain's uniforms are borrowed by the British airmen, and later burned, they have to send for replacements. Supplied by Michelle are carrier pigeons, which Madame Edith accidentally cooks and serves to Herr Otto Flick.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  20. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 1 Episode 7 - The Dance of Hitler Youth
    8.0/10(336 votes)

    #20 - The Dance of Hitler Youth

    S1:E7

    The Colonel's birthday party is the perfect opportunity to retrieve the real painting of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies from Herr Flick, and substitute it with the forgery. The plan is to not invite Herr Flick but make sure that he hears about the big binge – a traditional feast with genuine Bavarian dances featuring girls dressed as the Hitler Youth – so that he will have to come. In the meantime, René and Edith are to enter the office of Herr Flick to make the switch. Of course, they fail – which means Herr Flick now has both the fake and the original plus a second forgery, which he commissioned in order to fund his marriage with Helga after the war.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  21. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 2 Episode 1 - Six Big Boobies
    8.0/10(315 votes)

    #21 - Six Big Boobies

    S2:E1

    After the British airmen are gone for good – or so René thinks – there is still the problem of Herr Flick owning all three copies of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies (the original and two fakes), and while Herr Flick kidnaps Lieutenant Gruber (a former art house worker), the Colonel and the Captain start to plan their next move. All the while, René's widow Edith has found René's will, and being the sole beneficiary, goes on a spending spree with René's money to attract better suitors. And the British airmen return as nuns. They are last seen hidden in the piano.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  22. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 2 Episode 2 - The Wooing of Widow Artois
    8.0/10(306 votes)

    #22 - The Wooing of Widow Artois

    S2:E2

    René is caught in a dilemma when he must choose between the women he loves: his waitresses Yvette and Maria, and his wife Edith, who, as his widow, has all his money. Unfortunately, he cannot bring himself to woo Edith again, so Edith seeks the attention that she can get from other suitors in town.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  23. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 2 Episode 4 - Swiftly and With Style
    8.0/10(305 votes)

    #23 - Swiftly and With Style

    S2:E4

    After failing to destroy the train, which will take the copy of the painting of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies to Hitler, René and the Captain are captured by the Resistance, only to be rescued by Herr Flick. The Colonel and the Captain are afraid that Hitler will understand that the painting is a copy, and prepare to escape to Switzerland. In the meantime, British agent in disguise, Officer Crabtree, has a new escape plan for the British airmen.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  24. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 3 Episode 1 - The Nicked Knockwurst
    8.0/10(293 votes)

    #24 - The Nicked Knockwurst

    S3:E1

    After the Colonel makes René promise not to have further contact with the Resistance, Herr Flick's sausage (containing the forgery of the Fallen Madonna) is stolen by the Communist Resistance. The Colonel and the Captain are anxious that it isn't revealed that they have switched the paintings, and order René to come up with the ransom, which Edith gets from Monsieur Alphonse. The ransom is to be left by René and his staff, dressed as German soldiers. But the whole thing is watched by German soldiers dressed as French policemen, the Gestapo dressed as French Resistance girls, and the Colonel and the Captain dressed as trees. And of course, Lieutenant Gruber stumbles upon the meeting, and his dog can't help but chase the sausage.

    Director:David Croft
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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  25. 'Allo 'Allo! Season 3 Episode 2 - Gruber Does Some Mincing
    8.0/10(282 votes)

    #25 - Gruber Does Some Mincing

    S3:E2

    The sausage containing the painting of the Fallen Madonna, which was taken by Lieutenant Gruber's dog, is minced by the Lieutenant – but fortunately he discovers it first and saves it. At the same time, the missing knockwurst means that Monsieur Alphonse cannot get back the money which he lent to pay the ransom of the stolen sausage. The Resistance pays him back with Monsieur Leclerc's badly forged money. But after everything seems to be getting back to normal, the sausage is sent to Lieutenant Gruber to make another copy. Also, Michelle's latest plan to get the British airmen back is by an old plane with the engine from General Von Klinkerhoffen's motor mower.

    Directors:David Croft, Robin Carr
    Writers:David Croft, Jeremy Lloyd

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Best Episodes Summary

"A Winkle in Time" is the best rated episode of "'Allo 'Allo!". It scored 8.7/10 based on 270 votes. Directed by John B. Hobbs and written by Jeremy Lloyd, Paul Adam, it aired on 12/14/1992. This episode scored 0.1 points higher than the second highest rated, "The Sausage in the Wardrobe".