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The Best Episodes of Family Guy Season 3

Every episode of Family Guy Season 3 ranked from best to worst. Discover the Best Episodes of Family Guy Season 3!

Sick, twisted, politically incorrect and Freakin' Sweet animated series featuring the adventures of the dysfunctional Griffin family. Bumbling Peter and long-suffering Lois have three kids....
Genres:AnimationComedy
Network:FOX

Season 3 Ratings Summary

"The Thin White Line (1)" is the best rated episode of "Family Guy" season 3. It scored 8/10 based on 2489 votes. Directed by Glen Hill and written by Steve Callaghan, it aired on 7/11/2001. This episode is rated 0.4 points higher than the second-best, "Brian Does Hollywood (2)".

  • The Thin White Line (1)
    8.0/102,489 votes

    #1 - The Thin White Line (1)

    Season 3 Episode 1 - Aired 7/11/2001

    Brian's keen sense of smell gets him a job with the police department.

    Director: Glen Hill

    Writer: Steve Callaghan

  • Brian Does Hollywood (2)
    7.6/102,353 votes

    #2 - Brian Does Hollywood (2)

    Season 3 Episode 2 - Aired 7/18/2001

    Brian's first job in Hollywood is directing a pornographic film.

    Director: Gavin Dell

    Writer: Gary Janetti

  • Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington
    7.5/102,221 votes

    #3 - Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington

    Season 3 Episode 3 - Aired 7/25/2001

    The tobacco industry sends Peter to Washington to present a speech about smoking.

    Director: Brian Hogan

    Writer: Ricky Blitt

  • One if by Clam, Two if by Sea
    7.5/102,242 votes

    #4 - One if by Clam, Two if by Sea

    Season 3 Episode 4 - Aired 8/1/2001

    When a hurricane strikes Quohog, everything is destroyed including The Drunken Clam, which is bought out by a Brit who turns it into an English pub. As it happens, pub owner Nigel Pinchley and his family move in next door to the Griffins, and Stewie tries to teach Nigel's Cockney-accented 3-year-old daughter how to speak proper English.

    Director: Dan Povenmire

    Writer: Jim Bernstein, Michael Shipley

  • And the Wiener Is...
    7.6/102,189 votes

    #5 - And the Wiener Is...

    Season 3 Episode 5 - Aired 8/8/2001

    Peter joins a gun club to compensate for his lack of physical assets; Meg becomes the target of the "cool" gang's wrath.

    Director: Bert Ring

    Writer: Matt Weitzman, Mike Barker

  • Death Lives
    8.0/102,288 votes

    #6 - Death Lives

    Season 3 Episode 6 - Aired 8/15/2001

    After a near-death experience on his anniversary, Peter learns the importance of spending time with Lois.

    Director: Rob Renzetti

    Writer: Mike Henry

  • Lethal Weapons
    7.3/102,304 votes

    #7 - Lethal Weapons

    Season 3 Episode 7 - Aired 8/22/2001

    New Yorkers invade the town in the fall; Lois hones her martial-arts skills.

    Director: Pete Michels, Brian Hogan

    Writer: Chris Sheridan

  • The Kiss Seen Around the World
    6.7/102,296 votes

    #8 - The Kiss Seen Around the World

    Season 3 Episode 8 - Aired 8/29/2001

    Meg lands an internship working with the school nerd at a television station.

    Director: Peter Shin, Pete Michels

    Writer: Mark Hentemann

  • Mr. Saturday Knight
    7.3/102,137 votes

    #9 - Mr. Saturday Knight

    Season 3 Episode 9 - Aired 9/5/2001

    Peter decides to pursue his dream career as a knight.

    Director: Michael Dante DiMartino, Peter Shin, Pete Michels

    Writer: Steve Callaghan

  • Fish out of Water
    7.1/102,234 votes

    #10 - Fish out of Water

    Season 3 Episode 10 - Aired 9/19/2001

    When Peter decides to become a fisherman, he takes out a large loan to buy a fishing boat and unwittingly gives up everything he owns as collateral.

    Director: Peter Shin, Pete Michels, Bert Ring

    Writer: Mike Henry, Alex Borstein

  • Emission Impossible
    8.1/102,325 votes

    #11 - Emission Impossible

    Season 3 Episode 11 - Aired 10/8/2001

    Lois' pregnant sister inspires her and Peter to have another baby.

