The Best Episodes of Family Guy Season 12
Every episode of Family Guy Season 12 ranked from best to worst. Discover the Best Episodes of Family Guy Season 12!
Sick, twisted, politically incorrect and Freakin' Sweet animated series featuring the adventures of the dysfunctional Griffin family. Bumbling Peter and long-suffering Lois have three kids. Stewie (a brilliant but sadistic baby bent on killing his mother and taking over the world), Meg (the oldest, and is the most unpopular girl in town) and Chris (the middle kid, he's not very bright but has a passion for movies). The final member of the family is Brian - a talking dog and much more than a pet, he keeps Stewie in check whilst sipping Martinis and sorting through his own life issues.
Season 12 Ratings Summary
The best episode of "Family Guy" season 12 is "Finders Keepers", rated 6.9/10 from 1809 user votes. It was directed by John Holmquist and written by Anthony Blasucci, Mike Desilets. "Finders Keepers" aired on 9/29/2013 and is rated 1.1 point(s) higher than the second highest rated, "Vestigial Peter".
6.9/10 1,809 votes#1 - Finders Keepers
Season 12 Episode 1 - Aired 9/29/2013
Peter is convinced that a restaurant placemat is a treasure map. Word quickly spreads about the alleged cache, sparking a city-wide search and turning the citizens of Quahog against each other.
Director: John Holmquist
Writer: Anthony Blasucci, Mike Desilets
5.8/10 1,924 votes#2 - Vestigial Peter
Season 12 Episode 2 - Aired 10/6/2013
After a vestigial twin grows out of Peter's neck, which he names Chip, he eventually starts realizing that people like Chip more than they like him, so Peter has him amputated. However, after Peter gets into trouble, he realizes he needs Chip more than ever.
Director: Julius Wu
Writer: Brian Scully
7.1/10 1,720 votes#3 - Quagmire's Quagmire
Season 12 Episode 3 - Aired 11/3/2013
Quagmire dates a woman named Sonja, who is just as sexually active as he is, but things take a turn for the worse when she kidnaps him to be her sex slave, so Peter, Joe and Ida must search the seedy back alleys of Quahog to rescue him. In the meantime, Brian, Stewie and Rupert get involved in a most unusual love triangle.
Director: Pete Michels
Writer: Cherry Chevapravatdumrong
6.7/10 1,687 votes#4 - A Fistful of Meg
Season 12 Episode 4 - Aired 11/10/2013
When Meg spills her lunch on the new kid at school, he makes plans to end her. Meanwhile, Peter keeps harassing Brian in the nude until it reaches the breaking point.
Director: Joe Vaux
Writer: Dominic Bianchi, Joe Vaux
6.5/10 1,620 votes#5 - Boopa-Dee Bappa-Dee
Season 12 Episode 5 - Aired 11/17/2013
The Griffins go to Italy and are faced with annoying immigration laws after Peter destroys their passports.
Director: Mike Kim
Writer: Wellesley Wild
4.7/10 3,430 votes#6 - Life of Brian
Season 12 Episode 6 - Aired 11/24/2013
Stewie and Brian travel back in time to 17th-century Jamestown and make too many close calls with changing history. Stewie decides to destroy his time machine, but comes to regret it when Brian dies after being hit by a car. Devastated by his death, the Griffin family goes out and adopts another dog from the pet store, Vinnie, who is quickly accepted by all the members of the Griffin family, other than Stewie, who can't get over the loss of Brian.
Director: Joseph Lee
Writer: Alex Carter
6.4/10 2,035 votes#7 - Into Harmony's Way
Season 12 Episode 7 - Aired 12/8/2013
When Peter and Quagmire discover that their singing voices create beautiful harmony together, they form a singing/songwriting team, in the vein of Simon and Garfunkel. However, tensions run high when fame gets to Peter’s head.
Director: Brian Iles
Writer: Julius Sharpe
7.6/10 2,075 votes#8 - Christmas Guy
Season 12 Episode 8 - Aired 12/15/2013
When Carter Pewterschmidt cancels the annual Quahog Christmas carnival, because he hates the holiday, Peter must transform his father-in-law from a Scrooge into a hometown hero in order to salvage the event. Meanwhile, Stewie devises a master plan to get the one and only thing he wants for Christmas.
