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#1 - Yellowcake
Season 1 Episode 1 - Aired 5/27/2010
After a client (former Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad) leaves behind a briefcase full of uranium powder known as yellowcake, Svetlana must decide on the best way to get rid of it.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#2 - Gumption
Season 1 Episode 2 - Aired 6/3/2010
Svetlana scrambles to interview and hire a new driver when her regular chauffeur quits.
Director: N/A
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#3 - Wish Fulfillment
Season 1 Episode 3 - Aired 6/10/2010
When Natasha expresses a desire to sleep with a black man, Svetlana attempts to lure one—with the help of some creative derriere augmentation.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#4 - Recession Special
Season 1 Episode 4 - Aired 6/17/2010
The Saint Petersburg House of Discreet Pleasure drops prices to attract recession-crippled customers—a move that yields unexpected turmoil.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#5 - Sex Faces
Season 1 Episode 5 - Aired 6/24/2010
Vlad applies for a job at an engineering laboratory, despite having a mostly hypothetical resumé. Meanwhile, Svetlana explores the benefits of botox injections.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#6 - Ointment
Season 1 Episode 6 - Aired 7/1/2010
Svetlana tries to avoid deportation after Steve annuls their marriage. Meanwhile, the family sets up shop in an occupied house.
Director: N/A
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#7 - You're Svencome
Season 1 Episode 7 - Aired 7/8/2010
The current resident of the house that the family has fashioned into a brothel isn't thrilled about his unwanted boarders, so Svetlana hatches a plan to extend their stay.
Director: Josh Greenbaum
Writer: N/A
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#8 - Crystal Methdown
Season 1 Episode 8 - Aired 7/15/2010
Vlad struggles with going to his first day at work while Svetlana supports Natasha's audition for a movie role. When an American girl wants to join the brothel as a prostitute Natasha must compete in a "Funtastic Fuckdown" contest.
Director: N/A
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#9 - Good Friggin Shabbes
Season 1 Episode 9 - Aired 7/22/2010
Svetlana's son Boris has been expelled from five schools due to misconduct so far. To avoid him being put into foster care, she desperately tries to get him into a Yeshiva school by pretending to be Jewish. Meanwhile, Marina's feelings for a Lesbian named Liam come to light, when she feels rejected and seeks revenge.
Director: Josh Greenbaum
Writer: N/A
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#10 - Eco-Shlong
Season 1 Episode 10 - Aired 7/29/2010
Svetlana receives a call from Michelle Obama personally asking her to make her business more energy conscious. The enterprising Svetlana decides that her brothel, St. Petersburg House of Discreet Pleasure, will invent an ecologically friendly dildo and humor ensues.
Director: Josh Greenbaum
Writer: N/A
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#11 - Throw Mama Back on the Plane
Season 1 Episode 11 - Aired 8/5/2010
Svetlana's aging mother pays a surprise visit from the old country with a seemingly impossible request.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#12 - Snatchengil for the Stars
Season 1 Episode 12 - Aired 8/12/2010
Svetlana becomes extremely jealous when she observes Vlad dancing with an attractive female acquaintance at her class. Meanwhile, Eddie resorts to drastic measures when Svetlana's old chauffeur asks for his job back.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#13 - Me Love You Decent Amount of Time
Season 2 Episode 1 - Aired 4/27/2011
An Asian brothel opens in the immediate neighborhood and draws many of Svetlana's clients away. While Svetlana fights back, her gay friend Jared investigates Vlad to determine his true sexual orientation.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#14 - Water-Board Certified
Season 2 Episode 3 - Aired 5/11/2011
Vlad is abducted by government officials and waterboarded while Svetlana tries to get rid of a negligible amount of belly weight gain.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#15 - Amerimorphation
Season 2 Episode 4 - Aired 5/18/2011
Svetlana pretends to be an all-American in order to become part of a documentary on American entrepreneurs.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#16 - Corkage Fee
Season 2 Episode 5 - Aired 5/25/2011
Svetlana turns to a plastic surgeon after her previous breast augmentation suffers a rupture. Meanwhile, Vlad makes a disastrous attempt at male prostitution. (Note: This episode features Iris Bahr in a secondary role as Sandy, a snide receptionist.)
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#17 - Mom! Dad!
Season 2 Episode 6 - Aired 6/1/2011
Liam's disapproving parents threaten to ruin her wedding to Marina, which Svetlana is busy trying to organize.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#18 - Milking It
Season 2 Episode 7 - Aired 6/8/2011
When Natasha expresses a desire to adopt a baby, Svetlana calls in a favor and arranges to have a Haitian infant delivered to the house. However, when Tomas arrives, he isn't exactly what Svetlana was anticipating.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#19 - Outta Here Like Vladimir: Part 1 "Cookies and Cream"
Season 2 Episode 8 - Aired 6/15/2011
While taking out the trash, Vlad meets a pretty neighbor, Phoebe (Wendi McLendon-Covey), and immediately dumps Svetlana for her.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#20 - Outta Here Like Vladimir: Part II "URF"
Season 2 Episode 9 - Aired 6/22/2011
Svetlana, in despair, marries Vivek, an Indian man, and is trying everything to become a good housewife. Meanwhile, Vlad finds it harder and harder to cope with his new girlfriend's nymphomaniacal tendencies.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#21 - Yearning for Zionism
Season 2 Episode 10 - Aired 6/29/2011
Svetlana tries to prevent Vlad from pimping Natasha on the streets in the middle of the night—and ends up brainwashed by a religious cult.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#22 - Bringing Up Baby
Season 2 Episode 11 - Aired 7/6/2011
When Marina and Liam announce their desire for a baby, Svetlana goes looking for a suitable sperm donor.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#23 - Look It!
Season 2 Episode 12 - Aired 7/13/2011
An exterminator contaminates the brothel with poison spray and the family goes on their first ever camping trip to get fresh air.
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
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#24 - Narnia
Season 2 Episode 2 - Aired 5/4/2011
After Eddie frames Svetlana for Phil's murder, she faces "five to life" in prison—and has trouble readjusting to civilian life after she's paroled. (Note: This episode ends with a music video entitled "Hos Before Bros," featuring music by Keith Atkins and lyrics by Kyle Perzanoski.)
Director: N/A
Writer: N/A
The Worst Episodes of Svetlana
Every episode of Svetlana ranked from worst to best. Explore the Worst Episodes of Svetlana!
Svetlana is a comedy series starring Israeli-American comedienne Iris Bahr. It premiered on HDNet on May 27, 2010 and comprises two seasons.
Genre:Comedy
Network:HDNet
Worst Episodes Summary
"Yellowcake" is the worst rated episode of "Svetlana". It scored N/A/10 based on 0 votes. Directed by N/A and written by N/A, it aired on 5/27/2010. This episode scored NaN points lower than the second lowest rated, "Gumption".