    Director: Peter Shin, Pete Michels

    Writer: David Collard, Ken Goin

  • To Love and Die in Dixie
    8.1/102,428 votes

    #12 - To Love and Die in Dixie

    Season 3 Episode 12 - Aired 11/15/2001

    The Griffins are put into the witness protection program.

    Director: Dan Povenmire, Pete Michels

    Writer: Steve Callaghan

  • Screwed the Pooch
    7.3/102,053 votes

    #13 - Screwed the Pooch

    Season 3 Episode 13 - Aired 11/29/2001

    Peter and Lois go to the Pewterschmidts for the weekend, bringing Brian along. Brian, meanwhile, has some "issues" of his own to work out. Find out if Brian's future is to make puppies or become "less" than he is.

    Director: Pete Michels

    Writer: David Collard, Ken Goin

  • Peter Griffin: Husband, Father... Brother?
    7.6/102,080 votes

    #14 - Peter Griffin: Husband, Father... Brother?

    Season 3 Episode 14 - Aired 12/6/2001

    While trying to teach Chris about his Irish roots, Peter stumbles upon Nate Griffin, a black man in his family tree. Peter tries to embrace his new-found heritage, but can’t quite get the hang of it. When Lois’ father, Carter Pewtershmidt, sits the Griffin kids down for a look at his family genealogy, a dark secret is uncovered.

    Director: Scott Wood

    Writer: Matt Weitzman, Mike Barker

  • Ready, Willing, and Disabled
    7.5/102,046 votes

    #15 - Ready, Willing, and Disabled

    Season 3 Episode 15 - Aired 12/20/2001

    Joe gets discouraged, losing his self-confidence, after he loses a thief in a chase. Peter wants to help Joe get back to his old self so he volunteers to help train him for the decathlon at the Olympics for handicapped athletes. Peter puts steroids into Joe's drink, pushing Joe on to victory. Meanwhile, Stewie, Meg, and Brian fight over $26.

    Director: Andi Klein, Pete Michels

    Writer: Alex Barnow, Marc Firek

  • A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas
    7.6/102,209 votes

    #16 - A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas

    Season 3 Episode 16 - Aired 12/21/2001

    Christmas comes to Quahog! While Lois attempt to make the holidays perfect for the Griffin family, Peter messes it up. Meanwhile, Stewie learns of Santa Claus’ ability to keep 24-hour surveillance on all the world’s children.

    Director: Pete Michels, Brian Hogan

    Writer: Danny Smith

  • Brian Wallows and Peter's Swallows
    7.4/102,205 votes

    #17 - Brian Wallows and Peter's Swallows

    Season 3 Episode 17 - Aired 1/17/2002

    Brian is sentenced to care for a crabby old woman; Peter's beard becomes a home for birds.

    Director: Dan Povenmire, Pete Michels

    Writer: Ali Adler

  • From Method to Madness
    7.4/102,035 votes

    #18 - From Method to Madness

    Season 3 Episode 18 - Aired 1/24/2002

    Stewie attempts a career in show business; Meg dates a nudist.

    Director: Bert Ring

    Writer: Matt Weitzman, Mike Barker

  • Stuck Together, Torn Apart
    7.6/102,007 votes

    #19 - Stuck Together, Torn Apart

    Season 3 Episode 19 - Aired 1/31/2002

    Peter's jealously forces a trial separation; Stewie and Brian get glued together.

    Director: Michael Dante DiMartino

    Writer: Mark Hentemann

  • Road to Europe
    7.8/102,188 votes

    #20 - Road to Europe

    Season 3 Episode 20 - Aired 2/7/2002

    Stewie goes to England to take refuge in his favorite television show, while Lois embarrasses Peter at a KISS concert.

    Director: Dan Povenmire

    Writer: Daniel Palladino

  • Family Guy Viewer Mail #1
    7.4/102,113 votes

    #21 - Family Guy Viewer Mail #1

    Season 3 Episode 21 - Aired 2/14/2002

    Viewer mail inspires three stories in which Peter loses his bones, the Griffins gain superpowers, and Peter and his friends appear as eight-year-old "Little Rascals."

    Director: Michael Dante DiMartino, Pete Michels, Scott Wood

    Writer: Seth MacFarlane, Jim Bernstein, Gene Laufenberg, Michael Shipley

  • When You Wish Upon a Weinstein
    7.3/102,096 votes

    #22 - When You Wish Upon a Weinstein

    Season 3 Episode 22 - Aired 12/10/2004

    The day that Peter buys volcano insurance is the day that Lois becomes fed up with their constant money problems.

    Director: Dan Povenmire

    Writer: Ricky Blitt