Director: Greg Colton
Writer: Patrick Meighan
6.6/10 1,524 votes#9 - Peter Problems
Season 12 Episode 9 - Aired 1/5/2014
When Peter gets fired for crashing a forklift into a business meeting, Lois takes a job at the grocery store while Peter becomes a stay-at-home dad — which leads to poor bedroom performance.
Director: Bob Bowen
Writer: Teresa Hsiao
7.0/10 1,580 votes#10 - Grimm Job
Season 12 Episode 10 - Aired 1/12/2014
From Grimm to Griffin, three classic fairy tales get a new Quahog spin, including "Jack and the Beanstalk," "Little Red Riding Hood" and "Cinderella."
Director: Joe Vaux
Writer: Alec Sulkin
6.0/10 1,546 votes#11 - Brian's a Bad Father
Season 12 Episode 11 - Aired 1/26/2014
Brian tries to use Dylan's television connections to further his career.
Director: Jerry Langford
Writer: Chris Sheridan
6.3/10 1,431 votes#12 - Mom's the Word
Season 12 Episode 12 - Aired 3/9/2014
When Peter's mother dies, he befriends her longtime pal Evelyn, who tries to seduce him. In the meantime, Stewie feels despair upon dealing with the realities of death.
Director: John Holmquist
Writer: Ted Jessup
6.5/10 1,422 votes#13 - 3 Acts of God
Season 12 Episode 13 - Aired 3/16/2014
Peter grows frustrated when players on opposing teams continue to thank God after defeating his beloved New England Patriots football team, so he and the guys embark on a global quest to find God and ask Him to stop interfering with the outcome of professional football games.
Director: Bob Bowen
Writer: Alec Sulkin
5.4/10 1,620 votes#14 - Fresh Heir
Season 12 Episode 14 - Aired 3/23/2014
Chris becomes the heir to Carter's fortune but refuses to accept the money; Peter desperately tries to keep the wealth in the family.
Director: Mike Kim
Writer: Steve Callaghan
6.9/10 1,381 votes#15 - Secondhand Spoke
Season 12 Episode 15 - Aired 3/30/2014
Peter takes up smoking cigarettes, and is approached by Mr. Stone, an advertising executive who wants Peter to be the face of his anti-smoking campaign under the caveat that Peter continues to smoke. Meanwhile, Stewie helps Chris battle bullies at school.
Director: Julius Wu
Writer: David Ihlenfeld, David Wright
5.7/10 1,568 votes#16 - Herpe, the Love Sore
Season 12 Episode 16 - Aired 4/6/2014
Brian gives Stewie an STD. Meanwhile, Peter and the guys fight back when another group claims their booth at The Drunken Clam.
Director: Greg Colton
Writer: Andrew Goldberg
6.9/10 1,392 votes#17 - The Most Interesting Man in the World
Season 12 Episode 17 - Aired 4/13/2014
When Peter takes Stewie to the park for some quality father-son time, he mistakenly takes the wrong baby home, prompting Lois to call him an idiot. Determined to prove to her that he's a responsible adult, Peter goes on a business trip to Chicago and returns as an intelligent, classy person.
Director: Joseph Lee
Writer: Tom Devanney
6.7/10 1,397 votes#18 - Baby Got Black
Season 12 Episode 18 - Aired 4/27/2014
Chris is forbidden to see Jerome's daughter Pam, so when the kids run away together, Jerome and Peter must work together to find them.
Director: Brian Iles
Writer: Travis Bowe, Kevin Biggins
7.1/10 1,345 votes#19 - Meg Stinks!
Season 12 Episode 19 - Aired 5/4/2014
Meg has fun partying with Peter when he takes her to a college for an interview. Brian must learn how to live in the wild when he gets sprayed by a skunk and is prohibited from entering the house.
Director: Bob Bowen
Writer: Danny Smith
7.1/10 1,377 votes#20 - He's Bla-ack!
Season 12 Episode 20 - Aired 5/11/2014
Cleveland returns to town, but is instantly banned from spending time with Peter when Lois and Donna get into a big fight over parenting.
Director: Steve Robertson
Writer: Julius Sharpe
7.0/10 1,352 votes#21 - Chap Stewie
Season 12 Episode 21 - Aired 5/18/2014
When Peter and Chris interrupt Stewie’s TV time, the angry baby goes back in time to break up Peter and Lois so he’s never conceived, but is shocked when he is reborn into a “Downton Abbey”-esque British household.
Director: Joe Vaux
Writer: Artie Johann, Shawn Ries